


The Golden Tile

by High King Fen (Gizmo)



Series: To days gone by [1]
Category: The Magicians (TV)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Blood, Blow Jobs, Cunnilingus, Depression, F/M, Fingering, Foreplay, Funerals, Hand Jobs, Lifetime timeloop, M/M, Masturbation, Mention of Past Domestic Violence, Miscarriage, Multi, Orgasm Denial, Peaches and Plums, Playful Sex, Ridding, Shower Sex, Teasing, accidental date, confusion about nipples, lights bondage, more tag to come as the fic grows
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-05
Updated: 2018-08-07
Packaged: 2019-03-27 12:28:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 31
Words: 75,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13880883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gizmo/pseuds/High%20King%20Fen
Summary: The story of a lifetime that was well lived, well loved and the key to the beauty of all life





	1. Prologue: The Cottage

The Cottage and its mosaic have been in Fillory as long as any fillorians could remember. Somewhere between The Great Salt River and The Burning River, near the town of Barion but far enough that it takes a full day walk to go, the small house had been used by many traveler and quester who wanted to solve the greatest mystery of Fillory; creating a mosaic that illustrate the beauty of all life. Despite its many residents over the years, there was nothing welcoming into the wooden house; there was a hole in the roof, a bed that was destroyed by time and a stove that was so rusty that it always left a taste of copper in whatever you cook. It never protected you from the cold of the snow and when the wind was strong it always felt like the whole place could be destroyed. It felt that the more people were trying to solve the mosaic and failing, the more the house was going into disrepair. 

The mosaic had 784 tiles in 15 different colors. Which means, theres is 17,366,606,286,739,300,000,000,000,000,000 possible paterns possible but only one that is the right one. 

It has been years now since anyone had ventured there and the place was almost forgotten. From time to time, some men from Barion or Brightshaven would come for a couple of days, trying to solve the puzzle. But it was mostly to say that they tried it and less about the price; this golden key must be powerful if so much hardship comes into getting it. After a day or two, the men would go back to their village, tell the story of the mosaic, talk about its lore and then continue their life and forget almost about it. It had become a rite of passage for some father to ask a man who requested their daughter's hand to go and try to solve the puzzle for a fortnight. If they came back and were not insane from the tries and failure, they were allowed to marry their daughter; no one ever expected anyone to solve it. It was a test of will more than an actual solvable mystery. 

Then a few months ago, two young men weirdly dressed came to the cottage and took over the task. At first, it was not much to talk about. But when they came to Barion and bought food, crafting supplies and clothes, villagers got curious. Soon The Cottage seemed to have been repaired, food came and went days and night they tried to solve the puzzle. And yet, they stayed. After their fifth months, most of the people in the north-west of Fillory knew about them. Bets were made on how long they would last. No one gave them more than a year. 

As time passed, traveling merchants changed their route to include The Cottage. Both men seemed to get most of their food provided that way and were rarely seen in towns. They always paid their due, despite not working an actual job and doing the mosaic. 

And today, everyone that had put a wage on their willpower lost their bet; it was now a full year and both men were still hard working and far from giving up.


	2. 1- Quentin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Today is the first year of The Mosaic journey and Quentin... is quentining out

 

If Quentin calculations and the fillorian calender were correct, today marked the first year of Eliot and him being into the past, working on the mosaic. In three hundread and sixty five day, they might have takeIf Quentin calculations and the fillorian calender were correct, today marked the first year of Eliot and him being into the past, working on the mosaic. In three hundred and sixty-five days, they might have taken only two days off, and they were because of a storm so substantial that a tree nearby the cottage had fallen. It had taken the whole day after to cut the thing down properly and now they had wood for colder nights which, when you think about it, was a good silver lining.

 

When he woke up that morning, it felt strange that Eliot was not around. The older boy had wanted to go to Barion to get supplies for a special meal he wanted to do in celebration of their first year. Quentin had pointed out that being happy that they failed every single day for a year was not really something he planned to do, Eliot just had simply smile and reminded him that they didn't fail, they just had found three hundred and sixty-three way that the mosaic was not working. He always said shit like that when Quentin felt discouraged and it was a perfect way not to argue about it.

Eliot had left yesterday for the town, so if everything went like their previous trip back there, he would be back before the end of the afternoon. Meanwhile, Quentin was alone in The Cottage and it felt too quiet and too big for him alone.

So Quentin pulled up a pair of brown slacks with a baggy shirt, knowing fully well that Eliot would hate what he was wearing but he wasn't there and it was too early to pretend he cared about matching his outfit.

Eating his oatmeal, looking outside, the young magicians started to realize that, despite always looking for time alone like this, whenever he or Eliot was going to the city, they always end up missing each other. Maybe it was that they had been pulled from one another so many time and now they literally had to live together, but there was always an anxiety rising in Quentin's chest when Eliot wasn't around for more than a few hours.

_Or maybe it's because you've been thinking about him yesterday when you masturbated and now you feel guilty._

Annoyed by his own mind talking to him, Quentin quickly threw the dirty bowl into the sink and went outside to start the day. Soon the dairy farmer that was selling them cheese and unpasteurized milk would come deliver their weekly goods against the few piles of money they'd gather by doing small jobs here and there with their magic. They always made sure the person asking for the service was not seeing it, but repairing a barn is easier with the Joseph Englewood spell number four than doing by hand.

If he was true to himself Quentin was starting to like the routine they were having here. Doing the mosaic, talking to different vendor depending on the day of the week, going to bed physically exhausted after having smoking herbs with Eliot or read a book they'd end up trading with other fillorians.

At first, people would come to them asking for enchantments and spells. At first, they'd barter food and clothes against them but when it became clear that their skills were real, more and more people had started to show up, distracting them from their main task and demanding them time and knowledge they didn't have. Yes, they were good magicians, still, they didn't know every spell and there was no nearby magical library like at Brakebills. So Eliot had shut the whole thing down and within the same month, people had stopped coming. Quentin called this ability to spread rumors and knowledge around a real gif, Eliot called it talking to the right blabbermouth. Either way, now they were focused on the quest and it was better that way

As predicted, the dairy farmer arrived while Quentin was looking over the design of the day. He paid him, store the goods inside and went into working. It was back crushing and tedious but better try to do a mosaic pattern than wait aimlessly for Eliot to come back. Plus placing the tile was not hard, finding the right way to do it was.

Usually, the task was mind numbing but, for whatever reason, today it wasn't. The anxiety that had risen up in his chest was not leaving, worse it was expanding. It felt like a pressure around his heart that started to hurt. He knew he needed to stop and calm down when he dropped a yellow tile and cut his hand trying to grab the fragment. The wound wasn't big and a spell easily healed his hand while another fixed the tile. But now he notices he'd drop the tile because his hand was trembling. Great. Just fucking great. Now he was having an anxiety attack.

Walking away from the mosaic, he sat on a bench near it, cleaning the dry blood on his nail and try to look on the road near the house. It was wishful thinking to hope that Eliot would arrive earlier but fuck he wish he was here right now. Quentin knew what to do when anxiety struck him like that. That wasn't the problem. He just hated being alone when it did. He just knew that Eliot was one of the rare people to actually calm him down when it happens.

He took a deep breath and close his eyes, trying to regulate his breathing. He knew that the reason for this wave of anxiety was not because he was missing Eliot. It was because his absence meant something. It was because he'd realize last night that he might be falling in love with his best friend.

Was it loneliness or meant to happen? He didn't know. He didn't want to know.

''Oh god. '' He said, putting his head between his leg, feeling the nerves hitting his stomach and making him nauseous.

No no no no no. He couldn't allow himself to think or feel that way. Not after he almost fucked up everything. Cheating on Alice with him and Margo not only had broken up his couple but had put a gap in a friendship that meant the world to him. More than that, he didn't know who he was as a magician and a man without Eliot anymore. Trying to stay away from Fillory had meant from him and Quentin had lost his way so badly it took everything to bring him back.

And what brought him was Eliot. When he'd left him he was a boy pretending to be king. An addict who didn't have the emotional capacity or preparation for the task in front of him. And when he came back to Earth against his will, Quentin had found a grown-up Eliot. A man ready to admit his flaw but ready to fight for something bigger than his personal problem and his addiction. And it what this man that had been able to close the gap between them that the threesome and death of Alice soon after had created. It was him who reminded Quentin of his responsibility but also, of their friendship.

Of course, he'd fucked it up right away by killing all magic and locking both of them physically apart from one another. Those two months were pure agony and he still remembers the hollowness he felt when he realizes that not only magic was gone, but their capacity to travel from one world to another.

Of course, once again it was Eliot who found a solution and got back to him.

And now that things were in a good place, he was about to fuck everything up again. He couldn't be happy. He couldn't do like he always did and pushed away from the part of him that was always drawn to him. Eliot and Margo might not remember their night, but Quentin still remembers Eliot lips on his and how his hand felt on his skin.

Fuck fuck fucks fuck fuck.

Unable to stop himself spiraling, Quentin went inside the house, filled the sink with water and dipped his head in it. The freezing sensation bitting his skin made his mind snapped out of its tornado to focus on the pain and wetness of the body. It was not a recommended method to do usually, but it was better than nothing.

After dunking his head a few time in the water, Quentin grabbed a towel to dry his hair. Looking at the sun it was past noon now but his anxiety had cut his appetite. He quickly decided to skip lunch and go back to finish the mosaic while he felt actually aware of his surroundings and not lost somewhere in his mind

Eliot arrived when he only had three row's left. By then his hair was dry and he'd snack on one of the plums left on the fruit bowl on the table.

''I'll put the stuff down and come to help. '' Eliot had said after a greeting. But Quentin waved him off.

''You must be tired. Go take a bath, I'll be finished by then and we'll do dinner. ''

''By we you mean, I and you will look at me and talk.''

''Do you want me to cook''

''Oh fuck no.''

Both men chuckle and Eliot went inside. Quentin couldn't help to look at the door his friend just disappear to. A small smile crept on his lips. Now _home f_ elt complete.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the overwhelming response and encouragement to continue the fic! Hope y'all like this chapter ! Don't forget to comment or kudo! :D


	3. 2- Eliot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For once Eliot had listened to Quentin and actually made himself a bath.

For once Eliot had listened to Quentin and actually made himself a bath. His feet were killing him and the bed in the inn he'd stay was most likely made of straw; his whole body ached. This was a first for him, but Eliot miss being a king. At least they had a carriage and could go from one place to another more quickly. But since last time they had wanted to see an actual crown before recognizing him as High King, he doubted that his peasant clothes would do the trick. Plus, it would be an actual mess to be a High King again when all his focus needed to be on the mosaic and not on crops and other fillorian problems. 

With a quick spell, he filled the bathtub with warm water, using magic every moment he could. He was a junkie back to the best of drugs; magic. He let himself sink into the water before trying to relax, but his mind was full of images and question only long hours of walking alone can bring to you. He'd let himself do something he shouldn't have and started to think of Margo. One of the last things he'd heard from her was that she was about to get married, and now that he was stuck in the past he couldn't help her or even simply ask her how the fuck did she ended up getting married. And to whom? The first was easy, probably the Fairy Queen doing another of her evil plot just screw them up. To whom... that was another good question. Probably not Lorians. He hopes she didn't end up with a Joffrey Baratheon type of king. Tough, if someone had the ability to train dragons and set them ablaze against her own husband, it was her. 

To be frank, if he had decided to leave for Barion and do such a long walk was not for a deep desire for fresh meat, wine or fruits. They could all get decent food from the vendors that were coming each week. Minus the wine but there were spells for that and half the time it produces something decent enough to get drunk without having a hangover the day after. No, if he left, it was to give Quentin space. When his friend had pointed out that it was nearly their first year in Fillory, Eliot didn't saw the panic or discouragement he expected. He saw fear and sadness. 

Quentin had a lot more to lose back in the future than him. Yes, they both had a group of friends, but if the last year had proven him something, it was that the only real friends he had were Margo and Quentin. The others were only satellites around them that he had to manage carefully. Julia, Alice, Penny, Kady, they were nice and sometimes even fun to be around. But he didn't have the bond of trust and friendship Quentin was easily able to make them have. He even made Penny care which, in itself, was quite impressive. Quentin had lost a lot of friends, him, he'd only lost Margo. 

Oh yes, there was Fen too, but if he was honest with himself, she was better without him. Not only he'd ruin her life by getting her into a loveless marriage, but they had made her life a nightmare when the fairies entered Whitespires and if she'd lost her mind, it was totally his and Margo's fault. Maybe having Fray now with her would soothe some part of her that craves to be a mother. He knew he was not the material to be a good father or a good husband and now, she would be free of everything and able to have a quieter life. At least he hoped. He knew Margo would make sure she was alright. 

Eliot decided to get out of the bed before he decided to drown himself to stop spiraling from one gloomy idea to another and start the meal he'd promise Quentin to cheer him up. He didn't teach any pork chop could lift his mood, but it would be good and make them think something else. They clearly both needed distraction. 

Throwing his traveling clothes in the laundry basket, he put the outfit he'd worn the first day they arrive here. It was starting to be thin at some places and he'd lost some weight not having ravishing meals every day, but they were symbolic or something. After making sure his hair was passable and the bags under his eyes were not as visible, he went into the room and start preparing dinner. 

Quentin came inside about an hour later, and since there was no cry of joy or panic attack he knew it was another day of failed attempts. Not that he expected any less but it would have been the kind of symbolic bullshit Fillory was so good about; finding the right thing the day they celebrated their first year here. Alas, there was nothing. 

''Go take a bath, I put clean clothes on the bed.'' Eliot simply said as he started to whisk a sauce to dip the meat in it. 

The grunt he got back as an answer made him think it was probably a good idea that the younger magicians relax as well. He didn't want any grumpiness while they were eating food that took him nearly two days to get. 

Eliot started to hum as he cooks, finding that, despite all its flaws and backward thinking, at least fillorians knew how to do cookwares and good products for a cheap price. He got everything for so cheap it would barely buy him a good wine bottle in New York. 

'' Are you signing Hamilton?'' he heard Quentin's voice echoing from the bathroom. 

Eliot laughed and started a rather good rendition of Satisfied, one of his favorite song he would drunkenly sing with Margo back in Whitespire. How many time he felt he was signing it at Quentin as he was pinning for Alice. At least, here, his heart problem was literally away. Maybe it was why he looked less and less like tired. 

When Quentin got out of the bathroom, he was cleaning and seemed in a better mood. He'd even put his wet hair in a bun which made Eliot smile loving how he started to do it more and more since he complimented him about his face not being always covered up. 

They ended up talking about improvements the house needed and gossip he'd pick up from Barion until dinner was ready and they ate like the kings they were. Unusually, they were too tired to cook proper food and having a two-course meal and a desert felt right and did what Eliot had hoped; it had lifted Quentin's mood. 

''It's the main night to see shooting stars'' Quentin said, a bit drunk from their second bottle of wine, looking out the window. '' Let's go watch them.'' 

Eliot snorted at the idea but when he noticed his friend seem genuinely interested in the project, he approved with a laugh. Anything to make him continue to have that dumb smile of his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks again for all the kind kudos and comment that made me kick my butt and write faster. You are so encouraging and I love you all


	4. 3- Eliot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was a first kiss, then more than one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Granjolrass for helping me with the sexy part, as always you are a master of smutt

**Eliot**

  
When Quentin kissed him, he froze; which was unlike him. Never in his life had someone put a move on him that had taken by surprise like that. For two seconds, his brain shut down completely. But then he opened his eyes to a nervous smile and eyes full of fear and lust and oh god, he couldn't resist. His brain rebooted.

Despite everything he'd told himself over the past year and how he'd promised never to compromise their friendship over his stupid crush on him, Eliot couldn't help himself. He grinned and returned the kiss. But this time, it wasn't a kiss full of lust caused by an overload of emotions. This time he would have to live with the consequences of the kiss. And he didn't care, because it was the kind of consequence he was ready to accept. And if Quentin was finally ready, he could allow himself to be honest about his own feelings.

At first it had been pure lust. He had thought of Quentin as a conquest, reveled in the though of him writhing beneath his touch. But as their relationship developed, he came to understand it was something deeper than a simple attraction. After Mike, he'd been too scared and broken to even think about letting himself open up again. Then they were hunting the beast, and he got married, and Quentin lost Alice and everything became so complicated. The idea that he would ever be able to have Quentin became a fantasy. And yet, here they were; living in a house together, getting to live out this domestic fantasy; even if solving an impossible puzzle was part of the deal. He brought his attention back to his lips. The kiss they were sharing was so tender, so full of- something. Eliot wasn’t quite ready to put a word to the feeling. Lust didn’t feel right, neither did Passion, but he wasn’t about to let himself admit he was in love; not yet.

Eliot threaded his fingers through Quentin’s hair, parting his lips to deepen the kiss. Yet it was still tender, romantic. Eliot felt Quentin’s quivering hand press against his chest. He wondered if Quentin could feel how fast his heart was beating; a Morse code that begged “I need you”. He put his hand over his reassuringly.Eliot pulled away, meeting his gaze.

“We don't have to.” He said, retracting his fingers from Quentin’s hair and resting his hand on Quentin’s cheek.

The brunette frowned. “You don't want to?” Quentin asked, making a face that reminded Eliot of a sad puppy. He tried not to grin.  
“Oh, believe me-“ He said, his hand trailing down Quentin’s neck and resting in his chest. “I want to.” He said, pausing for a moment. “But last time, I fucked everything up. This time I want to do it right.” He said, finally.

There was a beat of silence as they met each other‘s gaze. Eliot could feel Quentin’s eyes searching for something in his own. And then, there was a moment of wordless understanding. Quentin leaned in to reunite their lips, and that was all the permission Eliot needed. He returned the kiss, with more hunger than before. His fingers went to work, expertly unzipping Quentin’s hoodie and pushing it off his shoulders. The first time they had been together had been messy, and quick, and fuzzy with intoxication. But this time, Eliot would remember ever detail. Every moan, every hitch of Quentin’s breath, the way he bit his lip when he was trying to hold back; he didn’t want to forget a moment of it. And he would do his best to make sure Quentin didn’t forget it either.

Quentin’s moan reverberated against his lips as he felt fingers fumbling with the buttons of his vest. Soon it was on the ground beside the hoodie. He could feel the cool night air on his chest as Quentin popped open the first few buttons of his shirt.

He moved his lips to Quentin’s neck, taking skin between his teeth and sucking gently; leaving his mark there. The moan this elicited went straight to Eliot’s cock. He slid his hand under Quentin’s shirt, tracing fingers over his abdomen. He treated his body with reverence exploring every inch of his skin. Quentin sighed, his own fingers sliding under Eliot’s shirt which was parted just enough to allow the hand passage. Eliot gasped as he felt Quentin’s hand slide down, rolling a nipple between his fingers. Apparently, he had been paying attention the last time they slept together. Eliot let his fingers wander lower, popping open the button of Quentin’s jeans. He unzipped them slowly, sliding a finger beneath the waistband of his boxers teasingly. Quentin sucked in a breath as Eliot’s fingers grazed past the coarse hairs teasingly. Quentin groaned, arching up into his touch. He felt the fingers pull away from his chest and thread themselves through his hair.

“El-“ He said, his voice full of need. “Please-“

The desperation in his voice sent a shiver down Eliot’s spine. He retracted his lips from Quentin’s neck and slipped his hand out of his pants, pushing them down just enough to slip his cock out. He met His gaze, smirking as he took him in his hand. Quentin let out a visceral groan as Eliot began to stroke him. The way he looked at Eliot in that moment was something he never wanted to forget. He took his time, starting at a slow pace, his thumb rubbing the tip of his cock with each upward stroke. Quentin moaned, leaning back and bracing himself against the ground with his hands. His ponytail had long since come undone, and his hair splayed across his shoulders. Eliot grinned, leaning in to kiss Quentin’s exposed neck as he worked. Quentin mewled as Eliot left marks across his neck as he licked and bit and sucked, his hand stroking his cock at a steady pace. Quentin’s fingers reached up to grip Eliot’s hair, his breaths quickening. Eliot sped up his strokes to match pace, retracting his lips so he could watch Quentin’s face when he came. A moment later, he was rewarded. Eliot watched and Quentin threw back his head, his lips parting obscenely as he let out a cry, moaning Eliot’s name. Eliot smirked, making sure Quentin watched as he licked his fingers clean. He grinned, leaning in to press a kiss on his jaw as Quentin tried to catch his breath, working up his jawline and resting his lips on his ear.

“You’re beautiful when you come.” He whispered, tugging on Quentin’s earlobe with his teeth.

Even in the moonlight, he could see the flush on his face. Quentin wet his lips, tucking himself back into his boxers. Then suddenly, it was like a switched flipped. Quentin grabbed his face, pulling him in for a hungry kiss. Eliot suddenly found himself on his back, Quentin on top of him with a look behind his eyes Eliot had never seen before.

“Your turn.” Quentin said with a grin. He popped another button of Eliot’s shirt open, sliding his hand in and pinching Eliot’s nipple as he pressed in for another rough kiss.

Eliot moaned into his lips. Quentin taking control like this was practically enough to make him come on it’s own. He closed his eyes, reaching his hands up to thread through Quentin’s hair. He felt Quentin retreat from the kiss, and suddenly he felt the wet warmth of Quentin’s tongue on his nipple. He let out a loud moan, arching his hips up against him for friction.

“Jesus Christ Q-“ He could feel Quentin smiling against his skin, then let out another gasp as Quentin took the nipple between his teeth. “Oh fuck-“ He moaned, grinding against him again.

Quentin continued, biting and licking until Eliot was a writhing mess. After a minute, Quentin pulled back and smirked up at him, his lips red and swollen. He kept his gaze as he undid Eliot’s belt, opening his pants. He pushed them down just low enough to get his cock out, then, locking eyes with him, he lowered himself and took the head of his cock into his mouth. Eliot muttered a slew of obscenities, watching as Quentin took him deeper.

“Fuck-“ He said gripping his hair. “Fuck yes-“

He arched his back, coaxing more of himself into Quentin’s mouth, and he obliged, taking him deeper. Quentin moaned around his cock and he tightened his grip on his hair, bringing his free and to rest on his own chest and Quentin start to set a pace. It didn’t take much coaxing before Eliot was coming into his mouth. He moaned loudly, watching as Quentin swallowed and lick his lips. He climbed back up beside him and they lay like that for a moment, the moonlight cascading over them as they stared silently upward trying to catch their breath. Eliot was the first to speak.

“Well, no key, so apparently that wasn’t the beauty of all life.”  
Quentin smacked him lightly. “You’re an idiot.” He said, but the kiss that followed betrayed him said otherwise. “Having sex on things disent fix them.”

Eliot sat up and shrugged, putting back his shirt as the cold hit his sking

“Mmm not entirely true in my experience.”


	5. 4- Arielle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arielle started to sell plum when he mother was too ill to do it herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you to Jasper and Seth who helped me stop my existentialist crisis over this chapter and kept it going

The Lanclair family had their farm for generations. A retirement gift from the High King after years of devotion and servitude in the Royal Guard and, even, as chief of the guard during wartime. Since then, the farm had grown from a simple pasture and two peach tree to acres of fruit trees and many cows, horses, goat, chicken and other food providers. Most of the animals were making the family self-sufficient and, for the thing they couldn't grow or heard, they could barter what they had in extra. 

Still in the countryside, but near the big town of Barion, they'd struck a deal with a local merchant there that would sell their peach and keep part of the profit he made from selling them. And since there was a lot of farmers and craftsman in the area, they soon started to do a weekly run towards houses that would buy or barter. When the peaches would not be on seasons and still too young to be picked, the farm was keeping the adult busy enough for the days, while they sent the kids to enjoy their youth and play. Since Queen Yana's reign, a school had been built not far from them and the kids were sent there to learn how to read, count and think, which made them more educated than many. Most families couldn't afford to have their child not working on the farm, and those who were sent were mostly prodigy or in hope for them to get better and well-paid jobs. But when it was the time of the harvest, even the school closed so all the children could gather the product of their farm and sell their goods for a harsher time.

Arielle was the fifth child of a family of eight. Most of them were boys but she had a sister ten year her elder which was as much a mother figure than her own mother was. She spends most of her childhood playing in the peach field and trying to help on the farm even if it really meant she was petting the animals while the grown-ups were doing the real work. When she was old enough, her mother and sister showed her how to make their famous peach pie people would come and buy from time to time as well as everything she needed to know to be a good housewife; sewing, cleaning, cooking, decorating and other things men were too busy to do. Her family had a love for knowledge and going to school was never a chore, tough waking up her younger brother and walking with them there was. She was taking pride that she could read and do maths. It was not only important skills to have when you are trading and counting money, but it also made you look good in front of people. She knew that the more intelligent she got, the more she could hope for a better prospect than a farmer. Which, lets face it, could be nice. 

The family didn't own a lot of books, but those they had were pretty useful, cookbooks and gardening tips and first aid poultice that always helped on the farm and made their dinner rarely a boring thing. She cherished the moments with her mother and sister where they would roll dough for meat pies and sing Fillorians song while the men were hard at work. Not only she felt part of something big and full of love, but there was a pride in knowing what she was making would be appreciated at the table. The men were doing the real work but never looked down what the girls were doing. 

When her sister married the neighbor older son, there had been much delight. Not only those two had been pinning for each other for years, but it had meant that they had access to the plum tree the family had. For a moment, Arielle's father had in his mind to grow their fruits sellings with something new and, with time and a bit of care, they could make more plum trees and made them profitable. As Delilah left for the house next door, plums started to appear in the Lanclair's meal and selling goods. Seeing the positive reaction to both the family and the customers, Arielle had made a special trip into town to get new cookbooks that included a fruit she never worked with before. 

One of her brothers married to a seamstress in Barion and moved there a few months later. And when the third older brother decided to join the guard of Whitespire, it became clear that the boys who left would stay in the farm to help as much as possible since they were down a lot of hands. During harvest, Lunk and Hendrik, the two brothers next door, would come and help them pick up the fruits, in exchange for their help to make the plum tree grow bigger and healthier. 

Everything was turning well and she knew, in a couple of years, her father would talk about marrying her. She prayed Ember and Umber that her hard work at school and in the house would make her meet someone special. Out of the ordinary that would make this farming life a little bit brighter. She didn't want to become a noble or nothing that big. It was foolish to hope only little girl could have. But at least, she knew it was not too far a dream to hope for someone that would like her intellect and not put in down, like a lot of insecure men did around her. 

It all changed when, on a cold and harsh winter, her mother got a cold that never went away. As she was getting sicker and sicker, Arielle took over more and more responsibilities and took over the management of the house. They didn't have the means to get a real doctor from High Town, but there was a healer, up the hill, that had a lot of knowledge and she was the best solution for many farmers of the area. Nakia was never to give false hope and the way she frowned when she saw her patient had Arielle worried. The healer instructions were clear; her mother should stay in bed, make little effort, eat hot meals and drink a poultice made of herb and honey she sold them for a low price. 

This is how Arielle started to do what her mother had done since she moved in the Lanclair farm as a young bride; the weekly walk around the area to sell the peaches -and now plums – to other farmer and barter goods and money. They were starting to get more and more clients and couldn't afford to stop, even if it meant that no one would take care of the house for one day each week. Her mother had to come and fill her basket and bag at least twice in order to fill everyone's desire.

It was Elias, the youngest of her brother, that suggested one night over the table, that she asked Lunk or Hendrick to carry heavier bags so she could get to do the walk faster. The week after Lunk arrived with empty baskets and a large bag, ready to help her carrying most of her supplies. During the walk, he told her he was sent there because his father was hoping both of them would get married by next winter. The way he was disgusted by it made Arielle laugh and felt more reassured around him than if he would have agreed with her father; there was nothing wrong with arranged marriage. It was something common in Fillory. But if farmers didn’t have the wealth or luxury of the nobles, they had one thing; the chance to choose, to fall in love, to be happy. She knew her chance was slim to find true love while doing the same thing and meeting the same people each week, but part of her still hoped. Her childish part maybe. 

Lunk became a companion and a friend rather quickly. They talked about his latest relationship with a boy from Brass city and all the problem being so far was causing. She was used to the gossips her clients would give her, but those were more entertaining; between the death of a cow and a love story, the choice was easy. One month after they started their weekly walk, Lunk had broken up with his lover and admitted to her that it was more for the sex than anything. Once again, another pleasure of being away from arranged marriage and nobility; you didn’t have to be pure for the wedding. Oh, it was frown upon a bit, but more and more people were starting to sleep together before wedlock and only the older generation was truly offended by it. 

On week nine, Arielle realized how she was becoming impatient from those walks and longs talk with Lunk. Between taking care of her fading mother and keeping the house proper, those few hours away from the farm were keeping her sane. They were her freedom. That night as they walked back home with the traded goods and coins, she told him everything she swore never to complain about; her mother, her duties, her brothers. She’d ended up crying in his arm as he made her stop walking and hugged her. Because some human warmth and comfort were really what she was craving. They kissed that night. It was not out of love but more out of an acknowledgement that both of them were healing from heart wounds. It was shared compassion and hurt. But when he left her at her door, one last kiss after, she couldn’t help but smile. 

Around their families, they acted as friends and coworkers. The last thing they both wanted was anyone to start thinking about marrying them or something like that. They had both agree that they were there for each other and they did care for each other, but love was too big of a word to be put on things. None of them was sure or ready to even think about it. So they used the few hours alone to hold hands, cuddle and kiss. Far away from anyone’s eyes, Their walks became longer since they did stop once or twice, but no one noticed it. Or if they did, they were kind enough not to say a thing about it. 

When her mom died they slept together. As most of her family were in the house, mourning, and crying, she had this urge to flee. Lunk window had lit and she’d threw a rock at it until he came and saw her disheveled, sobbing and shaking. Even if it was not proper, he brought her to his room and she cried in his arm for hours. Her heart was emptied and she craved for love, to stop feeling this numbness surrounding her and he made her forget everything for at least an hour or two. 

The woods became a place where they could taste their flesh and own pleasure. They would sneak out of their house to meet and indulge in lust, more than once their walking run took until sunset since they got lost in each other. Lunk was a great friend and a great lover. It was never filling the void of her mother’s death, but it was a temporary solution that worked for her. 

Gossips were something they were pretty aware of and they decided to tell their family they were courting each other so they wouldn’t try to sneak on them to find them in inappropriate behaviors. They were rarely alone in a room after that but their walk was still their thing. When challenged to bring a chaperone, it had been Delilah who had saved her saying Arielle was too busy selling and coming home before dawn to do anything with Lunk that holding hand and kissing. Their father had agreed and her older sister had winked at her in a mischievous way. Later that night, Delilah gave her the recipe for a poultice that could prevent pregnancy and made her promise to be smart. The day after she went to see Nakia and got the herbs needed against one of her famous peaches and cream pie. 

To avoid going in front of the empty house, Arielle and Lunk always walk inside of Mrs. Mahar wheat field. She might not totally be aware of their shortcut but it has saved them a lot of time over the half year they were doing this route together. Sometime they would meet people claiming powerful magicians were now living there but Lunk had laughed it off, pointing out that any person that calls himself a magician is a Child of Earth and they don’t belong in that wreck of a place but they have their butt secured in Whitespire. It was divine Law. And with Queen Yana alone on the throne, if there were other people from Earth, he was sure she would have found them and ask for help. After all, Fillory was on the edge of a war. 

The point was, that the rumor of someone living there became bigger and bigger. Of course, Arielle ended up asking about it to Nakia who was the closest to the place. She said she’d seen smoke risen in the horizon. She told her not to think any of it, that many time exhausted travelers would stay there for a week or two, try the puzzle even, but they never lasted. It was not worth thinking of new customer. 

But weeks passed, and they were still there. Anyone that would ever stay in there was either doing the impossible puzzle or incredibly stupid to lodge in a half-rotten cabin miles away from any city. Well, to be fair, trying to do a puzzle that was named impossible was incredibly stupid too. Arielle curiosity got the best of her after they met a traveling merchant from Brass City that came once every season. He said that he’d met two young men there and they had good money. 

‘’If they are potential customers, we should go see. ‘’ Arielle said to Lunk as she watches the traveling merchant get toward the next house with his cart.  
‘’Or you are nosy and want to know what they are all about. ‘’ Said her partner, rolling his eyes. ‘’It’s a waste of time, come on we only have one house to do and we can go home. ‘’

She watched Lunk go toward Mrs. Mahar’s field and bit her lips. Everything in her guts was telling her to go find out about the strangers at The Cottage and, usually, her instincts were good. There was a way The Gods were placing people in your way for a reason. She met Lunk right before a moment where she would need someone else but her family to lean on. Maybe that she met this traveler for a reason. 

‘’I’m going! ‘’ She shouted to Lunk as he was far from here. 

She heard him curse and call her but she didn’t care. She wanted to go and she would. The walk was not so long, but it made her have to do a detour around a swamp to go see Nakia. She knew Lunk would complain the whole way but she didn’t care. Right now she was having it her way and that’s what’s mattered. 

She was hearing bickering voices as she turned the corner that leads to The Cottage. She was a bit surprising to see a young man perched on a homemade ladder, a large stick in hand while another man his age was menacing to put a green tile up his butt. She couldn’t help but smile at the dynamic. Her brothers were like that and even worse sometimes. In order to get their attention and to ease the visible tension between them, she grabbed one of the plums at the top of her basket and threw it toward the long-haired boy. 

‘’Peaches? Plum?’’ She said, greeting him with a warm smile. 

By the startled and confused looks of the boys, she understood that they were not seeing a lot of people around. Granted, The Cottage was meant to be out of the farming life there was around here. 

‘’Arielle’’ She said presenting herself.

‘’Hi, I’m Eliot, this is my friend Quentin. ‘’ Said the short-haired man who was perched on the ladder. 

With this kind of names and the weird clothes they were wearing, Arielle was starting to wonder where they came from. She never saw Lorians but she heard they were always in furs due to their cold weather. 

‘’This is my helper, Lunk.’’ She said as the tall boy finally arrived. 

The way he put his hand around her waist and kissed her was sweet but the timing was not the best. She knew it was probably because she was curious about two other boys but, to be fair, she didn’t even knew who live there. For all she knew it could have been elderly people or two girls even. One sure thing, they didn’t look like the powerful magicians the traveling merchant had said. And she will have to talk with Lunk about this possessive attitude. That was not like him at all. 

‘’I sell peaches and plums once a week to people around. ‘’ Arielle said, blushing from the kiss. Let's admit it, Lunk was a good kisser. ‘’I usually avoid coming here since there’s no one but I was told there was newcomers, so I wanted to great you. ‘’  
‘’Pleasure to meet you’’ Said Eliot with a warm smile as his friend was silent and smiling shyly. ‘’And honestly eating something other than apples would be great. ‘’  
‘’I...I’ll go get money. ‘’ Said Quentin, turning to go inside the house.  
‘’Oh! No no!’’ Arielle said, realizing that she was more coming as an introduction to their products than an actual sell. That had been one of his mom secrets; the first is always free because they will want more after trying. ‘’ Let me give you some.. as a welcome to this part of the land. ‘’ 

With a grunt, Lunk grabbed one of the empty bags in his pouch and started to fill it with plums and peaches. 

‘’Thanks. ‘’ Said Quentin as he got the offerings. Eliot was now down the latter and grabbed a peach.  
‘’Can you come back next week? We’ll give you a review of it. ‘’ The dark hair man said.  
‘’Without a problem, I already know its way better than apples. ‘’ Arielle couldn’t help but laugh. ‘’ See you next week’’  
‘’Thank you again for these. ‘’ Eliot said as Quentin was eating a plum. 

The face he made was encouraging. 

‘’I never saw you give things for nothing, since when are you doing this’’ Grumbled Lunk as they walk away from The Cottage.  
‘’It’s not for nothing, it’s a selling trick my mom gave me. ‘’ 

Thinking and speaking of her did make her lose her smile but, she noticed the hole in her chest was less painful this time. It felt nice to remember good things she did while she was in good health, and not only her last few moments as a weak and ill woman. 

‘’Oh...’’ Lunk said, losing his frown. ‘’I’m sorry I....’’  
‘’Don’t worry, you couldn’t know. ‘’ She said, cursing the awkward silence that came after. After a moment she cleared her throat. ‘’ So... the kiss. What was that all about. ‘’ 

Lunk chuckled and grabbed her by the waist, stopping her from walking. With only one arm he made her turn so they would face each other. 

‘’Just needed to tell them what’s mine..’’ he said with a sly smile. His lips went on that small spot on her neck that always made her shiver and hunger for him.  
‘’What’s yours hmmm’’ She giggles, sighing. It was hard keeping her basket straight in her hand. ‘’We should go see Nakia before the sunset, ‘’ she said without any desire to do so. All she wanted right now was to kiss Lunk and ravage him with her lips.  
‘’On our way home then.’’ he agreed, biting slightly her skin and grabbing her ass. 

It was rough and a bit rustic, but she liked the way he was possessive right now. Maybe getting Lunk jealous a bit was not a bad thing. 

As predicted, Eliot and Quentin became regular customers. At the farm, there was a speculation game on how long they would stay there before leaving or getting mad. They all gave them more or less until the cold season. Which was a few months away. Arielle didn’t bid tough, not only because they were good customers and paid well, but from the small talk she was having with them each week she started to genuinely like them. 

The harvest was almost over and most of their year supply had to be stored for winter as jars, pies, and other delicacies. So when she was not doing her weekly walk, Arielle was in the kitchen, backing and cooking all day. It was the first time she was doing it with her mother and she was terrified that customer would see a drop in quality. She didn’t have her skill with dough and felt her marmalade a bit too sweet. But no buyer ever complain so far. Which gave her a bit more confidence in her skill. 

The only problem was that, with all that work plus taking care of the house and meal of the days, Arielle didn’t have any time to spend with Lunk anymore. She was so exhausted at night that the idea of sneaking out was not even in her mind. She only went to bed and slept through the next morning without a problem. He said he understood and that he was busy too. Yes, now that the plums were owned by her family he didn’t have to work at the farm technically, but if he wasn’t helping the harvest he was fixing things in both households. The roof was leaking and the chariot wheel had a dent in it. At least they had their weekly walk, where numerous kiss and hidden spots in the forest became the only time they could fool around a bit. 

When the cold season started, Arielle refused to go back to school. Everyone was surprised since she was one of the best in class and did love learning. But she reminded them that without their mother, she was now in charge of the house and there was too much to do. Elias promised her to sneak books for her to read and she gave him a cookie right before dinner as a thank you. Seeing the eyes full of wonders of a ten years old child was something she cherished deeply. 

‘’I will remarry soon ‘elle ‘’ Promised her dad as he started to help her with the dishes. ‘’This shouldn’t be your burden.’’

She gave him a sad smile and shook her head. 

‘’Ma' just died a few months ago, you don’t have to be ready yet. ‘’ She said plunging her hand in the last of the water she had drawn from the well that day. ‘’Plus I think it's time for me to get out of the books and start to learn how to be a housewife. ‘’ 

At her age, most girls were already married or would be within the year. Her dad smile widens and had this mischievous air that all her brothers had as well. 

‘’Getting ready for Lunk?’’ He suggested.  
‘’Alright! I’m done!’’ Arielle said raising her hand in the air and voluntary splashing her father with soap water. She was not having this conversation. Nope. Nope. Nope. ‘’ I’m going to the well and get water for a bath. ‘’

It was nice to see her father laugh and hear their joy blooming in the room. It had been a long time since it happens for him. 

‘’Do you think they know about the cold season?’’ Lunk said as they were walking toward The Cottage, Arielle fixing her hair after a long moment of lust against a tree in the wood.  
‘’It’s not that cold here, and I think they know how to dress,’’ Arielle said, a bit puzzled. How can someone not know that when the air gets colder you dress properly? They were strange and sometimes had expression she didn’t understand, but it didn’t mean they were that much clueless.  
‘’I meant the selling season. Aren’t we starting to come less often at the beginning of next full moon? ‘’  
‘’Oh!’’ she exclaimed thinking, ‘’ you are right they are new around here. We should tell them’’

She kissed his cheek and he grinned. At the farm, people were talking about Lunk muscular body but what she liked the best was how considerate he could be toward others. Those small gestures were what was making him more than meet the eyes

It was mid-morning when they arrived at The Cottage. Arielle expected to see both men hard at work doing gods knew what with the colored tiles. But instead, she found them soundly sleeping, tangled in each other, a blanket covering them. 

‘’Are they half dressed?’’ Chuckle Lunk quietly as she noticed as well their open shirt and some piece of clothes clearly tossed away.  
‘’I think so. ‘’ She giggles. She bites her lips, not trying to show how handsome they both looked that way. She never saw them without lines of worried on their forehead and sorrow in their eyes. ‘’We should let them sleep. ‘’

She quietly put near them the bags of plum and peaches Lunk gave her. They will pay her next time, she had known them long enough to trust them on that. She looked at them one last time before smiling affectionately, amused at the tableau. She linked her hand in Lunk and they walk away in silence, not wanting to wake up the boys. 

‘’They slept together right?’’ She finally asked when they were far enough.  
‘’Oh yes they did. ‘’ He laughed ‘’They totally did. ‘’


	6. 5- Quentin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quentin dreams of Julia and it start a domino effect

Quentin dreamed of Julia and Margo. But not in the horny kind of way. Now in real life, he had plenty to fill his fantasy. No, He dreamed of his two best friends and the quest. Trying to find Eliot and Quentin -who always had the illusion key- and not finding them. Julia would be logical and look at every scenario. In his dream, Margo had destroyed the entire Physical Kid cottage. Because she was on Earth for some reason only dream logic knows. 

He woke up coated with a layer of sweat despite the night being slightly cold. After catching his breath and reminding himself where he was, he untangled himself from Eliot and left the room quietly. The fire was about to die so he decided to put another log and was about to spend the next few minutes trying to coax it to catch fire but then remembered he could do magic. With the flick of a wrist and two twisted fingers, a perfectly warm fire was now flaming. Quentin decided to sit on the ugly couch not far from the warmth and closed his eyes. 

The images of Julia and Margo were fading. The smile Julia had, that line on Margo’s forehead when she gets an idea, their voice. He didn’t even remember them in dreams. Christ, it wasn’t even two year and he was starting to forget them. Sighing he put his palm against his eyes to stop the tears that he felt coming into his eyes. He tried to bury deep down this mind-numbing fear that he will never see them again. It has been so long already and nothing ever happens. Just new patterns that start to make less and less sense. He still can’t believe he agreed to let Eliot draw a penis with them yesterday.

He only realized he fell asleep on the couch when Eliot woke him up gently, playing with his hair. The dark-haired man was already dressed and holding a cup of tea, meaning he had breakfast already. 

‘’I didn’t hear you leave last night’’ he said sitting next to Quentin as he rose up and went into a sitting position.  
‘’Nightmare,’’ Quentin grumble, chasing the sleep from his mind. 

He looked at the fire, it was as bright and warm as before. This is why he enjoys magic. Those little everyday miracles. Margo was right about that, he does love magic.  
Margo

His sleepy face turned into a frown and he only felt Eliot pushing him toward his chest. Quentin didn’t want to cry. Not about this. Not again. He’d promise himself he stopped. Yes, he felt a lump of emotion in his throat as big as a tennis ball. 

‘’Do you mind if I go back to sleep a bit?’’ He asks Eliot after taking the time to make sure he wouldn’t sob. 

Eliot kissed him slowly, tenderly. Six months after their first night together and he still had butterflies in his stomach every time he would show affection like that. It was so un-Eliot that it made him feel special. 

‘’Sure, don’t worry. You look like you need a nap anyway.’’  
‘’Is that a polite way to say I look like shit’’  
‘’Yes it is.’’

Both man chuckle and Quentin leaned for another quick kiss before dragging himself into the bed and rolling himself in the cover like a burrito. The butterflies Eliot had given them were now turned into ice pick destroying his stomach and chest. Anxiety rose as he asked himself the question he should not have; what were they? 

Eliot had said that label was not important but it started to feel like it. The quest was getting longer and what had been a chance to finally show his attraction he always had for his best friend, routine crept on them and now kisses, massage and sex were part of their life. If this was not a couple was. What was it? But then Eliot would point out how Lunk ass was cute and said to Quentin that they should try to join them one day. Was he doing that for the joy of seeing him blush or was he really thinking of chasing another man. He had been in a polyamory arrangement before, maybe the idea of multiple partners was now important to him. 

When Quentin heard the door of the house close as Eliot left for the puzzle, the young magicians turned himself against his pillow and let all his sorrow and worries flush over him. He stopped crying only because he was too exhausted for it. Then he slept. 

This sinking feeling in his chest didn’t leave. For three day he barely went out of bed and when he did it’s because Eliot coaxed him to. He refused help to wash because he had been in a state that Julia had to do that once and he knew he wasn’t that bad. No. Things were hard. Life had no meaning. Which was the fucking problem of the quest? Eliot tried to make Quentin talk and tell him what was wrong but the more he was asked the more he closed up. He hated to be that way. He hated the fear in Eliot’s eyes. He hated that he couldn’t even be bothered to have sex right now. 

Quentin was slipping into a depression, and both men in the cottage knew it. But there was no hospital to seek help, no pill to numb you so you stop having emotion, no spell that could fix him. Maybe without his shade, things would hurt less. But then he imagined what kind of person he would be without his soul. Martin had been irreparably corrupt, and Julia had scared him to the point that he went to the fucking underworld to save her. And what did he do there? Accepted the trade for Alice’s shade. Putting him and his problem before hers. Like he did for Brakebills. Like he did for Reynard. Like he was doing yet again. He was leaving her alone, in a world without magic and trying to understand why she had some. With their luck, it was because of a bad thing that would blow up in their face anyway. 

Quentin took a bath again because Eliot asked him to. When he got out the sheets of the bed were drying outside. He asked Eliot if he needed help for dinner. The older man said no, gave him tea and let him go to the couch. While things were cooking, Eliot came next to him and they look at the fire in silence. It was the first time since he knew Eliot that the silence was unbearable. Well not true, there was the morning after he’d cheated on Alice. Fuck he was an asshole. And he was letting Eliot sleeping away because he was scared of doing the same thing. 

‘’Can you work a bit today?’’ Eliot asks slowly, putting his hand on his knee. 

With great shame, Quentin shook his head. Eliot pulled him into a hug, trying to reassure him and the younger boy let himself get surrounded by the unique sent his partner had. One that never failed to make him smile. Even today, a small one had crept on the corner of his lips. 

‘’Can you color tomorrow's pattern? At least you would take some air and it’s not a lot of effort. Then you can go back inside. ‘’

Quentin understood what Eliot did. The same trick Julia always did when he had those harder days; how many times she’d coax him out of the house on the pretense of going to a comic book store or grabbing the new seasonal coffee at Starbucks. 

Julia...

‘’Alright,’’ Quentin said, grabbing the peach Eliot had brought with him. 

He grabbed the stack of paper with all their design, the bowl of pastel and followed Eliot outside. It was surprisingly chilly despite the sky not having one cloud. If this was the cold season the merchant was talking about, he will take it without complaints. He hated snow more than anyone should hate something. It’s wet, cold and you always end up sick. 

‘’El’’ Quentin said as he sat at the table and the older man was about to start doing the first tile of the day. Eliot looked at him over his dark eyelashes and the good kind of butterflies came back into his stomach. ‘’Thanks. ‘’ 

He didn’t know how he could say or show how grateful he was that he was not upset or trying to force him to go faster than he should. He was quite surprised how he was able to do this, never he had hit that low when they were still students in Brakebills and last year, it was desperation that kept him going. Then the quest. Maybe, after all, he was still riding the depression the sacrifice of Alice triggered. He always kept busy so he couldn’t think and stop. And now, they had to. And he fell off a cliff. 

‘’Anytime. ‘’ Eliot simply said with this small smile that he never wore before coming here. It was soft and kind and maybe, just maybe, without his eternal mask that was hiding his emotions. 

But the patience of Eliot had its limit. Arielle had come to The Cottage the day before, which means that it was now the third week that he had not help with the puzzle whatsoever. Neither with the cleaning or the cooking. Last time he felt that low, he’d check himself at the hospital. Now he was looking at a stupid book that was half written and will never finish. He put it back into nightstand next to the bed and sat at the table in front of Eliot.

He had been in a terrible mood this morning and by the sight of his flask next to him, he’d started to drink early today. 

‘’El? ‘’ He asks playing with the fabric of his pants. One thing he did like here was the fashion of the common folks. As comfortable and baggy as he liked.  
‘’Hm?’’ Said Eliot not looking at him, visibly concentrate on a design for the puzzle.  
‘’Why does it matter? ‘’ Quentin ask, deciding to empty his heart of a sorrow he wasn’t strong enough to carry, obviously. ‘’The puzzle, the key, all of this.’’  
Eliot looks up to him with a mixture of anger and surprise. 

‘’Why are we....’’ He scuffs. ‘’Do I need to remind you that magic is gone, Margo is stuck in the kingdom where fairies own our ass and where the smart creature could realize that they can overthrow us and kill every magician in both world.’’  
‘’I know but...’’  
‘’But what Q?’’ Eliot snap, turning sharply.  
‘’Even if we get by some miracle that thing, how the fuck are we going home? And what do we say or do? Hi, guys, it’s been two years I hope you don’t mind. For god sake last time we were there you sent your wife and kid in time square with Todd! They might be dead for all we know. ‘’

There was a cold and harsh silence after Quentin outburst. He broke an unspoken law not to bring up their friend. At least not by name. And especially not as a weapon of mass destruction. Did Quentin thought he was a terrible husband to Fen yes? But never he would have told him. He even tried to understand pulling a Buffy and growing up fifteen years in two months. And yet, he took one of the worst parts of Eliot’s life and turned it against him. 

‘’El I... ‘’ He tried to say but Eliot silenced him with a glance as he grabbed his flask and drank deeply.  
‘’ I know it’s your depression talking right now but this was fucking low Quentin,’’ Eliot whispered

Quentin shivered, Eliot rarely used his full name. This time he took time to think about what he wanted to say as he clenched and unclenched his fist to stop his hand trembling.

‘’What if we are here for years? Decades? Are you ready to waste our life here? For the quest?’’  
‘’Yes. ‘’ 

This certainty from Eliot was as surprising and calming for Quentin. The broken boy who told him magic come from pain, all those years ago, was gone. And for the first time, the younger man saw how good being a king had been for Eliot. Maybes became certainties. 

‘’I need to take some air. ‘’ Eliot said, grabbing the papers and getting up sharply. ‘’One of us as to continue.’’ 

On those hurtful but true words, Eliot left the house. Quentin let out the breath he had been holding for a few seconds and let the sob in his throat get loose. He started to blink rapidly to stop tears from falling. It was not to time to cry and let his emotion win. If he does, he will never be able to go talk to Eliot and try to fix this mess of a thing

When Quentin got out of the house, Eliot had placed the tile in pile around the large square and he was now looking at the same crumple drawing he was doing earlier. 

‘’El. All I meant was...’’  
‘’We can't just throw away all this time we've invested.’’ Said Eliot angrily. There was an undertone of betrayal that made feel Quentin even more awful that he felt before. ‘’You want to live your life? Live it here.’’  
‘’What is that supposed to mean? ‘’ Quentin said, trying not to get his emotion boiling again.  
‘’You know exactly what that means.’’ Said Eliot turning his back and shoving the papers on the table. 

Quentin wanted to cry. To scream. To punch. To cast a spell. To explode. There was too much emotion at once. Anger, despair, confusion, solitude. He couldn’t handle them. He couldn’t do anything. Not even try to understand what his best friend was trying to tell him. So he did what he always did before. He pushed down this pile of anxiety rising in his chest and closed himself. He was just overall the drama.

Just to piss off Eliot even more. Just to prove a point. Just because he could. Quentin kicked a pile of tile that fell all over. 

‘’Oops’’ he said with a nonchalant shrug.

Seeing the rage in Eliot's eyes was all he wanted, he went back inside the house and buried himself in the bed, wondering how to stop feeling this low and pathetic. If he could rip his shade right now, he would. It would make damage, but it wouldn’t hurt so bad. 

When the sun was setting down, Eliot didn’t come back. Nor when it was time for dinner. Quentin tried not to worry, to give him space and to remind himself that the guilt and deep emptiness he was feeling was all he deserved after what he did to his best friend, his partner, his...what. 

He didn’t want to think of that, not while everything was spiraling into his head. Last time it happened he had let a niffin take control of his body. Lesson learn. He decided to go outside and at least make sure everything was alright but to his great surprise, Eliot wasn’t there. The puzzle was done for the day, the papers neatly stacked. Quentin took a deep breath, feeling his anxiety forming a lump inside his chest. He put his hand in his hair and hope he wasn’t gone to the city in a pub. The last thing he wanted right now was to walk a whole day to find him drunk, high and half asleep on a stool. If he was the reason Eliot was relapsing into self-destroying habits, Quentin would never forgive himself. 

He decided to undo the puzzle, at least it would be done and make him something to do. Despite his hand being busy placing the tiles in color coded pile, the gesture was now too familiar to be mind-numbing. He started to imagine Eliot the way he had been when the whole saga with Mike happened. But this time there was no death threat, no Margo, nothing to remind him that he was going too far. Because let’s face it, Quentin was terrible at it. Maybe Alice was right about him. Maybe he was the monster in all of this story. 

‘’Q?’’ said Eliot voice, visibly surprised. 

This stops the long-haired boy’s mind at once. He looked up, trying to pretend he was not on the edge or crying. Again.

Eliot was accompanied by a girl with a warm brown skin, curly hair and beautiful lips that were curling into a soft smile. 

‘’You did the reset, thank you. ‘’ Said Eliot walking toward him slowly, like he was ready for a bomb to explode at any time. He was the bomb. ‘’This is Nakia.’’ Eliot continued presenting the girl who came to shake his hand. ‘’I think its grand time you see a healer. ‘’


	7. 6- Eliot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being partner with Quentin means a lot of self-questioning. And Eliot does it a lot. Especially when he's waiting to know what the Healer would say

Eliot was smoking outside the house, something that wasn’t a cigarette, nor the kind of drug he used to but it made him calm and the start was shiner. Nakia had been examining Quentin for far too long but if it was what it took to get his best friend back, he was ready to wait until next season. 

He hadn’t planned to talk to Arielle and Lunk yesterday, but when she expressed worry not to see Quentin anymore, he’d admit the low mental health of his partner and how he didn’t know what to do anymore. Arielle suggested him to ask the healer and gave him directions on where to go, but he worried that if he’d go, Quentin would get mad or something. He still remembers the frighten look he’d gave him, years ago, when he admitted to him that he had been hospitalized day before discovering he was a magician. It had been this conversation, honest, vulnerable and strangely too personal, that Eliot understood that Quentin was more than a first-year crush he could bang and leave without any thought. He never could say why he had that gut feeling he always was more.

Well maybe having thirty-nine other life together had bound them in a way even magic couldn’t understand. Didn’t Margo had felt the same about Alice? 

‘’Son of a bitch.’’ he chuckles, realizing that, by living here, they were almost leaving another life. 

They were living their forty-first life while trying to save the fortieth. His head started to hurt and he needed way more wine and harder drug to think about this. He only was saved from his own mind by Nakia slowly coming out of the house, a reassuring smile on her lips, yet having a small frown on her forehead. Extinguishing his smoke with a flick of an eye, Eliot got up and tried not to show the deep heavy ball of worry that he was trying to numb. 

‘’Has he ever been like that before?’’ Nakia asked as he pulled a chair for her to sit at the small table near the puzzle. He sat on the other side nodding, worrying.   
‘’I’ve never seen him that bad, but I know he had before. ‘’  
‘’Melancholia is such a destructive disease.’’ Nakia shook her head and took Eliot hand. He was surprised by the gentleness of her touch while her hand was clearly marked by years of manual labor. ‘’It is not something I can cure, but I know a poultice that could be good for him. It doesn’t fix this permanent aura of sadness, but it will give him the strength to battle it. As long as he’s ready to make the effort. ‘’  
‘’Any help would be welcome.’’ Admitted Eliot who, more than once, had talks with Margo of the idea to give Quentin some antidepressant. Thinking of his best friend made his heart clench heavily and he pushed down the pain to focus on the present. That’s the only way he could face this situation. He didn’t have the luxury to mourn and be sad, especially now.   
‘’I will have it ready as soon as I can. ‘’ The dark skin girl said, getting up and fixing her bag on her shoulder.   
‘’What would be the price? ‘’ Eliot said, raising of his chair as she did. ‘’I don’t mind the cost, just let me know so it is paid back, ‘’

Nakia put a hand on his arm. He rarely saw any Fillorians so tactile in his year as a king. But to be fair, touching a king was not something that was allowed to do. 

‘’With the miracle, you did to my garden? Nothing is due Eliot, consider this me paying you back. ‘’

Eliot tried not to act surprised by this, but when you think of it it made sense that she would feel entitled to him. When she was getting her things ready to go to the cottage, Eliot had noticed her crops being dry and small. Which was surprising because they were decades before Martin fucks things up or that magic disappeared. So he used a charm Josh had given him a lifetime ago in order for his marijuana plants to stay healthy despite the lack of care. He’d try that spell at first when he was a new king in a starving kingdom. Honestly, how could these people not know about fertilizer! Anyhow, as he finished the quick spell, he noticed Nakia looking at his eyes wide and mouth open. Oh right... they had made sure people didn’t know they were magicians in the first month of their time here. Well shit. 

‘’I told you, your discretion is all I need. ‘’  
‘’ and you will have it. As well as Quentin’s poultice. I will make enough to last a month, then I will come back to look at him. ‘’

Eliot smiled kindly and extend his hand to shook hers. He didn’t know how to tell her that growing crops was so less important than Quentin’s mental health. Accepting gift as a king had been easy. But now that he lived among the people, it was hard to accept something he knew took time and efforts. 

‘’Thank you.’’ he simply said before watching her leave.

 

The morning after, Eliot woke up as the light enter the bedroom. He tried to forget that he barely had four hours of sleep and have the will to get up and start the day. But he didn’t have the will. Plus, he felt the body of Quentin wrapped around him, making even harder to pretend he wanted to get out of bed. Blinking slowly, he opened his eyes and the sleepy chocolate eyes of Quentin looking back at him, a small smile on her lips. 

‘’Thank you for yesterday’’ He said pressing his lips on Eliot naked shoulder, curling himself more against him.  
‘’I came inside and you were fast asleep. ‘’ Eliot teased, trying to play it as it was not the big deal that it was. If he recalled his long night conversation with him in the physical cottage, no one ever looked over Quentin’s mental health but Julia and his father.   
‘’Yeah I’m pretty sure she roofied me with her calming drink’’ The long-haired man chuckled, which Eliot followed.   
‘’Damn having known.’’ 

There was a laugh on the corner of Quentin smile that was not there the day before. It was impossible that the poultice worked that well, which meant that maybe, Arielle idea to seek a healer had been a blessing. He should thank her properly next time he saw her. 

‘’I’ll try-’’ Started Quentin but Eliot interrupted him, pulling the young man closer to him.   
‘’I know.’’   
‘’About what I said- ‘’  
‘’Let’s not go back to that alright? ‘’

Quentin kissed him as an agreement and slowly what had been a chaste kiss became long and passionate. Eliot always loves when Quentin bit his lips when they were kissing and it was hard to ignore that they didn’t sleep together for a long time and they were barely clothes. But after a heavy night, like they had, Eliot didn’t know where he stands with him. 

But if something Quentin was good at, it was taking control of that moment, and seeing him like that always made him stop thinking. Fuck he missed his body pressed against him, nearly half climbed up on him, their obvious erection making a bulge in their underwear. 

‘’Now how can I be forgiven,’’ Quentin said on Eliot's lips as he straddles the older man. Eliot moaned.  
‘’ You don’t have to -’’ He couldn’t stop because he felt the bulge of his underwear hitting Quentin’s ass and oh god he didn’t have sex for too long if he was reacting like this.  
‘’I think I do. ‘’ continued Quentin, pulling out if thin hair silk scarves that were supposed to be a fashion statement, but were used rather differently by both men. 

Only Quentin was able to make him beg like this before ridding him to oblivion. 

The potion Nakia gave them was not an instant miracle, but it did make Quentin get out of bed and, even if he needed many naps in a day, it was nice to have someone to do the puzzle with again. Honestly, after this, if he could never see those five colors again, he would be a happy man. It was like that time he’d had a whole summer wearing red and gold, never he was able to wear those two again after. Saturation maximal 

‘’El, I was wondering something’’ Quentin said, one afternoon as he was playing blue tiles next to the yellow ones Eliot was putting. ‘’When we.... well when we fought the other week. You said I should be ready to make a life here, what did it mean?’’  
‘’You know what it means’’ Said Eliot, frowning. Quentin had this annoying habit to come back to that night while he was trying to forget about it. But he didn’t want to fight about their last fight so he focused on the tiles instead of the annoyance. 

‘’Frankly... I am not sure.’’

Eliot raised his eyes to look at Quentin’s. He saw his brain turning ideas and scenarios that would end up not being good. It was never too good to let him think too much about something. So he sighs and grabbed the flask not far from him, drinking a nasty fillorian liquor that burned his throat but made his emotions and own thoughts numb for a while. He gave it to the boy next to him when he gave him a look.   
‘’If I asked you where you see yourself in ten years, I know the answer would be having kids and a family. ‘’Eliot said, raising a hand to stop Quentin from answering. ‘’ Don’t even try to deny it Q you are predictable on that part of your life. And it’s fine. But there is a part of the equation I can’t give you.’’  
‘’But...I love you’’   
‘’I love you too but that was not the point’’  
Thank god he had the flask back so he could drink another numbing sip again. Because he didn’t want Quentin to see his face. Was that idiot boy realizing that was the first time they put a label on their feeling? And Eliot had promised himself not to fall in love again. Not after Mike. And there he was not thinking even twice to reciprocate the love his best friend just shove in his heart. Fucking Coldwater. He was good at that kind of things. 

The sip was longer than usual then Eliot just grabbed Quentin’s hand to let him know that this moment was not unnoticed, but now wasn’t the time to talk about it. Quentin squeezed it back. 

‘’I meant....’’ Eliot said, looking back at Quentin, finding it hard to look at him in the eyes. ‘’ Fillory is more open to polyamory than Earth, and it wouldn't be my first relation like this. I am open to the idea if you are.’’

Quentin looked at him and blinked a moment. It was clear that he didn’t saw it coming while Eliot had come to this revelation months ago. Wasn’t it the best solution after all? Quentin wanted a family, adoption in Fillory was not something he wanted to look into and if it took a girl to make him happy and stay here with him, he was more than happy to share. One thing he was sure, what he had with Quentin was too strong for another relation to break it apart. He was not scared on that front. At all. 

Pulling out their linked hands, Quentin grabs his hair and laugh awkwardly a moment, visibly on the edge of a panic attack. Oh fuck. That didn’t go how he wanted it to happen. Eliot gave him the flask and Quentin drank heavily, which tipped him on how freaked out he was. 

‘’H- How can you be so composed about it?’’ Quentin said in his small panicking laugh he was so good at. ‘’ Ready to sacrifice yourself and your life to solve a puzzle and make this thing between us work? How...’’

Eliot stopped him by putting both his hand around his face so they could both focus on each other’s eyes. He’d expect that question, and frankly, he only found the answer not long ago. It was one of the reasons he hadn't brought the idea yet. 

‘’Because I had a year to accept that I will never see Earth and some of my friend again. ‘’Eliot said, caressing Quentin’s cheek with his thumb. ‘’It is a mourning I did back in Whitespire with a lot of wine and Adderall. ‘’  
‘’I didn't think of that’’ Quentin said after a moment, biting his lips.   
‘’That's why I am not pressuring you to do anything.’’ He said leaning to kiss him slowly because fuck when he had those eyes and biting his lips he couldn’t control himself. ‘’Just think about it m’kay?’’

Quentin answered the kiss back. They had to finish the puzzle with the moonlight and small lantern since they took a long break to fuck, eat, then make love. The latter had been a new one in their dynamic couple. One he didn’t hate at all. 

The warm season came back as well as the weekly traveling merchant instead of the monthly visit. Which was nice and put some variety on the table. But what made Eliot even more even more in a good mood what Quentin confused and scared face as he worked him up from a nap. The poor thing was panicked and had pulled another chair next to his, the puzzle next to them but forgotten. When he’d finish his story, Eliot was laughing so hard tears were in his eyes. 

‘’Wait you invited her on a date here?’’ he laughed as Quentin groaned in his hand.   
‘’I don’t know? ‘’ mumble Quentin, reddening every passing second. ‘’I panicked and didn’t know what to say and she seemed sad and...’’

He looks at Eliot with horror which only made the latter laugh even harder. 

‘’ Oh god do you think she thinks its a date’’ said Quentin, terrified of what he just told to Arielle.


	8. 7 - Arielle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arielle wonders if Quentin had asked on a date or not

‘’Wait do you think it’s a date?!’’  
‘’I don’t know’’

Arielle burred her hand in her face groaning while her sister was laughing lovingly. Both in the kitchen preparing dinner while the two youngest were doing their homework at the kitchen table. Delilah had come every night to help her since she learned her break up with Lunk, and if she saw it as an act of kindness, now she was starting to wonder if something had happened with her husband or his brother. Gods, the last thing she wanted was that nasty affair causing more pain than it had already. 

‘’Do you want it to be a date?’’ asked her sister, cutting the carrots with expertise. 

Her hair seemed even redder since she got pregnant and there was a spark in her eyes that had been lost at the death of their mother. 

‘’Honestly… I don’t know. ‘’ She sighed and stop pretending she was doing something while her brain and mind where completely elsewhere. ‘’I mean, he is nice and funny and kind….’’  
‘’and cute?’’  
‘’yes, that too. ‘’

Both girl giggle and Arielle felt like they were thrown back in times when they were little girls sharing secrets in the barn in their extra-secret-hideout. It was a big stack of hay but adults left them alone when they were there. 

‘’What makes you hesitate then? ‘’  
‘’Isn’t too soon? ‘’ the young girl asked, playing nervously with her braid. ‘’It’s not even been a week and-’’  
‘’and Lunk wasn’t exclusive with you for weeks! Who cares if you get into flirting again!’’ 

That reminder was still leaving a bitter taste in Arielle’s memory. Having discovered that he had been with other girls was already hard for her to swallow, but when his pathetic excuse was that they never talked about exclusivity and that she had been so busy lately, she would have strangled him if he wasn’t twice her size. She always knew Lunk was not the man of her life. At least, she knew she was not in love with him the way Delilah was with his brother. But she thought their relationship was based on more than peaches and sex. Apparently, she didn’t mean much for him. 

‘’You know there are contrasting principles when it comes to courting for men and for women. He’s called a lover, I would be called a whore. ‘’

Realizing her words, Arielle checked up to see if the kids had heard her at the table, but their lack of reaction to such a nasty word was proof enough they were not listening at all. She grabbed her sister cutting and put them in boiling water, blushing at her outburst. 

‘’A date doesn’t mean sleeping with him ‘elle, but I get the point. ‘’ Sigh her sister, crossing her arm. ‘’Look, if it wasn’t that, would you go?’’ 

Arielle took her time to stir the cooking vegetable, thinking. That was a good question. She did found Quentin handsome the first time she saw him and it had driven Lunk so jealous, and meanwhile, he was doing the same things with one of the Jaril twins from the sheep farm. She’d been heartbroken when she discovered it. But now her sadness had transformed in anger and resentment. She wasn't destroyed by this, but mostly mad at herself for going in so deep and not having noticed anything.

‘’I think I would.’’ She finally said looking at her sister. ‘’ I mean… he’s kind of mysterious and I like to know him more. ‘’

Delilah put her hand on her shoulder, looking at her with the eyes a big sister has only for the youngest people. 

‘’Then go! Have fun. Enjoy! You deserve it. And if you don’t want ‘pa to know I can make up an excuse.’’

Both girls smiled and now Arielle was blushing from excitement at the idea of an actual date. She never had one and, let’s face it, after all this, it felt nice to know other people could have an eye on her.

This became the longest week of her life. She’d agree to see him after she was done doing her sells, which mean she would be there for dinner time, an hour or two before sundown. She was trying not to make a big event out of this, but after talking to her sister it had been harder not to. 

She had never been asked on a proper and formal date and she was not even sure if it was one. Would Eliot be there as well? Quentin had asked while Eliot was napping so she will have to make sure he knew about it. The last thing she wanted was to be the unaware accomplice of another love triangle. Lunk might be about having multiple partners, but the fact that they never talked about it and he had express jealousy by her simple curiosity over meeting Quentin and Eliot had led her to believe he had wanted to be monogamous. It wasn’t the fact that he was seeing other people that bothered her more than the fact that he didn’t tell her. That had a taste of cheating more than if she’d been aware. 

Anyway, it’s not like she was going there to start something with Quentin and Eliot, or just Quentin. She needed to go there not expecting anything else than learning more about these curious men who were tirelessly doing an impossible puzzle. 

Oh god, what would she wear? How do you look put together without being obvious to everyone -the boy included- that you did it in case it was an actual date. Groaning under her breath, she told herself that she would go ask to advise to her sister after she was done with laundry. Gods, why was she acting that way? She never had before. 

Time should have past fast; between helping the two youngest with school, all the household chore and the fruits that were about to be harvested for the first time this season, life at the farm was chaotic. Yet, time was slow and Arielle kept being distracted. had to undo a large part of her sewing because she’d been too absent-minded and had sewed the shirt sleeve with the collar. Her father had asked if she was alright after she’d almost burn the dinner but she blamed her recent break up with Lunk as the reason. 

Even if he never told her, Arielle knew he’d wish for a wedding between Lunk and her by the end of the year, and this whole thing had to stop potential plan he had for the farm. So it was a bit uncomfortable for him to talk about the recent breakup. The only thing he told her about it was that he respected her choice and he didn’t have to do the walks with her anymore. Which was all she hopped. The last thing she’d wanted was to be forced into an unwanted arranged marriage for the benefit of her father’s plan for the future. Life as a farmer was hard and tiresome, but at least you had the choice to love who you wanted. That had always been one of the benefits of a much humble life. 

When the day came, she took her morning to draw water from the well and warm it in order to make a bath where she scrubbed every inch of dirt she could find. It was a bit useless since it seemed that it was in her pore, but at least she was clean and wouldn’t smell like the family barn. Delilah had shown her how to do the simple twisted braided ponytail their mother use to do to them for the proper occasion. It was simple enough that it didn’t look like she tried too hard, yet it was elegant and framed her face nicely. She wore her favorite dress and long shirt -the weather was still too cold to wear short sleeve- and went downstairs to grab her basket. 

Her father was filling it with the week order of three houses and smile warmly when he saw her. Her two brothers were preparing the order for the houses they were crossing on their way to school so she wouldn’t have to do the walk there. 

“Woa ‘elle, you look pretty today,” said Elias, grinning at her. She kisses his cheek and her father’s  
“is that a way to say I don’t look pretty all the time”  
“uh ho kid, don’t answer that, it’s one of the woman favorite trap, “ her father laughed “whatever you answer it won’t be right”

She pulled her tongue and joint her family into the laughter before sending her youngest brother to school, reminding them to hide the money they will be given in their shoes. If anyone would see them with it at school, they could be targeted and no one wanted that. 

With Lunk not working with her anymore, walking the path to every customer was now taking twice as long. She didn’t have the arm strength to carry as many peaches and plum than he did. So she’d separate her run in three, coming back to fill her basket and store the money and exchanged goods she had in return. So what took half a day now took almost all of it. But this time she wouldn’t come back directly after seeing Nakia, her last client on the run, because she would go to The Cottage. She’d decided to take her old route and go through Mrs. Mahar field and do a loop in order to finish with Quentin and Eliot. 

So she started what had become a routine now and went to the first house. Time passed slower without having company but it was better than having to see Lunk more than she had to. She let herself hums songs and ballad, not wanting to impose her terrible voice to anyone nearby. And if the time had been slow during the whole week, now it went so fast that she almost forgot to be anxious about going to The Cottage. She’d just said goodbye to Nakia and was now going toward her final destination and it took her a few seconds to remember everything. She made sure to fix her hair and her outfit before continuing her walk, groaning inwardly at her behavior. 

“Think fast,” she said as she arrived near Eliot who was bent over in front of another mosaic. As she threw a plum he looked up and grin catching it just in time.   
“Thanks, I am starving,” said the black-haired man as he bit into the fruit before he turned toward the small house. “Q she’s here, moves your ass “ 

Arielle let him call Quentin and put her fruits on the table near the puzzle, as always they’d put the payment and were too generous. But she learned long ago it was no use to refuse or ask for less. She grabbed the small bag so full it could barely close and put it in her empty basket not sure if she should grab it or let it there since she was staying.

“H...Hi,” Said Quentin as he opens the door and grinned at her. 

He too had clearly taken time to clean and dress. She used to see him in comfortable clothing and a half done ponytail, but now his hair was down and he was wearing a more pair of pants with a shirt that only noble and merchant would wear. He looked more like a nobleman than a boy doing the same puzzle for two years. Her mouth dried and her heart started to beat fast at the sight. Gods he was good-looking.

“I uh… I’ll go get the stuff hold on” He said before going back home and she notice how nervous he seemed to be. With the way he was dressed she now knew that this was actually a date. 

“You came later than usual,” Eliot said, getting up from the ground. 

Right, if it was a date, she needed to clear a lot of question before Quentin was back. 

“I can’t carry as much anymore since I am alone, I have to make a few backs and forth to the house. I am sorry for my delay “ She said as the pre-rehearsed answer she’d been saying all afternoon to her client.   
“It’s alright, Q was about to die of a heart attack but it was a good show to watch,” Eliot said, laughing and finishing his plum. 

Q must be Quentin. It was intimate yet precise. She wonders how he came up with it. 

“Hm… before all of this, I just want to be sure. “Arielle said, strangely forgetting how to talk suddenly. Those boys were making her act in ways she has never been before. Maybe that was part of the charm. But right now it was infuriating “I just want to be sure it’s fine with you.. about him… I mean I know he asked me while you were sleeping so...”

Eliot had a warm smile that makes his eyes wrinkle a bit and put a hand on her shoulder. 

“ It’s more than okay, believe me,” He reassured.

She smiled back at him, feeling a weight on her stomach she didn’t realize she had. It felt like a ton had been lifted from her. 

“I don’t want to ruin thing between your husband and you. I just wanted to be sure. No secrets”   
“Husband?” Eliot repeated with a surprised expression. 

Great, she already put her foot in her mouth and it was not even an hour into the date. 

“Oh sorry, I assume… your ring.” She said pointing at Eliot left finger where a simple silver band was. “Jewelry on this finger usually mean you are married. “ 

Eliot looked at his hand and blinked a few seconds like he never saw that ring before. His face was starting to lose his color and Arielle wanted to rewind time.

“No .. you’re right. Q and I are not… It’s complicated. But not married. “

She couldn’t ask more question because Quentin arrived with a large basket and a blanket. Immediately she understood that they were going into a picnic and the idea was more than wonderful. She rarely does them and when it happens, it was mostly in their orchard, during the harvest season. She let Eliot go to him and she might have purposefully fixed her dress and look away as both men kissed goodbye, then Quentin came next to her with a smile that made her forget the awkward talk she just had with Eliot. 

“Ready?” He asked giving her his arm.   
“Ready.” She said putting her hand on it like they do in court. 

This new side of Quentin intrigued her as much as it made realize she barely knew the man she was now walking with.


	9. 8- Quentin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quentin is finally on his accidental date with Arielle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks Jasper for inspiring this chapter, you are so good at poking my brain

The only reason why Quentin was not screaming from the top of his lung or uncontrollably shaking was that he’d smoke something to calm him down with Eliot an hour ago. They both knew a panic attack was eminent and it had been already hard all week to drag himself out of bed, this probably-date with Arielle was nothing good for his nerve. Not that he was not nervous now, but it was a numbed and tone down version of the panic he really felt. His heart was hammering so loud he felt it was raising out of his chest like in cartoons. His hand was moist and it was a blessing that courtship in Fillory was more incline to present his arm than his hand.

He couldn’t help notice that Arielle seemed a bit better put together than the usual, which reassured him in some sense. But now there was an awkward silence and he knew he had to break it but he was not the best at this. Usually, he let Eliot do the talking. Shit. Think Coldwater. Think.

“So, where are we going?” Finally asked Arielle and Quentin wanted to smack himself mentally for not even having thought of that.  
“Oh uh. Well, uh...”

Smooth. Real. Fucking. Smooth. He cleared his throat.

“We are not far from the rainbow river. And it’s a shame that I went there only once. I know it’s the best at sunset, so I figured we could eat there and see?”

The rainbow river always had been one of his favorite part of Fillory, even if it only appears twice in the books. Just before the water went into the great salt river, there was a small of the land that had been enchanted by dryads -or elves, the myth wasn’t clear on that- years before the human claimed the land. The magic that was once at this place stayed and soaked through the soil and, with time, the bed of the river. Tuned to Fillory’s inner magic, it always showed different colors depending on the weather, political climate, phase of the moon and health of the good springs. For years now, Fillorians and the magical creature had tried to crack the code and the meaning of the colors. No one ever succeeds. Though, it was now in fillorian’s lore that some color meant something. He could never remember them and, once again, he mourns the fact that he’ll never have access to his Fillory and Further books ever again.

“Oh! What a lovely idea” Exclaimed Arielle, her eyes bright and her smile spreading. “I never took time to go even if it’s not far from the farm. “

There was a pinch of pride that not only she liked the idea but that Eliot didn’t even help him for the location of the picnic. He did help with the food though.

“Do you always work at the farm or you get to go out sometimes?” He asked, just because he needed the conversation to go forward and, honestly, he was wondering what kind of life a peach-selling girl could have.

She started to explain her routine at the farm; taking care of the house and baking goods to sell while the men were either in the field or in school. The chaos of a full house and to be the only girl now that her sister was gone and her mom died. She explained how she ended up starting to do the traveling sell because her mother had been too sick at some point but, in fact, it had been a blessing. Ember and Umber had prepared her to fully take the task when the sickness took her mother away.

The simple mention of Ember and Umber gave him chills. Not only, before this morning, he’d forgotten that they were still alive at this time, but they had found a way to mess up their lives once again.

_The only reason why Quentin had been out of bed this morning instead of letting anxiety consume him, was the many kisses from Eliot and the promise that doing something would help him take his worry away for at least a few hours. So he got out of bed. Drank the horrible potion Nakia made him drink to help his mood and grabbed the clothes Eliot had chosen for him. The neat pile of black fabric on the chair next to him was for tonight and he still thought it was too much, but he let Eliot dressed him for his date because he had no sense of style. Which he couldn’t argue about. Plus, it made his partner happy so why not._

_They ate breakfast over the new design of the day, an abstract blob of green and blue in the four corners with the rest as the filling. If this was the beauty of life, he would eat his own shoe. But hey, better trying than whining about the impossibility of it being right. At least, that what he had to remind himself every day._

_The work was monotonous but did help him ease his nerve as he went into the routine of placing tile after tile, talking with Eliot or drinking water. If his life was a movie, there would be a fast-forward montage of all the days that looked like this exact one._

_Until a shrilled and too well-known voice boomed behind him._

_“Children of Earth, finally we get to meet”_

_Quentin saw Eliot frozen in shock before turning his head toward the voice. It wasn’t one visitor but two. Two Gods. Ember and Umber in flesh and fur. Fucking alive and breathing, decades ago from being chased by Martin Chatwin and dying on the floor of Whitespire._

_“Holy shit,” Quentin said, back to sit next to Eliot who was still holding a tile in mid-air._

_“As much as our waste can be qualified as holy, this is not why we are here.” Cackled Ember._   
_“It is an Earth saying” Sigh Umber, visibly not wanting to be here._   
_“Bah! You ruin the fun of a good joke. “_

_Both Gods finally turned their attention to Eliot and him and for the first time, he got scared of them. Did they know he was the reason for their death and were coming to kill him before it happens? Why of all days, they decided to come today?It’s been nearly two years since Fillory became their home._

_“So, you two had caused us quite a headache” Said Umber as Ember huffed, visibly disagreeing with the statement. “Not only you still haven’t given up on the puzzle, but discovering that you are from the future is worrisome. We already have the Watcher Woman roaming between the cracks of time, we don’t need two more magicians poking into it. “_   
_“Wait Jane Chatwin isn’t even queen yet. “ Pointed out Eliot, frowning. “How could you know about the Watcher Woman.“_   
_“Because she does goes beyond her time from time to time.“ Said gleefully Ember, visibly loving his play on word._   
_“We have no desire to do like her and terrorize Fillory. “ Said Quentin, annoyed. He knew his anger was unjust and mostly hiding more complex feeling about seeing the Gods, but it was not the time to think about that right now. He’ll over-analyses his emotion when he has time._   
_“That is yet to be proven.” Pointed out Umber who crossed his arm. “We have left you alone because right now you are not causing trouble. But things are changing and we need a talk. And by talk I mean you listen and obey what we will say”_

_Quentin took Eliot’s hand when he saw the older boy raising an eyebrow, glint of defiance in his eyes. Even before he’d been a king, Eliot rarely complies with authority._

_“What my discourteous brother is trying to say, is that if you come from the future, you must know that a large war is about to come. We are days before the tension becomes too intolerable and Loria attack Fillory like they threaten. And we would like that two magicians like you do not interfere into this. I’ve spent years into this chaos and I can’t have you ruining it by going to tell everything the winner needs to know in order to win.”_   
_“I’m still betting on Loria” Mumble Umber_   
_“Wait” Said Quentin, digging into his knowledge of the history of the place. “If there is a war and Queen Yana is on the throne....is this the War of the sacred Source?!“_

_He wished he had his Fillory and Further book for times like this, he only had a vague memory of what happened but he knew enough about it. Queen Yana would win and Loria will lose most of his access to the magic wellspring, they would only get enough to survive while Fillory would thrive under magic. Yana would die from a battle wound a few weeks after, letting the throne vacant until Martin arrived. His head started to hurt when he realized that Idri and Ess had wanted to get back what this war has deprived them._

_“From the dead-fish face you are giving us, I think you know that it is this war. Though it is not called that way yet. Umber said._   
_“I like the sound of it, let's make sure it sticks”_

_Eliot squeezed Quentin’s hand who realize he was trembling from head to toe. Quentin closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to stop the flow of information he knew about one of the bloodiest war Fillory will ever know._

_“We are on a road towards nowhere and barely leave the area, why are you coming about this. And why now?” Eliot said, making Quentin open his eyes._  
 _“Well, said Ember with a grin, we didn't care_ of _you as you were total hermits, but we all know today our dear Quentin have a date with a fillorian. Who has a brother that is now marching toward the border of_ Loria. _“_

_Quentin’s blood froze in his vein as his heart drop._

_“And we don’t want him to open his mouth to her, to anyone of her family or even anyone from this whole world. You are to keep your mouth shut about this”_

_Eliot and the two Gods looked at Quentin, expecting an answer. The flow of horrible information he had to manage to stop was now overpowering his brain and the young magician felt unable to speak or even move. He was now battling against an anxiety attack and was loosing second by second. Within a second Eliot understood and took over the conversation, putting a hand on his back and rubbing it gently._

_“And what do we get for keeping silent?”Eliot asked_   
_“What do you get?!” Exclaimed Umber, indignant._   
_“You can’t kick us out, otherwise why would you come and ask for this. Your moto is to send away Child of Earth the moment they are not good in your plans. So I have no idea why, but you are stuck with us in your land.“_

_Eliot whole body was now rigid and proud, assuming the stance he once had when he was the High King of Fillory and had to remind the court of his power over them._

_“So why would we do it we don’t get anything in return?” He continues, his voice lowered, confidence. The one of the High King._

_It snapped Quentin out of his frozen terror. Not having heard it for two years. He tried to get the same strength than him, grateful of the other man presence at this moment._

_“Uhh” Huffed Umber and Ember rolled his eyes. “Fine fine. We will make sure this house is never attacked or seen by the enemy. Stay around this.... house, and nothing from the war will harm you.“_   
_“And Arielle” Quentin heard himself said, his brain still in a frozen swamp and yet, talking without thinking. “Nothing shall happen to her or her family”_   
_“With a brother at war, this is an impossible request. “ Said Umber_   
_“Then extend the protection to her farm.” Countered Eliot. “No one near this house or their farm will be harm by the war. And we will not say a word of the outcomes”_

_Both Gods look at each other and Umber shrug, rolling his eyes, visibly annoyed. Ember grinned and waved his hand around in four precise movements. Nothing had visibly changed, but both magicians could feel some strong magic at work around them. Magic from Gods._

_“Done,” Ember said, “We’d appreciate if the girl doesn’t know about the deal, the last thing I want is a crowd of people at our temple begging for the same protection”_

_Quentin nodded and Eliot frowned but agreed as well._

_“Great. Now if you excuse us, we are needed elsewhere._ Ta ta _” Said Ember before disappearing along with his brother._

As the two God exited, Quentin anxiety washed over him and he ended up vomiting in the bush while Eliot held his hair, drinking from his never emptying flask.

The finger of Arielle tightening around his arm and her delighted gasp made him come back to reality, not having realized he had been on the edge of another panic attack by the simple memory of the two Gods this morning. But the view in front of him erased everything for a moment as he took the sheer beauty of it.

The water was all the shade of the rainbow for a few moments before turning into indigo, then purple, then red, then back to indigo. Apparently settling to this color, the river continues its course like nothing out of the ordinary was happening to it. The meadow in front of them had the greenest grass he’d ever seen and the few flowers were a shade of deep purple and bright yellow dots. He felt like he was watching the Avatar movie or something.

This place was beyond everything he’d seen in Fillory. As they walk near the water, he

‘’I’m trying to remember what Indigo is supposed to mean. ‘’Said Arielle, laughing lightly. ‘’ But the only rhyme I can find is snow and throw which I hope its neither. ‘’  
‘’Plow? Foe? Dough? Glow? Crow? ‘’ Quentin said, trying as well to remember. Visibly nothing seemed to click and he couldn’t help to join her laughter.

When they arrived near the river, he put a blanket on the grass and sat with Arielle in silence. Both of them were soaking the beauty of what they were seeing and the lack of conversation was not one that creates awkwardness. It was simply them sharing a moment of wonder together.

He was a bit proud of his idea to come here now.

‘’Can I ask you a question Quentin’ finally said Arielle looking at him  
‘’Yes, of course. ‘’ He said, half happy she started the conversation, half worried about what the question was.  
‘’I’m going to sound insane but... ‘’ She bites her lips as he realized he’d never notice their shade of red and pink. ‘’Are you from this world? ‘’  
‘’W...What?’’

He was expecting something about Eliot, the puzzle maybe or even is age. Not that.

‘’No no nevermind. ‘’ She said, reding by the second. ‘’ I just thought... Well, when I met you, you had strange clothing and you speak differently. And sometime Eliot or you make reference I can’t quite get.‘’

Whoever said farmers only use their brain for working and not thinking was visibly wrong. Who told him that anyway? Probably Tick he always hated commoners.

‘’No... uh,’’ Quentin tucked his hair behind his hear. ‘’ I mean yes. I mean. Eliot and I are not from Fillory, you are right. We come from Earth. ‘’

Arielle's eyes widened and she part opens slightly her lips as her jaw dropped.

‘’It means you are nobility? Well, that explains why you are so well dressed today but.... ‘’  
‘’Nobility?’’ Interrupted Quentin, quite puzzled. She was right but it was a big leap to make.  
‘’ Well, isn’t what we say true? The only children of Earth that come are those meant to be on the throne. I mean Queen Yanna arrived long but... Aren’t you suppose to belong to Whitespire and not a small cottage in the middle of nowhere. ‘’

‘’Well...yes but... It’s more complicated than that. Wait let me open the wine, we will need that if you want to get through the story. ‘’

So as he opens the basket and lay down the meal Eliot had made for them while he’d been considering drowning himself in the bath, Quentin started to explain everything. Well, not everything. Just enough for her to understand without having to confuse her with time travel, losing magic and Brakebills. He told her that Earth was in danger and they were on a quest that had to lead them to the puzzle. He told her that he barely understood how tile could represent the meaning of all life but that they had to try. He told her that they couldn’t go at Whitespire because Yanna was the rightful queen and that if they were to show up, she will lose her position of power as Eliot and he were men, so by law, would be granted more power than her. This part was a total lie, but hearing Margo complain about patriarchy in this world just came handy.

It took him everything not to warn her about her brother. But only wine and the reminder that her house would be protected helped with it.

He had been worried all day about what he would say or do, and here he was, calmly talking about everything, answering her question, laughing along with her. For a split second, Quentin felt something warm in his chest. A spark of happiness that he hadn’t felt for a long time.

The meal had been simple yet delicious, showing off once again Eliot amazing skills to take nothing and make art out of it. This guy was able to do that with every part of his life and that was part of why Quentin was so attracted to him.

Arielle lay down on the covers as he was clearing the leftover, having one of those conformable silence that shouldn’t happen on a first date. Suddenly the young girl pop up on her elbow, her cheek redden by the wine and a large grin on her face.

‘’Wait if you come from Earth, it means you can do magic?’’ She asked, her eyes sparkling at her realization.  
‘’Not everyone on Earth can do magic, but yeah I can. ‘’ He said trying not to swell with pride. Being a magician had been such a life-changing event in his life, but also the deepest anchor he ever had. Having magic back while here felt like a blessing he didn’t earn. ‘’ Eliot too, we try not to use it too much though, people can try to use us for bad things if it’s known. ‘’  
‘’My dad would be the first I am sure. He keeps saying he needs more magic to help the orchard bloom’’ She rolled her eyes which made him smile. ‘’He’s just impatient to get the harvest going. ‘’

Then she started laughing, rolling on her back, looking at the first star of the nights.

‘’Here I am talking about peaches and plums while you have tales of quest and adventures. I must sound boring. ‘’  
‘’You made it sound better than it is. ‘’ Quentin said, lying down next to her, trying not to focus too much on their hand nearly touching. ‘’My quest right now is to do the same damn puzzle every day for the past two years. It’s nothing to find interesting. ‘’  
‘’I find it interesting. ‘’  
‘’And I find your story about your home interesting too. Don’t sell yourself short like that, usually, it's me who do this, you are stealing my job. ‘’

As she laughed, a flock of bird flew into the sky. The colors were dimming as more and more stars were appearing. The air was warmer than it had been in days. Feeling his heart beating out of his chest, he took all the courage he had and linked his hand to hers. He watched her face and saw a smile creeping on her lips as she tightens her grip. His nerve turned into fireworks in his chest. Slowly she turned her head and look into his eyes and at this moment, he knew that he wanted to spend more time with her. She had a way to make him feel calm and not asking anything of him but his presence

‘’That’s the part where you kiss me’’ she finally said with a teasing smile.  
‘’Oh right’’ stumbled Quentin, reddening by her bold statement. It had taken him nearly two hours to gather the courage to take her hand and yet, here she was asking to be kissed.

In Fillory was it improper on a first date? He didn’t know, he didn’t care. He leaned toward her and kissed her softly and quickly. Oh, how he’d miss the taste and softness of a woman’s kiss. Not that anything was wrong with Eliot’s. They were just different. And he liked it. So he kissed her again, and again, and again. Until it was time for her to go home and even then, he’d kissed her a final goodbye after walking her home.


	10. 9-Eliot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliot get some me time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was supposed to be a fun chapter. idk what happen ._.

Chapter 9  
Eliot

When Quentin and Arielle left for their date, Eliot couldn’t help but smile. Even if he’d been a nervous wreck all day, seeing Quentin outside and even smiling was worth every panic attack he had to calm down. He truly hopes that this thing with Arielle, whatever it leads him to, will bring him back from the depressive spiral he had been for months.

Now alone, he decided to indulge in the longest bath he could take, relaxing and appreciating the small time alone. He loved Quentin, but anyone needs their me time. And Eliot loves his me time. It’s only after filling the bath with hot water and putting some scented oils in it that he realized how casually he thought of his love for his lover while he was on a date with another woman. The lack of jealousy made him go get their last bottle of wine and pour himself a tall glass. After a farm, a magical school and an actual castle did he just found that his home was here. In a small shack, a daily task and some great sex on the side.

A few minutes after sinking into the hot water, he let a long and well-deserved sigh. Not wearing any mask, not pretending, nothing but him and wine. It was in those rare solitary moments that he allowed himself to think of Margo, of the Quest, for Brakebills. He knew that if he showed a crack in front of Quentin, he would dig into it until both men were homesick and depress. And what good would it make? He was being more confident than he really felt, to be honest, part of him thought that this puzzle was impossible and they would die trying. But if it’s what it took to bring back magic, would he be able to give his life away? Before the answer would have been so easy. A definitive yes of a suicidal alcoholic. But now, the answer was more complex. Most likely a yes, but out of love and care for so many people he never wanted to care about. Hell, he knew he’d do it if it helps his kingdom to be better again.

Theses gloomy thought lead him to a point he never allowed to think, even when he was alone: Fen and Fray. But Arielle had pointed out that he was still wearing his wedding ring and it had given him a punch in the heart he didn’t expect. He’d become used to the ring and rarely felt it, but to be reminded of its presence and the vow he’d made to a stranger in order to save Quentin form dying… If anything, this ring was now the promise that he’d ruin the simple but happy life of a girl whose father was probably not born yet. He had the awful impression that now, the silver ring was burning him. Slightly drunk and emotionally unprepared to deal with such feelings, he simply let a wave of guilt and panic wash over him. It took him a few tries and some of the essential oil applied directly to his skin, but he managed to get the ring out of his touch.

Then he did something he didn’t let himself do in two years; he curled on himself and cried.

 

The entire bottle of wine was finished when he calmed down and he made sure his reflection in the mirror didn’t look like the mess he had been. Alright, his eyes were red but it should go before Quentin return, plus it wouldn’t be the first time he saw them like that. Last resort, he could blame the drug. Which he desperately needed. Nothing strong though. Even without being a king, he knew the stakes were too high for him to go in the spiral again. He still wondered if Fen had confided in Margo all of those nights that withdrawal at took over him and how she had to help him without seeking any outside help. She had promised never usher a word, but after everything, he wouldn’t even be mad if did. But he knew his wife -ex-wife?- too much to know that she would keep those horrid moments to her grave.

Thinking of her made him light the joint event even faster. He needed to forget her and put her back in the fog he didn’t allow himself to look or think of. It will be easier now that the ring was in the bottom of his dresser away from any accidental finding. Hating the smell of fillorian herbs, he decided to finish everything outside, grabbing his empty cup of wine; if they didn’t have any, he’d use that spell that cast crappy wine he found in the first year. The trick had been cool at parties the party, but it tasted as good as his first try of fillorian champagne. The horror.

Sitting at the table and letting his buzz mix with his drunkenness, he let his mind wander to a place he loved reaching; the too numb to remember what you think kind of place. That’s when he saw Arielle’s basket with the peaches she got for them. With a fond smile, he took them and bit in one, wondering if he’ll ever be tired of eating them. He hadn’t been in two years. Anyway with the size of her basket, no wonder she took all day to do what she could do with Lunk in a few hours. The handsome asshole had been carrying most of her load from what he saw. Frowning, he put the joint between his lips and tug the rope container toward him, half a drunken idea in his mind.

If only he could remember the spell he’d done for his never emptying flask. He had adapted it with Margo from her endless extension spell she had found for her purse. If he could do this to the basket, it would save the girls hours of useless back and forth. With his clean mind he would have probably remember and did the calculation within half an hour. But his mind was everything but clear so it took him most of the night. But leaning into a magical problem and doing some calculation of the variable was putting him in a good mood. Which surprised him. He had hated every homework he had to pretend to do at Brakebills, and yet he was enjoying applying the calculation for a sensory extension charm. Living with Quentin made him a nerd.

He only accepted his spell was successful when he manage to put a chair inside the basket and pull it out without problem. The image wasn’t worth his unstoppable fit of laughter, but right now, the idea of putting Quentin on that chair and in that basket was the funniest thing he ever thought. He took a piece of paper and, when his hand were stable enough he took upon himself to explain to Arielle what he’d done, hoping that Quentin was wise enough to tell her that he was a magician on a first day. This is not the kind of thing you should hide for a long time to anyone you date. At least, in Fillory. At least, in this situation.

But Quentin inside that basket though.

Arielle and Quentin found him still sited at the table, in a second fit of laughter. Despite his tears, he did notice how their hands were linked.

‘’Next time, I’m making you a proper dinner’’ Eliot offered as he gave her back her goods she’d left for the time of the date.  
‘’Y..Yeah, good idea. ‘’ Nodded eagerly Quentin which made both Eliot and Arielle smile with fondness.  
‘’The meal was already lovely. Thank you ‘’  
‘’At least Q didn’t pretend he did it, it’s great,’’ Eliot said winking at Quentin who was grinning like the fool he was.

He took the soft hand of the farm girl and kissed it.

‘’Have a good night m’lady. ‘’ He said with a fake polite voice they use in Whitespire court all the time, especially Tick.

After making sure Quentin knew how to come back alone, he went into the house and decided to call it a night. He had waited to see how the accidental date went and, surprisingly, it seemed that nothing catastrophic happened. He tried to wait for his partner to come back before falling asleep, but he was gone the moment his head hit the pillow, exhausted by a long day and too much alcohol. He woke up when he felt Quentin getting into the bed and curling around him.

‘’It seemed to go have gone well, ‘’ he said, turning to look at his lover, tucking his hair behind his hear. He hated how it covered his face.  
‘’Yeah, I think it’s the first time I had a date where I didn’t make an ass of myself.’’

Eliot laughed lightly and kissed him, noticing Quentin’s lips tasted a bit different. Not unpleasant, but different. And the hardening budge he had since he’d slip in the bed was a good bonus as well.

‘’I’m sure you managed to do something awkward yet charming... Eliot said, putting his palm over Quentin’s underwear.

The younger man closes his eyes and swore under his breath. Oh. Okay. He was that horny. Thank you, Arielle.

‘’What?’’ Teased Eliot. ‘’I didn’t hear what you said. ‘’ He said staring a back and forth motion through the fabric that made Quentin make a sound that went straight to his own dick.  
‘’I….’’ Quentin gasped ‘’I s...said I didn’t do an...oh fuck El...I didn’t do anything awkward.’’  
‘’Then what did you do. ‘’ Eliot said kissing him slowly as his hand snaked inside the fabric. He could feel his lover melt into a puddle as he started to jerk him off. ‘’  
‘’We….uh...ah….talked. And ate...fuck el ….’’

Quentin tried to give him some pleasure back but Eliot pushed him gently away, loving playing with him too much. His own pleasure could wait a bit more.

‘’Talked about what? I want to know about your date! Why are you so shy about it. ‘’  
‘’I...I’m not … fuck …. I...’’  
‘’Hmm?’’

Quentin was leaking, helping the motion as well as driving both men into madness. He felt the momentum building and just because he could, just to show the power was literally in his hand, he stop his motion. The whine the long-haired man did was simply divine.

‘’I’m waiting. ‘’ He whispered kissing his shoulder, he could feel both their breath being faster than usual.  
‘’I told her about...about the quest. Well, that we needed to solve the puzzle. And...’’

He tried to trust his hips to have some friction and El loosen his grip for it not to happen.

‘’and? ‘’ he said, amused, around and part of him impressed that Quentin had been so true to her on the first date.  
‘’That we aren’t fillorian… Fuck El I swear to god. ‘’

Eliot grin as Quentin looked at him with those puppy eyes that always melted his heart. As a reward, he leans and kissed him hungrily as he started back the hand job he was giving to his lover. It took barely a minute for him to come, stifling a scream in a passionate kiss.

After cleaning himself, Eliot allows Quentin to ravage him with his lips and his touch. The thing this man could do with his mouth was simply divine.

From this day on, Quentin and Arielle were dating. His partner was adamant that they were not and he was taking things slow and she just got out of a relation and blah blah blah. Yet the week after, when she came to sell her good, he went to walk with her to Nakia and, since the basket was working like a charm, Arielle spent a few hours at The Cottage, mostly laying in the grass and kissing Quentin until it was time to leave.

She did make him one of her famous three-layer peach and creme cake as a thank you gift for the spell on the basket, so that was another bonus.

And weeks went by like that, her coming in mid week and spending time with Quentin after her work, sometimes staying over for diner and letting Eliot cook for her after telling her he didn’t need help for the fifth time. She helped to plant herbs and flowers needed for Quentin’s poultice, that way they wouldn’t have to go to Nakia all the time. She even helped with the puzzle, placing the tile and helping them doing yet another failed pattern.

Quentin mood definitely improved and he even sent him on an errand to the city, which would take more or less two days back and forth, and not be worried and his boyfriend was alone for that long.

Boyfriend. Even after months, this couldn’t stop Eliot to have a stupid grin on his face thinking that finally, Quentin Coldwater was his boyfriend. All it took is a trip back in time and being stuck in the same place for a year.


	11. 10- Arielle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arielle need to go to town and meet someone she didn't expected to see there

Arielle didn’t intend to actually start something with Quentin the day she asked her on a date. She went because he was cute, mysterious and it was nice to feel wanted after what Lunk made her feel. But despite his nervousness, he was actually pretty fun to be around and, when he calmed down, he shows who he truly was; kind, funny and with a sense of wonder in every little thing in life. His awkwardness was one of his most adorable attributes and as she started to know him, she even started to exchange glances of fondness with Eliot. 

It was quickly evident she couldn’t hide her flirting with a boy and, once again, her sister came to her rescue. It was her who talked about the boys doing the puzzle and how they were good clients. A day or two after when Arielle told her dad she was being courted by one of them, they were not stranger anymore. They were good clients, who paid well and never gave trouble. So he didn’t mind. She had a curfew for the nights she was seeing them, but that was not different from Lunk. In exchange for that help, Delilah requested the latest details and gossips from her little sister. No one but her knew about the magical basket. 

That had felt like a blessing from Eliot in itself. 

Her joy had brought something happy into the house, which felt nice. Lately, all of the news was gloom and more than once she had to force a smile out of her brothers. Eamon was writing to them from the battlefront and the more time passed, the more horror he saw. The school was now closed after a clan of wood elves who was loyal to Loria had looted and destroyed most of the classes. And on top of that, people had started to steal goods in the orchards and they could have entire trees robbed of their fruits. 

So a reminder that joy and love can still happen was another blessing in the Lanclair house. 

That afternoon, Arielle was getting ready to go to Barion, so she could go get their pantry stocked with ingredients she used for her peaches and plums pastries. She was not sure if they were really good or if people just needed small joys in their life, but they were selling much faster than she could bake them. Even with Elias help, they were always out of product before the end of the week. 

Plus, her brother Ducan was in town and she could try to see him a moment if it was the Gods will. 

So after lunch, she went to the crossroad between the road to Barion and the road to Sutton, Arielle waited for the cart to come by. After paying her due, she climbed aboard and sat near an elder woman who was knitting. During the two hour ride to town, the young girl ended up holding the blue yarn and listen to tales of an older Fillory when dragons and not men were to be fear. 

Her brother and sister in law were too busy for her to come and hang out in the boutique they were owning, so Arielle started to do her errands, buying and trading goods. Most could go in her bottomless basket but, to avoid suspicion, she asked for the flour, sugar, and grains to be delivered at her house. Everything she came for, even posting the request for harvesting help on the public board, took less time than she anticipated. The return cart wouldn’t be back before a few hours so she decided to browse for the simple pleasure of looking at goods that were offered. She even found something for Quentin and Eliot that they could use and was not too pricey for them to refuse. Even if they did, she’d find a way for it to go back to them. Her next run around the houses was in two days and she couldn’t wait to see them again. Especially Quentin. Those few hours with him were a blessing the God had given her. 

‘’Arielle?’’ A surprised voice behind her said

The young girl turned to see a bewildered man with long hair, sparkling eyes, and hands to die for. As if she’d summon him just by her train of thought, Quentin was just there and now two days away from their next meeting. It was the first time they would be seen in public and for a second, she didn’t know if she was allowed to run into his arm, or had to act like a friend. 

‘’Hey’’ She said as he came near her. 

The way he took her by the waist and kissed her answered her previous questions; there was no hiding here. She answered back and only stopped when someone grumbles to do that somewhere else. They were in the middle of the pedestrian road so yeah, it was deserved. Grabbing her hand without hesitation this time -it was new that he stop wondering if he could be affectionate first and oh how much it made butterflies linger into her stomach- and pulled her out of people’s way. 

‘’What are you doing here?’’ He said tucking hair behind his ear. God was he doing it on purpose.   
‘’I am doing errands as you see. ‘’ She said wiggling the arm that held her basket, ‘’I should be the one asking you this, I never saw you or Eliot away from The Cottage before. ‘’  
‘’We try to get everything from local people, but sometimes we need to stack up on things no one in the traveling merchant sell. ‘’ He said putting back his hand around her waist and pulling her toward him. It wasn’t possessive like Lunk. It felt like he just wanted to touch her, to be close to her. 

She couldn’t help but kiss him. He sighs as he answered and she couldn’t help to do it as well. 

‘’Do you want to go back home with me tonight?’’ She asked. ‘’Or you had other plans?’’   
‘’Tonight?’’ Exclaimed the young man which surprised her. ‘’You shouldn’t walk alone at night?’’  
‘’Walk...? Oh by the ass of the Gods. ‘’ Gasped Arielle, her eyes widening like his. ‘’Please tell me you didn’t walk from The Cottage to here! It must have taken you a whole day!’’

The way surprised melt into confusion on his face answered and she couldn’t help but laugh tenderly. Of course, they wouldn’t know. The cart transport system was so obvious to her since she used it as a toddler with her mother. It always had been part of her life. People from Earth shouldn’t expect easy transportation like this. She explained how three times a day there was a departure from the crossroad and from the town. 

‘’Holy shit, and here we are walking for the past two years.’’ He exclaims, putting a hand in his hair. 

It was a weird thing to think, but she always like when he swore. Earth’s language was so colourful and different. She adores those expressions she only heard from him and Eliot. 

‘’Good news, you won’t have to walk the way back, the last cart is before dinner time. ‘’ She said kissing his nose with laughter.   
‘’Well I already paid for a room in the inn. ‘’ He said pulling her a bit closer, red colouring his cheek. She felt the butterflies into her chest explode in many particles of joy. ‘’And maybe...you could miss the last cart of the day. ‘’  
‘’Hmmm,’’ she said, blushing as well, linking her arm around his neck. ‘’It did happen before, you know, busy day, long wait to pay. ‘’  
‘’and of course, you want to pay each merchant their due. ‘’  
‘’of course.’’  
They both grinned and kissed, knowing that they both agreed to a big step in their relationship. There was no doubt the moment they will be in the room they wouldn’t tear each other's clothes. And by the Gods, she had wanted to do that to him for weeks now. 

Deciding to finish Quentin’s errand first so they could have the morning for themselves, they walk around the many store and outdoor stall. She showed him where to go and who would rip him off right away. Everything went into Quentin’s bag and something told her Eliot might have enchanted it as well. There was no way so many alcoholic bottles got into this and no bulge would show. The whole time he held her hand. 

Arielle had discovered how much she liked Quentin’s hand. They were strong and not too long or too short. They seem able to battle the world if needed but also were able the gentlest of caress. Those hand had marks of a manual worker and him being a magician could explain it. The constant stacking of tile was most likely another reason. 

But what she loves the most about them was how they were desirous yet without that negative aspect of it. It always gave her the option of going away, which she would never but there was a reverence to it. Like he couldn’t believe he could touch her. And as he threw away her shirt and put them on her skin, she discovered another world of desire and envy that those hand communicated while their mouth was occupied with one another. 

As expected, the moment they the door of Quentin’s room was closed, their body collided into a tornado of desire and longing. They were soon half naked, stumbling into the bed and gasping at the kiss that seemed endless. 

‘’Pants, down, now. ‘’ She said and how he obeys yet still looked into her eyes made her crave for him even more. 

Now only in his underwear, he put his hand over her leg and pushed up the long skirt she was wearing, kissing the inside of her thigh and slowly climbing his way up. Never she heard of a man doing this and she couldn’t help but let an audible gap when his mouth went over her underwear, kissing her vagina in a way she was not sure was legal. Usually, it was the work of a woman to do this, but Quentin seems to like it because he only retracted to pull away from her underwear and kissing her without a barrier. He only stops when her hand what pulling his hair and she was moaning his name as a wave a pleasure overtook her. 

With a smug smile, he looked at her and kiss her tight before finally getting rid of her skirt and his own underwear. She blushed a bit at his laugh and pulled him for a kiss. She then realizes that the sweetness she was tasting was herself and she couldn’t help but moan as her hand went exploring Quentin’s desire. He was bigger than Lunk, not longer, but bigger. She returned his smug smile when he bit her lips and let out a gasp. 

He quickly pushed her on her back, making her stop her hand movement and tower over her, kissing her like his life depended on it. His hand was exploring every curves and inch of skin he could find and she was unable to think or react properly. She had never felt like that while sleeping with someone before. Feeling...worship almost. 

‘’I want you so bad, ‘’ he whispers in her hear as he was kissing her neck. The warmth of his breath against her skin made it even more sensual

‘’That what are you waiting for, ‘’ she growl as her nail dug into his arm. 

He wasn't asked twice and after a moment to adjust, he went inside her. Both Quentin and she shivered at the feeling and look into each other eye’s a second too long not to acknowledge that this meant something for both of them. She leaned toward him and kiss him as he started to move his hip.

It didn’t last long, but it was hard felt, passionate and made her see stars. She was lying on his arm, letting him undo her braid that was more knots than anything else. His fingers were relaxing in her hair and, by the way, she could hear his heart rate, she knew he was as elated as her. 

‘’that think you did at first, ‘’ she said, breaking the silence that had fallen between them. A blush came to her cheek, only thinking how his mouth had felt nice. ‘’is that something you do on earth a lot?’’  
‘’hm.. yeah? it’s not a thing here. ‘’  
‘’No’’ she laughed, seeing the panic in his eyes she went to kiss him slowly. ‘’I liked it. ‘’ 

She felt his whole body relax and she put her head on his chest, trying to come back from her pleasure. He undid the last knot in her hair, their hearts rate were less likely to explode now. When his stomach started to growl, both lovers started to laugh.   
‘’I’m starving too.’’ She admitted.   
‘’Why don’t we eat in the room tonight?’’ Quentin said after a moment. 

She looked at him with a genuine smile, happy not to have to put herself back to a more respectable way. Seeing her approval he kissed her, quickly dressed and went downstairs to the inn, going to order things to eat and drink. 

Now naked and alone in a bed, Arielle looked at the moon ray entering the room and painting it with silver. She was trying to fight this feeling bubbling in her chest. It scared her and she was not sure if it was genuine or simply a balm over a healing wound. She closed her eyes and prayed, asking Amber and Umber for guidance and strength. Like she always did when she felt lost or scared. 

She opened her eyes when she heard the door open and put the bed sheet around her as Quentin came back with a smile. He walks toward her and grabbed her lips for a quick kiss like he’d miss it in those few minutes alone. 

‘’They will deliver it when it’s ready, ‘’ he said on her lips and she couldn’t help herself to giggle and kiss him back. 

This time their kiss was not urgent and full of love. It was slow and nice. And didn’t help with her bubbling sensation in her chest. He put his hand over her side and pulled her toward him, making the sheet lower a little, exposing one of her breasts. He pulls the sheet back in place not without caressing it and making her nipple hardening and her desire rise inside her. 

‘’Hm... I just want to be sure. Because last time I didn’t ask and assumed and...’’ she said blushing as she was trying to get back some coherent thought in her head. She took a deep breath and look into the brown eyes of the boys she was trying not to fall in love with. ‘’What does this mean? For you? For me? For us?’’ 

Quentin put his hair behind his ear, licking his lips and grabbed her hand. Their finger linked gently and his thumb stroke her skin lightly. 

‘’I don’t know. What do you want it to be.’’ He asks almost in a whisper. 

She didn’t want to be asked that. Everything but that. The answer terrified her. 

‘’I think I’m falling in love with you. ‘’ She admitted, linking her eyes with his. She could see his pupil widen a bit ‘’and I...don’t know what it means or what to do and I’m scared.‘’  
‘’I know I am in love with you too,’’ he said kissing her hand. The sparkling feeling in her chest exploded into her and a deep shiver ran down her spine. ‘’and I am fucking scared too. ‘’

They both looked at each other, a small smile on his lips that made her have one as well. It felt nice to say it out loud. To know. She would be crushed if he’d been like Lunk who only had wanted a bit of sex on the side. Knowing that the feeling she had might be reciprocate was the help the Gods just sent to her. She was sure of it. 

‘’We have all night to think about it, ‘’ said Quentin, putting his forehead against hers.   
‘’I had other plans for tonight. ‘’ she joked, kissing him, he answered without hesitation this time. 

The only reason why they didn’t sleep together for the second time was the small knock on the door announcing the arrival of their food. Quentin started to laugh at her lips and went to get their meal, making sure the door was not so wide that the person could see her only covered by sheets. 

Looking at him, at the door, saying thank you to a stranger and getting a tray in his divine hands, Arielle felt something open inside her. Like she knew. She was in love with Quentin Coldwater.


	12. 11-Eliot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Quentin going back into his depressive episode, Eliot ask help once again.

The idea of the bed outside had started not long after Quentin accepted to had help from Nakia’s poultice and his depression was still hard on him. Despite having a bit more energy to help with the mosaic, he still needed to nap a lot, sometime three times a day. This had caused a great deal of anxiety and self-hatred guilt that Eliot manages to shut down by bringing their matress outside during the day so he could sleep near him and go right back into helping when he woke up.

Soon the task of getting the mattress in and out of the house started to be a burden, even with magic, so they ended up trading one if Arielle’s father extra mattress in exchange for manual labor for a day. Eliot had wanted to die the whole time he’d help with the animals in the barn, but alcohol and love for Quentin were stronger than his past. At least he made himself believe. He knew it would simply be a new scar into his already messed up life. As she was coming to give them water and something to snack on -ordering them to stay for dinner that night- the young girl had probably seen something in his eyes because half an hour later she came back asking for help in the kitchen she didn’t really need. But he could have kissed her. He was more efficient and happy doing peach pies than tossing shit away from cows and goat. They didn’t talk about it, but when he thanked her after they were done cleaning, she smiled and kissed his cheek in acknowledgment of an unspoken pain. He insisted to clean the dishes before they left.

So now they had a mattress and it helped greatly. Even Eliot used it from time to time. And, they both discovered that making love under the star while anyone could catch them was something that both turn them on. Though they would go sleep inside once they were finished.

In the first few weeks where Arielle and Quentin were courting, she’d brought a sheet of white blue and red in order to cover the atrocity of the mattress, but also to make it prettier. At Quentin’s idea, they spent the night finding a way to make a bed frame with the wood they had and fucking there became even better after it, since it stops giving them so much back pain.

Thing went the way they were and soon enough life took back its simple way. Quentin barely needed a nap anymore and his mood was getting better. He almost exploded of happiness when he arrived from a visit in town where not only he’d discover there was a faster way to go, but apparently had spent the night with Arielle and had both acknowledging that they were dating. For days after that he was the first to wake up, even made him breakfast in bed and did laundry. When she came to sell her peaches and spent the afternoon with them, they both had the courtesy to go bang each other inside, not that Eliot had mind watching.

But as if thing went too well too fast, Quentin’s mood plummeted back to a low point. He had fits of panic attacks and refused to say what triggered it. He spent all his free time on the bed outside, looking at the sky, lost in his thought. He ate a little, drank too much and the poultice seemed to have stopped working their effect on him.

Eliot woke up that night with Quentin sobbing in front of a notebook Arielle had given him so he could write all he remembers from his friend, so he wouldn’t be scared to forget things. She gave one to Eliot who had written three sentences about Margo, closed the book and drank himself to sleep that night.

‘’Please tell me what’s happening. ‘’ Eliot said, sitting next to Quentin on the table as he quickly closed his note.

They both agreed those were private and never to be read by the other, the lack of trust stung a bit but he let it slide.

‘’This is it isn’t it? ‘’ Quentin said, wiping his eyes uselessly since he was still crying. ‘’We’re going to stay here forever. ‘’  
‘’Maybe not. Maybe - ‘’  
‘’El, I made the math. If we are during Queen Yanna’s war, it means we are forty-two years away from the Chatwin even coming here. And the book said...fuck I wish I had the book. I know I remember it said that Jane came as someone just found the solution to the puzzle. So we have to do this for forty-five- maybe forty-six years before we get it. By this time who knows what will happen to our friend on Earth. Time here is different and it might be centuries for them and we go back to them all being dead and all of this magic quest was for nothing and-’’

Quentin stops his rambling when Eliot put a hand on his and simply stroke it, listening to his thought spiraling into fear and despair. What he’d just said was a terrifying thing to think and really gave Eliot a lump in his stomach he hid with a simple smile and a kiss on Quentin’s temple. Being King had trained him not to let his emotion show when others were looking up to you. And his boyfriend needed his help more than Eliot needed a drink right now.

‘’I believe that the key sent us here for a reason, and it’s to do this. If spending out life doing patterns with tiles is what the quest needed us for, then let’s be it. You first know that time and magic can be weird, who knows what will happen if- when we find the key. ‘’ He says, holding Quentin in his arm, feeling the younger boy leaning into the hug for comfort. Without noticing he’d started to rock both of them, his hand going up and down his back. ‘’But spending a life together isn’t the worse thing that could happen to us. ‘’

There was a small laugh of acknowledgment between Quentin’s tear and Eliot smiled, kissing his head. Spending fifty years doing a puzzle seemed awfully long, but at least he had someone he was ready to spend his life with. The realization scared him as much as made him happy. Something he will have to untangle later.

‘’I hear you starting back to spiral in your head, stop that. ‘’ Eliot said after a silence that had cold Quentin’s tear, but visibly not his mind. The boy was so tense in his arm it felt like he was holding a metal rod.   
‘’You know what I don’t miss of Earth? ‘’ Eliot said, trying a new approach to the same problem they faced since they were here. ‘’I don’t miss those smelly muppet costume on time square that wants to take a picture with you for money. I’m pretty sure they aren’t allowed to go to the bathroom and piss inside their costume.’’

Quentin laughed quietly and looked up at him an amused air but tinted with a bit of sadness. Good. He was listening, not thinking.

‘’I won’t miss that the express trains only work during weekdays and we have to do local to go downtown and it takes forever. ‘’ Continue Eliot, trying to find things that he didn’t like about New York. It has been years since he’d live on Earth, but he could still remember bits and pieces. ‘’Or the smell of garbage day when it’s summer and it’s hot and all the bag stinks and you have to wash with perfume to forget it.’’  
‘’I won’t miss people literally walk into you and then tell you to look where you go like you are to blame ‘’ said tentatively the sad boy, a sad smile on his lips. ‘’Or that a bottle of water is five dollar if you are anything tourist goes. ‘’   
‘’Ugh don’t start me on food cart near central park, ten dollars for half stale nuts with too much salt?! Really’’  
‘’The Hamilton fan that would make it impossible to be near that street or you get trampled.’’  
‘’Or the guy that give you his shitty rap songs in case you are an agent and will discover him and make him rich.’’  
‘’The sound of the police sirens and the firefighter's.’’  
‘’That weird weather when it’s not warm enough to be in a t-shirt but took hot to wear a coat or a jacket’’  
‘’Fucking snowstorm’’

Quentin said the last one genuinely laughing, which he realized a few seconds later. He pulled out of Eliot's arm to better kiss him.

‘’thank you, I needed that. ‘’  
‘’I could bitch about New York all day, so never hesitate to start me on a rant about H&M.’’

He managed to put Quentin to sleep that night and only fell asleep when he was sure the young boy was not faking so he could go back to be miserable alone. The morning after, Quentin couldn’t get out of bed at the start of the day. Eliot made him tea, put it on the night table and wrote a letter to Arielle that he sent as a paper plane.

She was at their house thirty minutes later. Forgetting the puzzle for a moment, they both sat outside and ate the raisin bread she had cooked that morning as Eliot told her how Quentin fear to stay here forever and how he didn’t know how to tell him that it might not be a bad thing. There was a bit of hurt in Arielle's eyes but they both knew that in this state, Quentin was not thinking of his relationship with a Fillorian.

‘’I figured spending the day with him could help him,’’ said Eliot his mouth full of bread. Arielle nodded.   
‘’I can spend the night too if you need to. I told my dad I might stay for the day.’’   
‘’And he agreed? Didn’t your brother had to talk him out of having a chaperone when you come here?’’

Arielle laughed at little and popped some bread in her mouth, shaking her head. She had a smug he use to see on Margo when an evil plan was boiling in her head.   
‘’I didn’t give him a choice. He’ll get mad if he wants to, he did worse when he dated my mom. I’ll put that against him.’’

Eliot grinned at this. The way she was able to follow the rule yet bend them when they were not working the way she wanted to be made him think of the way Margo never accepted a no in her life. Their fierceness were both coming from within and not in reactions to something. They were that way. He adored Margo for that, and he truly started to like Arielle for it.

‘’Do you want me to help you with the puzzle later on or...’’ She asked, visibly planing the day and knowing Quentin might not get out of bed.   
‘’Take care of Quentin, that’s what’s matter.’’

Arielle nodded frowning.

‘’One day we’ll have to take care of you. ‘’  
‘’Bah, help with the laundry and we will call it even, ‘’ he said, dismissing the attempt she made to open him up.

She bit her lip, gave him the last bit of bread and got up. Clearly not satisfied with the answer but understanding the subject was close. For now.

‘’Yell if you need something.’’ She said before going inside the house, doing magic only early love could produce.

He tried to concentrate on the pattern of the day but it was hard knowing Quentin was not doing well and he wasn’t around to help. He’d been used to be the one around when he was like that and, even if it was him who asked Arielle to come, he felt a pinch of jealousy knowing she might help and he wouldn't. He tried to listen but nothing came out form the house, meaning they were not fucking cause they were both quite vocal. Was the silence a good thing right?

He sighed and reached for his flask on the table. Drinking was maybe the only way he will be able to cope.

With his head elsewhere and a pair of hand in less, he was only at a third of the puzzle when it was lunchtime while usually, they could manage to do half of it if not more. Trying to have one pattern a day was getting harder but it was the only constancy he had right now and needed it. By all the sip he’d taken from his flask, he was now in a state he liked to call drunkenness efficiency. He was numb to the world around enough to ease the pain and yet clear-minded enough to do something. He’d been in that state for most of his year at Brakebills and part of his first month in Whitespire.

He happily got distracted from lingering dark thoughts, when he heard the door open and saw Arielle get out with two large bowls and, to his great surprise, Quentin following her. From the dampness of his hair, she’d force him into a bath and made him shave. He even had new clothes on, even if they were a new set of pajamas.

Getting up to meet them at the table, he exchanged a glace with Arielle and, by her sad smile, he understood that she was now worried as well.

‘’Thank you,’’ Quentin whispered after he put his bowl on the table. It looks like a thick vegetable soup but the bottom of the bowl was full of sticky rice.   
‘’You's welcome. ‘’ Eliot said looking up to Quentin and receiving his kiss with a sigh. It was the first time he was affectionate with him in front of Arielle and, to be honest, the jealousy he felt earlier went far away from his chest.

The trio sat around the too small table and Arielle gives them a spoon.

‘’Traditional Fillorian comfort food. ‘’ She said a bit too cheered up for realness. ‘’Dig it up!’’

Eliot tried a small spoon because if he learned something from Whitespire, it was that a full mouth of awful food could stay longer on your taste bud. The lavender and pepper taste was as surprising than good when mixing with the rice. Both Quentin and him looked at each other with the same thought: this tasted better than many things they ate at the castle.

That's when Eliot notice Arielle closed eyes and concentrated face that stayed for a few seconds before she open her eyes and started to eat. Memories of his mother silently praying in mass flood him with intensity and it made him swallow the food a bit too fast, making him cough over and over. Through his tears and coughing, he said a ‘’It’s really good’’ which made Arielle laugh and Quentin smile.

After catching up his breath and wiping his eyes, Eliot could feel his face being flush with the blood going all over his head. Apparently Arielle had went get water and glasses for everyone while he was half dead. He drank his first glass without stopping.

‘’You don’t have to force yourself to eat Eliot, I can get something else’’ Arielle reassured when she saw him getting back to his food.

He stubbornly put in his mouth the biggest amount of food he could hold in the wooden spoon. Arielle smile quietly. Quentin ate in silence, probably back in his thought.

‘’Actually, it’s really really good. ‘’ Eliot said after swallowing. ‘’I just saw you pray and it surprised me. ‘’  
‘’Oh... hm... is that something you don’t do on Earth?’’ She asks, blushing, as she saw Quentin looking at her with surprise.   
‘’Oh no, some do. ‘’ Reassure Quentin, taking her hand. ‘’Just not a lot of people in our close circle. ‘’  
‘’If you say you’ll do it out of our sight I will call you Quentin Two for the rest of the day,’’ Eliot said before she could open her mouth.

The way she squeezes her eyes he knew she was about to say that. Because that’s exactly what well behave believer do, contrary to his parent that shoved it into your throat until you gag. He felt Quentin link his hand into his and that simple touch calmed him down. Those were the thing he loves in his new life here. That _finally_ Quentin could read his emotion even when he guarded them inside.

‘’I grew up with a family that had for religion....uh how do I say that. Well, let’s say that the religion doesn’t approve of me being gay. ‘’ Eliot explained, knowing too well that if she was to stay in their life she will ask the awkward question one day or another. ‘’Which I know there is not a problem. So pray away!’’  
‘’What does _being gay_ means?’’ Arielle asked, genuinely intrigued.

Both men looked at each other with wide eyes and then at the fillorian next to them. Alright, of all the question she could ask, this wasn’t the one he expected.   
‘’It means like to be with men romantically and sexually. ‘’ Said Quentin, stroking Eliot’s hand, a bit puzzled by the question. Polyamory might be a thing here but there was no way sexual orientation wasn’t.   
‘’Oh! You you have a term for that? Here we say incline to men or to women. That is if you have an inclination, some like both. ‘’  
‘’Well holy shit. ‘’ Eliot said, always impressed how Fillory could be centuries behind woman’s right and good plumbing and yet, be so more advanced than Earth on other things like sexuality and gender.   
‘’How do you call a girl that is inclined to girls then?’’ Arielle asked, finishing her bowl, her eyes sparkling. ‘’Gayess?’’

This time Quentin joined the laughter and answer her many questions. Eliot let them continue to talk and grab the empty dishes to go put them in the sink. There was a large bassinet near the bath where the fabric was soaking in soap. By the color of it was their bed sheet. That was a good idea to make him go out of bed.

Arielle came inside before he had time to do anything, her smile wide and seems a bit less nervous than when she’d come out for lunch.

‘’He’s going to nap on the outside bed. ‘’ She told Eliot, grabbing the pot of leftover that was still on their stove. ‘’You can continue to work or nap with him if you want. I’ll come and help with the puzzle when I’m done.’’

Eliot came to protest but she put a finger right on his lips.

‘’If you argue, I’ll call you Quentin three.’’ she half tease, half warned.

Eliot laughed and nodded. Then after a second of hesitation, he hugged her, letting her small frame melt into him.

‘’Thank you’’ He said, unable to explain everything he was feeling at this moment. Joy, gratitude, fear, sadness, anger, relief.

‘’Any time Eliot. ‘’ She said, hugging him back as fiercely

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was supposed to be angsty, but I got hungry at the end


	13. Arielle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's not be vague, its Arielle, Quentin and Eliot first threesome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im super self concious about writing smut alone without any help so Id really like your opinion on this chapter  
> Also body parts are weird  
> also I love you all

The only reason why Arielle was not doing the dishes after tonight’s lunch, it’s because Eliot pushed her and Quentin out of The Cottage and lock the door, saying it was the only way she wouldn’t clean something else in the house. Between laughter, they both knew that it was also his way of giving her time with Quentin alone. He had nap a big part of the afternoon but when he woke up he helped him finish the puzzle and even talked a bit more during diner time.

The couple decided to lie down on the outside bed and look at the star, Quentin explaining her that on Earth there was too much light for them to be seen. How heartbreaking this image was. Curled up against him, her head near his shoulder, she took in his smell and let this few second of joy overtake her. Lately too much negative things had happen and she needed to remind herself that life could be good, and happy, and loving. Not worrying about the farm or the chore for the next day felt like a blessing even if she knew she’d pay the price when she came home. Right now, her body against her lovers as he took her in his arm and talked about the stars was all she wanted.

‘’You are not listening.’’ Quentin teased, poking her side gently.  
‘’Sorry’’ she giggle ‘’I was just thinking that it was a nice day.’’  
‘’Yeah’’ he snorted. ‘’Babysit me and cleaning the house, how fun.’’

She looked up, putting his hair forever hiding his face. She wondered if he kept them long for that purpose.

‘’I mean it. It’s nice that I can help and be around you. ‘’ she smiled softly ‘’And I force my brothers to take baths, so it’s not a big change. ‘’

This made him chuckle and the laughter went into his eyes. She kiss the inside of his jaw, making him shiver and pull her closer.

‘’I know you don’t want to stay here forever. ‘’ She said putting her head on his chest. ‘’But is it selfish if I wish you do.’’

There was a silence in which Quentin stroke her back gently, she closed her eyes listening to his racing heart. She knew it was an awful thing to wish, but it was nice to say it out loud.

‘’That’s part of why I...’’ as she opened her eyes, she saw him making a vague motion toward his head that meant probably more than any word could ‘’I knew that being with you meant accepting to stay, but... it’s real now you know. I’m happy when you are around, really happy. ‘’

She smiled at him and lean to kiss him, giving him the choice. He took her lips without hesitation and both sigh into the first real kiss they’d exchange that day.

‘’ But?’’ She asked, putting her forehead against his.  
‘’But what if I find it? What about us?’’ He moved so both of them were lying on their side, facing each other, their leg entangled. ‘’I don’t know what I will do. I will have to go back but also I want you around, but I can’t ask you to follow me and if I stay El will have to go alone and I - ‘’

He stopped because of the tear in his eyes and her hand stroking his hair. Trying to soothe him when he was like this was like asking a hurricane to rest.

‘’you assume I don’t want to follow you.’’ she said, continuing to play in his hair since it visibly calmed him down.  
‘’would you abandoned everything, your whole family, and maybe never see them again? I can’t ask you to do that.’’  
‘’But you aren’t. Right now you worry about the future. But I know that if Eliot find the way to do the puzzle while doing the dishes, I’ll follow you anywhere. ‘’

Quentin was searching something in her eyes, probably a lie or fear, so she make sure to stay calm and try to put how much she was in love with him. It scared her how much she was. But right now, she wasn’t afraid. Something inside her knew that she would follow him to any adventure he would have. As long as they were together. He was the one.

‘’I love you’’ she finally whisper, deciding to say it for the first time in a moment when he needed to hear it the most.

The water in his eyes fell into his cheek and for a second she was scared that she did the wrong thing.  
‘’Fuck I love you too.’’ He whispered back, grabbing her neck to kiss her passionately.

Definitely did the right thing. He was kissing her like it was the last time and she tried to answer reassuring him that she’ll never leave. Half climbing on her, he deepened the kiss and stroke part of her breast over her shit. She felt desire burst inside her and knew that if they were not stopping now, they will end up without clothes really soon. His lips travelled on her neck and she shivered, grabbing his shirt and tugging it upward. Within second he’d pull away to throw away his shirt before going back to explore her neck with his lips.

‘’We should go inside.’’ she whisper, helping him undo her shirt, opening it so both her breast were exposed.  
‘’We don’t have to.’’ he almost growled as he started to kiss the side of her breast to finish over her hardering nipple.

His hunger made her even more lustful and she forgot everything when his lips went over her skin. As she gasped her head went on the side and she saw Eliot leaning on the frame door, an amused smile on his lips, drinking from his flask.

‘’ Eliot, can you undress Quentin please.’’ she simply said, giving him the chance to run inside the cottage and refuse.

Instead, he put his flash on the table and Quentin stopped his exploration as she heard her. Quick enough, Eliot was behind him and both men where kissing eagerly. Quentin’s hand were still trying to undo her skirt. Seeing him like this, them like this, was the most erotic thing she’d seen in her life. The long finger of Eliot were undoing Quentin’s pants and helped him getting rid of his pants, Arielle took this opportunity to throw away her remaining clothes on the floor as well.

Quentin went back to kiss her but she stopped quickly, biting his ear, feeling his budge growing in his underwear.

‘’Now Eliot is way too much dress, you should do something about that. ‘’ she whisper.

He looked at her one second to see if she meant it, and by the sly smile she gave him, he knew. She looked as her lover crawl toward Eliot and kissed him with passion as they both worked on removing all the clothes on each other’s body. She couldn’t help put to let her hand slide over her breast and go between her legs as she watched them go.

The fact that she was giving both boys order and they were so docile listening was somehow really arousing for her, which was something she was discovering. He moan lightly making Quentin remember she was also there and licked his lips watching her. It took her a moment to understand that he was waiting for new orders. Oh the flame of desire inside her was burning bright and hard.  
She went toward him and kiss him one before looking up at Eliot.

“Never saw two men together, show me” She simple said and Eliot grin widen.

She knew there would be a time where sleeping with Quentin and Eliot would happen, she didn’t expect though how easy-going it was between her and Eliot. She was not sure they were ready to touch each other, but there wasn’t an awkwardness around each other’s naked body.

She must admit, she liked seeing how Eliot was getting Quentin ready for him. How squirmish her boyfriend became and how Eliot became flustered and hard despite his self-assured air. After watching them a moment, she decided it was time for her to play as well and went toward Quentin to kiss him passionately. He bit her lips, moaning at one point, probably due to Eliot care and it made her shiver. Knowing that both of them were taking care of his pleasure was so rewarding.

“I want you too.” he whisper on her lips before gasping.  
“Eager boy” she tease kissing him. “Enjoy Eliot, I want to watch a bit. Then you’ll have me however you want.”

The moan of frustration mixed with desire that came from him made her shiver and kiss him one last time before back off the back of the bed, watching Eliot kissing Quentin’s back while preparing him. Apparently he was ready because Eliot looked at her, by the Gods, he too was waitng for her orders.

“Don’t put a show for me, do what you do when I’m not there.” she said,laying herself on the side so she would be more comfortable and yet her breast were visible for Quentin.

With a grin, Eliot whispered something into Quentin’s ear before lying down on the bed, Arielle not to far from them. Quentin was visibly in another world and seeing him overtaken by lust and love was one of the most beautiful sight she ever saw of him. The way he threw his head back and gasp his partner’s name as he lower himself unto him was the definition of voluptuousness

Both men got lost into each others. Eliot’s hand were gripping possessively Quentin’s hip, helping him to go down on him. He only change his grip when Quentin’s hair fell into his face and pushed them away. Arielle wondered if he was doing that for her or because he too enjoy the pure pleasure written on this boy’s face. The sound of their body mixing was echoing in the air, their panting getting louder and quicker. Arielle knew it was time for her to join them if she wanted a bit of it.

She knelled next to Eliot, sitting on her heels and she knew her boyfriend had forgotten her presence for a moment because he look at her almost surprise of her presence. She smile and kissed him, feeling his breath shorten. She knew that he was close and it was too quick, too soon.

‘’Alright you can stop.’’ She said on Quentin’s lips and the curse Eliot made was as amusing as his protesting groan.

She continue to kiss Quentin for a moment, knowing full well that he was sill on Eliot but not allowed to move and torturing them was more fun than she expected. She instructed them what was the following step and once again, they obey, clearly wanting to continue the half orgasm they were having. Eliot was now behind Quentin as he pulled her near him, kissing her inner tight and starting to suck the skin to leave a hickey no one could see. Soon enough, he was not exploring her with his tongue, his hand traveling on her leg, moaning from time to time as Eliot was rapidly thump inside him.

The way his tongue hit perfectly her clitoris and the groan of Eliot, mixed with the thirlling fact that they were outside and could get caught at any time. Gods that was such an image to paint. Arielle’s toe were curling as she looked at the star, letting a wave of pleasure wash over her like never before. She only came back to reality when Eliot groan her name. She looked at him, visibly surprised and understood right away. If she haven’t just came, she would again, because he was asking her permission do empty himself and that kind of power was more than she will ever have over any men.

‘’Quentin my love. ‘’ She said, shifting position so he would concentrate on Eliot and not her skin. ‘’Do you want Eliot to come inside you or outside you.’’

God she love hearing them swearing in unison. Earth swears were so much colorful than here.

‘’ah… inside...’’ he answer biting his lips and letting his head fall on the mattress, visibly moving his hips to help Eliot and wow -  
‘’ You heard him.’’ She simply said to Eliot with a smile, looking at him with loving eyes.

Thanking her with his eyes, he went faster and soon enough he was emptying himself inside Quentin who’s body was shaking. She look at boy boys taking their breath and kiss once Eliot was back on the mattress. After a moment he whispered something in his ear and kissed him quickly, smacking his ass. Quentin yelped and crawled toward Arielle who saw Eliot leaving and going inside the house. Probably not ready to see both of them together in that way.

Towering over her, he pressed his leaking cock near her and kissed her with desire, visibly still breathless from his time with Eliot. She stopped the kiss because he visibly needed air, but also to look at him. The way he looked back at her woke up butterflies in her stomach and she understood she could do this all her life and would be happy. Eliot included.

“How do you want me.” she whispered, playing with his tangled hair.

A few second later, he flliped her on her stomach, a bit like the position he had with Eliot and started to kiss and bite her neck possessively. She like how wild this tender boy could be in bed and feeling him rubbing against her, his hand caressing every inch he was physically able to do.

“By the Gods and everything beyond, stop playing Q and fuck me.” she half ordered half beg.

He didn’t wait to be asked twice and was inside her in a stride. Working on another hickey on her neck, she moan when he started to play with her nipple, making her almost impossible to move as he was going in and out of her. He was becoming possessive of her body and claiming every inch. And she loved it.

“ don’t stop” she ordered as heat was building inside her core.  
“I don’t intend to.’’ assured Quentin, going faster which made her moan even harder.

Visibly tiring, he change position and push her on her back as he climbed on her and continued his motion, biting her lips as he found a particularly pleasurable place inside her. She was starting to see star and he visibly knew it cause he continued over and over.

“ I love you” he whispered on her skin and it was enough for her to have the best and loudest orgasm she’s had to this day.

Apparently it did the trick for him too because she felt him emptying himself inside her a few second later. Their leg intertwined, a layer of sweat on their skin, both lover took their breath and kissed before allowing Quentin to flop on his back next to her.

“Jesus Christ” he said, still catching his breath and she could only laugh her approval. That had been a moment of pure bliss.

To her surprise, a cup of water was put over her face she looked up to see Eliot wearing only a robe and smiling wickedly. She sat up and took it, about to thank him when she saw that he also had brought both of them robes. And visibly he was lending one of his because it was made of silk and Quentin was not a silk guy.

She put the fresh fabric over her hot body and it felt like the caress of a lover against her curve. She tied it around her waist and went next to both boys who were drinking water, sitting on the bed.

“I was saying you made a good show” Eliot said as she sat next to Quentin. He put his free hand around her and pushed her close to him which made her smile. Those small gesture, even after sex, were the most loving thing.

“You were watching?”She said, visibly having misinterpret him leaving. It wasn’t out of uncomfort, but to get them the robe and the water when they would be done.

“You are not the only one who like to watch darling.” He tease, finishing his glass of water.  
“Noted.” She laughed.

They stayed in silence for a moment, catching their breath and looking at the stars. But when a gush of wind blew over them, she shivered.

“As much as I like doing it outside, I’m cold now. Let’s go inside” She said and both boys agreed within second. Good to know she wasn’t being demanding.

A fire was now crackling in the fire, probably Eliot’s doing, warming the small house. She sat on the couch, noticing that her robe had open slightly and the curve of her breast where showing. Knowing Quentin’s fondness for them, she decided not to fix herself.

“I’ll go get wood, it won’t be long” said Quentin, kissing her quickly before leaving the house.

Eliot, who had look for something to drink and eat, came back with cheese, bread and wine. He sat next to her, living enough space for Quentin to squeeze between the two of them. She thank him when he gave her a glass of wine and, for a moment, she felt he was analyzing her. Which made her self-concious. Had she done something wrong?

“I didn’t expected for you to invite me so soon to be honest.“ He finally said with a smile. He took her hand and kissed the back of it. “Thank you.”

This unspoken agreement between them was scealed now. They both knew that whatever relationship they had with Quentin, they were ready to build something together too. Maybe not lovers. Partners, friends.

“Believe me Eliot, if I could I would live with you two and help with the puzzle than staying at the farm. “  
“Why don’t you?”

Wait did he just invited her to live with them or had she lost her mind.

“It’s not...proper I guess. “ She said, taken by surprise. Eliot teasing smile made her realize he knew that she didn’t had an answer for that.  
“all I am saying, is that whatever it takes for you to live with us, if you really mean it, go for it. I’d be happy to welcome you. And Quentin too, he might just be too much in his head to do the steps. “

She couldn’t answer because Quentin arrived with a pile of chopped wood in his hand, blowing hair that was falling in front of his face. As Eliot was telling him where to put the pile, Arielle fixed the bottom of her wine glass. Eliot was right. If she was waiting for Quentin to do it, it might never happen. She was the one who had to propose.


	14. 13- Quentin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quentin and Eliot receive terrible news, and everything in the world will change after this.

The notebook Arielle had bought for them had been a real blessing for Quentin. If at first, it had been hard to put things on the page, now it felt like a relief. He couldn’t help to compare it to the Pensieve in Harry Potter where Dumbledore store his memories when his head gets too crowded. That was what he was doing also. But mostly when memories from his time in Brakebills or as a child with Julia were getting too overwhelming. His deepest fear was to forget them, and it helps to write some things. Like how Penny said he hated him but always ended up helping, or the smell of Margo or that time he was a fox with Alice. All of it. It stayed real if it was written somewhere. Right? 

Things started to get better as the day pass. Eliot kept teasing the threesome was the real reason why Quentin had been able to be more active and helpful. He told his lover to shut up even though he knew deep down that it was part of the reason why, well not really. The few hours the slept in each other's arm and waking up to a mixture of Arielle and Eliot scent had been something special that had created something warm in his chest that he tried to keep inside him. Plus yeah the sex was terrific. 

There was no logical way to make Arielle be around more. A totally high-Eliot had told him last night that he should be marrying her and Quentin had laughed and choked on his saliva which made both men laugh way more than they should have. It had been months since they had gotten high together and it had felt like they were back to their old self-post Fillory. Many parties had ended with Quentin Eliot, and sometime Margo smoking something strong and looking at the stars and talking about things that sounded deep but weren’t. After a while, Eliot would whine that he was thirsty, go to the bar and rarely came back, having found someone to hook up for the night. Well, that had been pre-Mike. Quentin shivered at the recalling of the possessed boy that had destroyed his boyfriend’s heart. How The Beast had used twisted way to get them low and desperate to die even before facing him. 

‘’Are you alright?’’ Eliot asked as he was peeling potatoes on the kitchen table. 

Quentin hadn’t noticed he actually shivered and it was not a metaphor. The boy nodded and stop writing, putting a lock of hair behind his ear. 

‘’Yeah I just...’’ He looked at Eliot who was preparing dinner. ‘’ Do you remember when our biggest problem was The Beast? ‘’  
‘’Oh fuck’’ snorted Eliot ‘’Seems like a lifetime ago. Not that he was easy to kill. It took us, what, thirty-something tries to do it.’’  
‘’Forty in fact’’ Quentin said, remembering the bitter and mind-shattering conversation he had with Dean Fogg about it.   
‘’We got lucky this one worked, with Eliza dead and all.’’

 

Quentin looked carefully at his boyfriend's face to be sure that was no trace of the pain of lingering self-hatred about the fact that it was Mike that had killed her. There was none. So he was either at peace with it or a good comedian. With Eliot, it was never clear

‘’ I wonder how we died the other thirty-nine times.’’ Eliot mused, throwing deer meat on the stove. The smell that came from its cooking made Quentin’s stomach growl.  
‘’I am sure one of those its because of Todd,’’ he said, wanting to make him laugh. 

Quentin closed his notebook as Eliot chuckled, nodding. The younger man wraps himself around his boyfriend, putting his cheek against his back and pressing his body as close that he could. He felt Eliot’s body relax which made him smile. 

‘’Do you think that’s why we got along so quickly at the beginning?’’ He asked, closing his eyes.   
‘’That’s something I’ve asked myself a lot since you told us about the time loops. Messing with time magic like that… there’s no way it didn’t leave something, some impression, inside us. ‘’

Eliot pushed away Quentin just slightly so he could move far enough from the stove that it would be safe, then turn to face him and looped his arm around him too, pushing him close against him. 

‘’I like to think that in each of them, we end up together.’’ He admits, smiling in a way he only does around him.   
‘’Me too,’’ said Quentin, his heart skipping a beat at the reminder that Eliot wasn’t with him because he was merely around and no one else was. No, they were together because they were meant to be. Like him always finding Fillory, it was his destiny to be with Eliot Waugh. 

Both boys kissed deeply with a tenderness that said everything they were not able to say out loud. They might not be the best with it was time to talk about emotion, but they showed it in other forms. The black-haired man only stopped because he had to make sure he was not burning their dinner. 

As Quentin was going to set the table, a knock on the door echoed the small house which surprised both men. Usually, by that time there was no traveling merchant, and they were not expecting. When he went to the door, he was surprised to see Nakia, the healer that had given him poultice to drink for nearly a year now. But his stock was still high, so he wasn’t sure why she was there. 

‘’Hey, can we talk a second?’’ She asked, trying to put warmth into her voice but sounded more forced than anything. 

Frowning, Quentin nodded, went outside and showed her the small table where they could sit and talk. The dark skin girl didn’t even have her ingredient basket, which he never saw her without. Something was wrong. 

‘’Are you alright?’’ He asked, concern. 

The half shrug and imperceptible nod she gave him as an answer wasn’t reassuring at all. 

‘’I know you guys aren’t good at keeping the news and knowing what is happening outside of here.‘’ She said looking at Quentin into the eyes. Her golden eyes were mixed with sadness and anger. ‘’So I figure you should know it from a friend.’’

Two strong emotion overtook Quentin. There were genuine happiness and fondness to the idea that she considers them friends. Outside of Arielle, Nakia was the closest person he talked with, due to her frequent visit to look about his mental health. The second emotion was a deep and cold fear that was freezing his heart and made him stop breathing for half a second. Both opposite, both strong, both colliding and causing the young boy to become paler and wanting to throw up. 

‘’You know about Eamon right?’’ She asked.  
‘’The one that’s in the guard? ‘’ Quentin half asked half acknowledge. He was confusing a lot of the name in his girlfriend’s family. They were too many, and he barely met half of them, so it was even harder.   
‘’Yes. He… He gave up his life to save a family to be killed by lorian soldier. They were sacking a town, and there was this family who threatened… ‘’

Tears fell on the healer’s cheek, and Quentin felt his heartbreak. Arielle had been so worried about him. And despite his best intention, he knew that he couldn’t have guaranteed his protection. It was already a fantastic thing that the Gods had agreed to protect her house, but now it felt too little. What good was protection when some of the family was on the field, shredding blood for monarchy feud. The War of the Sacred Source was one of the bloodiest in Fillory’s history. And yet Quentin had been too naive to think this wouldn’t affect the girl he loved. 

‘’Jesus fuck….’’ He swore.   
‘’They got the burial urn this morning, they asked me to help with the ceremony. Usually, I work with Arielle but when it was Elias who came fetch me I knew she must be taking care of the rest of the procedure. She probably didn’t even thought to tell you, or Eliot.’’ 

Quentin wishes that she would have run into his arm and cried all day. But it was not Arielle style. Being the oldest woman of the house, she must have taken the burden of preparing the funeral instead of dealing with her feelings. The young man put a hand into his hair, swearing again. 

‘’It will be a bit before dinner time, to give time to people from Barion and the surrounding to come. But I think you should go. Eliot too.’’

Quentin nodded, feeling numb as anxiety flare up inside him. Knowing how the Gods where loving fucking people’s life, it must have been their doing. A punishment to have asked to protect Arielle; her life saved against her brother’s death.

‘’Thank you’’ He simply said, taking Nakia’s hand and squeezing them. Then after a moment ‘’uh… is there like something you wear at something like that or…?’’

Nakia’s tear stopped as her genuine surprise drew the smallest of a smile on her lips. Apparently, his ignorance of Fillorian tradition had perks. After all, Fillory and Further brushed the idea of death without talking about the custom and practices of its citizen.   
‘’Right. You mustn't know. We acknowledge how the death was by colors. Blue is for drowning, red is for murder, black is natural, yellow is illness… you see the picture.’’

He did. But none of those colors would fit. 

‘’Try purple, that’s for royal services. There’s gold for an honorable death. Maybe gray, for sacrifice. In those tones. ‘’  
‘’I’ll put Eliot unto that.’’  
‘’If he has a question, you know where I live.’’

That night, what was supposed to be a nice dinner ended up tinted by sadness and worry. Eliot had tried to reason Quentin that Eamon’s death wasn’t his fault, but he wouldn’t believe any of his reassuring lies. As he washed the dishes, Eliot found something in their closet that was appropriate to wear and then, both men went to bed. That night, they only held tight, tangled in each other, reminded that at any moment they could lose each other. 

When Arielle saw them enter the living room, her composed faced crumbled into the mess of emotion she was probably trying to hide from her family. She jumped into their arm and, after a quick but strong hug to Eliot, she went into Quentin’s arm, buried her face in his neck and started to cry. 

He was so used to see her happy and in control that her complete despair surprised him more than her tears. He hugged her tighter, slowly backing up into a corner of the room so she could cry into his arm in peace. Eliot -God bless him- was doing the talking with her family so he could focus on her.

He was not sure what to do or say so he did what Julia did for him when he had his panic attack, just hold the person in silence and be there until they calm down. He made sure to keep his eyes low so he wouldn’t make eye contact with someone in the room who will feel like engaging a conversation. When she stopped trembling, he pulls out of the hug slightly so he could look at her tear struck face. 

‘’Let’s go outside alright?’’ he whispered like she was a wounded animal. 

She nodded and let him lead her outside and went near the barn where he knew wood barrel full of grain were stored and made her sit on them before taking her hand. She squeezed his hand back like he life depended on it. 

‘’I didn’t expect to see you here,’’ she admitted once she manages to make her sob stop for a few seconds. ‘’I just… Gods thank you for being here.’’ 

Their forehead was touching, and he let her tears wet his skin as well. Seeing her so vulnerable and small was something precious. He knew her enough to understand that. And the fact that she was allowing him to see her that way meant a lot for him since not even a week ago she’d seen him at his worse. 

She touches his gray and gold ensemble Eliot had found for him, blessing his boyfriend to have an extravagant clothing taste, even when he wasn’t royalty. By the way, his girlfriend's finger was tracing the golden pattern on his shoulder, he knew that Nakia had been right about what kind of color to wear. It was an excellent way to honor a dead person. More than wearing the darkest black you could find. 

He told her about the healer’s visit, and how he wasn’t sure what to do or say right now but the only thing he knew was that he’d wanted to run at her side the moment he learns of her loss. They kissed slowly. She cried. A horse came to eat Quentin’s ponytail. That ruined the intimacy moment, but the explosion of laughter that happened out of her made him wrestle with a horse entirely worth it. 

The whole Lanclair family was there. Even his brother’s family that was living in Barion. They’d made a special trip at great expense to come in time. Quentin witness something he never could genuinely understand as an only child; there was a bond between the brothers and sisters that seemed thickening as they were grieving together near the small urn that was the ashes of Eamon. 

He and Eliot had step away from a family prayer and went to help Deliah’s husband, Skye, and Cooper who were doing last minute preparation for the actual ceremony that would be held outside. From what he remembered, Cooper was the seamstress her brother had married and went to Barion to live with. Her brother who was… Rick? Relk? Reer? 

‘’Rhys gave the baby to my mom this morning.’’ Cooper was saying to Skye as they were putting lantern around a tree where pink and blue flowers were blossoming. 

Right. Rhys. Rubbing his temple, Quentin wonders why he was having such a hard time to remember everyone in the Lanclair’s family when he’d memorize over a hundred name from the Fillory and Further book. Sighing, he opened his eyes and saw Eliot flash in front of him, his boyfriend reading his mind and his need. He drank in silence, feeling the taller man’s hand in his hair. A soothing gesture as well as a practical once since he was fixing his messed up ponytail. 

‘’You are holding up?’’ He asked, and Quentin nodded.   
‘’It’s selfish to say, but it’s nice to be the strong one for once.’’

Eliot gave him a sad smile and kiss his forehead before both men were called by the fillorians who needed help for digging a hole in the ground. Knowing the body was not in a coffin, this surprised Quentin. But since he knew nothing of Fillorian death ritual, he didn’t say a thing and grabbed a shovel. 

As the family was finishing their prayer, the High Worshiper of the nearest temple to Umber and Ember arrived. Was it racist that Quentin had expected to see a human and not a Forest Elf? Probably. But to be fair, in his world all worshiper of religions were human. Friends and neighbor started to arrive, and soon there were too many people for Quentin’s taste. Eliot was gone to help to welcome new arrivals, and he felt rude to go inside to see if his girlfriend had finished praying. She needed that time to grieve, and his anxiety was not worth her pain. 

Why did he have to fall in love with a girl that had such a big family? 

He decided to go in the orchard and take a walk between the peach trees and hide until he heard a signal that it was time for the ceremony. Even if it was mostly a mental image, the idea that the trees were a wall between him and the farm calmed him down immediately. He tried to put his hand in his pocket, but those pants Eliot had chosen were way too tight for that. So he decided to put a hand in his hair, forgetting his ponytail and messing it up once again. He fixed it as he was going deeper into the artificial fruit forest, wondering how many acres they had, when he heard a man’s voice call his name. Arielle’s father was walking toward him with a warm smile.

Well fuck. 

‘’Are we starting?’’ Quentin asked nervously, never had been alone with that man.   
‘’Not yet, a few people are still on their way. When I saw you walk here, I figured it would be a nice place to talk.’’

To bury my corpse. Thought Quentin. Then he felt bad because as scary as it was to be with one’s father, he knew he wouldn’t be killed. How could he have such ideas at a funeral? Kicking himself mentally he tried to smile and nod. If he survived Alice’s parent, he could survive anything. This made him laugh for real, amused at the thought. 

‘’Nothing to worry about’’ laugh the elder man, reading the anxiety on the younger man’s face. ‘’I just had a long talk with Eliot earlier, so I figured I talked with you.’’

Once again, Eliot was the best at that kind of thing. Honestly, being around people was hard enough for Quentin, so when it was time to make a good impression or look your best, he became a wreck of nerve and most likely say dumb shit. It was still a mystery why Eliot Waugh, king of Brakebills, decided to be his friends. They were polar opposite of so many things. 

‘’I just wanted to thank you. My ‘elle haven’t smile this bright since her mother died.’’

It took Quentin two second to understand that El was the nickname of Arielle too. Oh god, this will be confusing at home. 

‘’She is the one that makes my life better sir.’’ He said simply.   
‘’Bah! Don’t call me sir. My name is Kieren.’’

Oh great, another name to try to remember and most likely forget. He’ll need to write them down somewhere. 

‘’I’d lie if I say at first I was happy to learn you were courting her, but I went around and ask. People seem to like you and your partner. For people that rarely leave their puzzle, you are quite known around here let me tell you.’’ Kieren laughed.  
‘’We are?’’   
‘’’course you are! No one ever tried to solve the impossible puzzle that long before. ‘’

Quentin felt he wanted to ask something but wasn’t. He was not the best at reading people, but it seemed clear that Arielle father was trying to tell him something that was going over his head. They heard a voice calling them back to the yard; the funeral was about to start. Both men turned and walked toward the house. 

‘’I…. I care a lot about your daughter sir...ah sorry.’’ 

Great way to break the silence. While Quentin blushed and kicked himself mentally, Kieran laughed. 

‘’I know you do. And by the way, she melted when she saw you, I know she does too.’’ said the older man. ‘’But...let me ask you this. ‘’

They both stopped at the edge of the orchard. People were seated on the chairs surrounding the hole Eliot and him had dogged. There were too many people for the number of seats, so some were standing, other had kids on their lap or were seated on the ground. Quentin saw Eliot in the back of the crowd, talking with a couple. Arielle was near her very pregnant sister, smiling slightly and talking to Lunk. Jealousy dogged its way into Quentin's stomach, and he tried really hard to push away his insecurities to focus on Kieran’s question. 

‘’If ever you solve the puzzle, will you leave The Cottage?’’ 

This took Quentin by surprise and look at the slight frown of worried that was showing on Arielle’s father face. 

‘’Most likely, but from my guess, we are far from a success.’’  
‘’ And Arielle?’’

Jesus fuck. That was the exact question he had been struggling for days now, and now he had to look composed and reassuring? 

‘’If...When it happens. The choice will be hers, I will never force her into something she doesn’t want to.’’

That was the vaguest answer he could come up without telling him that his daughter might have to choose between staying in Fillory or going on Earth… and forward in a time of nearly fifty years. It seems to reassure the older man who nodded then walk toward his family. 

Fuck anxiety was back, His palms were wet, and he felt the hopelessness creeping back into his head. Fifty years. 

Lost in his mind, his thought overtaking his being, Quentin realized that he had no idea how he just ended up seated on the ground, Eliot by his side, Arielle curl against him, his arm around her. They were both listening to the High Worshiper, so was all of the people around. Jesus Christ, how long did he dissociated this time? 

A small sniffling sound made him came back to reality. Looking at Arielle who was openly crying, he held her tighter and tried to focus on the ceremony. He needed, for once, not to let his anxiety win and be there for someone that needed him. For once. 

Quentin wished Earth had the same kind of funeral than Fillory. In this part of the land, they were burning the body and put the ashes in a clay container. While the High Worshiper was signing -literally signing- his prayers, the vessel will then go inside the hole that was previously dogged. Members of the family or close one would put ribbons of color that were supposed to represent a different aspect of his personality they wanted to Gods to remember. Arielle was too shook to be asked questions, but he figured the color was right because she buried her head in his shoulder when she came back from putting a white ribbon. 

Then magic happens. Literally. Everyone was silently praying, their head toward the sky and mouthing the same word that the High Worshiper was signing, while he covered the hole with dirt. Once it was included, the small patch of uneven earth started to glow a burning red, then white, then blue. Oh. Those were the color of the ribbon the family had put with the ashes. As Arielle linked her fingers with his, looking at him instead of the ceremony, he smiles at her. Through her tear, she smiled back. Both were overwhelmed by the moment. Even Eliot had put his hand behind Quentin’s back, taken aback by the rainbow of color dancing through the earth and then stopping at the same time the prayer finished. And with a great sigh of relief from the crowd, a twig pierce the dirt and slowly dig its way up.   
Quentin heard Eliot whisper a swear which made him bite his lips not to laugh at the amazement. At this moment, watching a small tree growing out of the ashes of a dead one, Quentin remember why, as a kid, he fell in love with Fillory. For this kind of pure, simple yet beautiful land of magic.

When the ceremony was over, the tree was still young. Arielle explained that it would take about a week to be grown at its full maturity. In her family, most burial would produce a fruit tree, but it was different for each person. Her mother, per example, had become the cherry blossom tree that was near the orchard. It clashed with the rest of the greenness, and yet, it seemed protective of it. 

“I should have remembered,” Eliot said when they were the two of them alone, Arielle having to play hostess for many other family members. “When we came back from giving you to the centaur, Fen had shown us Alice’s tree. It was the dogwood tree in the garden. I thought she had ordered one and plant it in her honor. But she did have the ashes of her first body. 

That was a weird sentence to say that could only make sense to twice revive, ex-niffin, Alice Quinn. A small stone went into Quentin’s heart. He misses Alice. She was not the same anymore, she was harsher and lost, but he knew the Alice he loved was somewhere inside. He hoped that she will find her way back one day. He’d hope he’d be able to help. 

‘’I didn’t know that, about the tree,’’ Quentin said.   
“Well, I didn’t think it was a good thing to tell you yet. You were grieving and in a bad place for a moment. Margo and I were scared that if we’d tell you, you’d live under that tree forever.”  
“I might have” he laughed sadly. 

At Kieran’s insistence, both men stayed for dinner, as well as half of the Lanclair clan. Cousins and uncles he forgot the name the moment he was told. The house was too small to host so many, so they ate outside, on chairs or seated on the ground. The kids were running and laughing, people were talking with vigor, there was even one of the relative that had brought something that looks like a violin and played. It sounded like a mixture of piano and flute and was strangely haunting. People were dancing and singing songs at the melody. This felt like a party more than a funeral. 

“Sadness is for the ceremony” Said Arielle when Eliot pointed it out. “Now we celebrate life. His and ours. “  
“Having a tree in the backyard to remember him must help,” Eliot said, his back leaning on a tree. 

The tree of them had hidden in the depth of the orchard to have a bit of privacy and to avoid the boys to be harassed by over-curious relatives. Eliot was against a tree, Quentin leaning into him and eating. Arielle was seated in front, her back on a tree as well. For a second, it felt like they were alone and this was a piece of heaven they found together. 

“Yes. But not every person come back as a tree or as a flower, we don’t really know why. The scripture says its the Gods harshest punishment for a life lived unwell, but I’m not sure. It seems the Gods could punish us much harsher than that. “

Both men looked at each other for a second, not wanting to talk about Gods that they will end up killing in a few decades. Thankfully, Arielle didn’t notice as she was swatting a bug that was buzzing around her.

Since some of the family members were hours away from the house, the farm was using every bed and couch possible to make sure people had somewhere to sleep. Delilah and Skye had turned their spare bedroom into a nursery for the upcoming baby but shared their couch. It was without hesitation that Arielle gave her bed to her great Aunt who was so old she was a sneeze away to break a hip. This provided an excellent reason for Quentin to bring her home, lending their outside bed to Elias who had given his bed to another relative. The young boy was ecstatic to sleep at The Cottage, and Arielle stayed with him on the couch, looking at the star and talking about their brother until the young boy fell asleep.

When she enters The Cottage, Eliot was drinking and writing, a cigarette half lit in his hand. Quentin was pretending to read near the fire, spying on her the whole time. He closed his book and open his arm when he saw her approaching and within seconds, she was on his laps, her legs against her and her head buried in his neck. They didn’t talk for a moment, letting the emotions and exhaustion of the day set it. Only the scratch of a pen of Eliot was audible. 

“Q?” said the small voice of Arielle who pushed her head up so she could look at him. Her eyes were wet, but there was no tear in it yet. “Let’s get married.”

Eliot had stop writing. Quentin heart stop. He was pretty sure his brain split in two for a second as his gaze went into hers. 

“I know it’s early. “ She added quickly, seeing his reaction. “But I had a talk with Eliot a few weeks ago and... with Eamon dying and the war...and you might leave anytime...I just... life is too short, and we don’t know what will happen, but I know that I want to spend it with you. Here. Or wherever you go. “

Quentin looked at Eliot when she mentioned his name and the older man nodded the confirmation of a talk he didn’t know had happened. Did his boyfriend tell his girlfriend she could marry him? Wow, just this sentence gave him a headache. Before panic took him over, before he looked back to Arielle, he saw the small smile of Eliot and knew that this was something already settle between the two of them. The choice was his. Fuck usually isn’t the boy’s job to propose. 

Thank god he never said that aloud, Margo would have aparate and punch him for only thinking something like that. 

He looks at Arielle, teary eyes, fear, and joy on her face, shaking in his arm. He knew. At this moment he knew. If Eliot was on board with it, fuck he was so ready to do something stupid and marry too early a girl that made him feel like no other one had. Not even Julia. Not even Alice. It was stupid, it was out of emotion, it was everything he should panic about. But instead, a sense of peace washed over him. 

“Alright.” He said, putting his head against hers, watching her face going from fear to pure elation. “Arielle Lanclair, will you marry me?”

He had to ask. Because he was a hopeless romantic. Eliot would laugh about it later. But first, she kissed her approval. And somehow, between a mix of emotion and limbs, he finished in bed, Eliot completely naked next to him, Arielle flopping on the other side, catching her breath had he just made her come. Eliot turned and kissed his neck, making sure a hickey would be there tomorrow, Arielle linked her hand to his. 

When he woke up this morning, he was going to a funeral. How did it end up in a threesome, celebrating his engagement to Arielle...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what your opinion of it! Hope you liked it !   
> xx


	15. 14- Arielle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arielle, Quentin, and Eliot are becoming a family

They all wanted a small and quiet ceremony. Nothing fancy. But that was not knowing the Lanclair family. Arielle and Quentin’s wedding became a source of gossip that went even to Barion where Rhys heard about it in his shop. It had been an event every time a child in the family had to be married, but Arielle felt it was even worse for her. When he was not reassuring him that he was outstanding with the idea, Eliot had to calm down Quentin panic over the event itself. That’s why she’d wanted something quiet and simple.

“People are starving for happy news “ Delilah had told her when she’d complain to her sister about it. “Especially after Eamon’s funeral. But I’ll tell dad to tone it down a bit.”

Arielle wasn’t sure if her sister could calm him, but she appreciated the gesture. She made sure to ask Nakia to keep an eye on Quentin’s mood and the healer had ended up gave her a calming tonic as well. At least, the preparations didn’t drag for months as it did for Syke and Delilah. Within weeks everything had been settled; Cooper was repurposing her wedding dress to do one for Arielle, Eliot was in talks with a tailor for suits, the High Worshiper that had help with Eamon agreed to officiate their union and did the partner ceremony for Eliot and Quentin, and they finally decided to do the service at the rainbow river and do the celebrations by the glow of the lake.

Gods she wish her mother was there.

The day before, her brothers had move all of her belongings to The Cottage, not wanting her to see her groom before the wedding, as it was bad luck. They came back with a letter from Eliot promising they will both sleep tonight and that he’ll knock Quentin unconscious if need be. Quentin had a four-page letter that was mostly rambling of love and fear and his anxiety showing up in the most adorable way. But there was a passage she’d read over and over until she knew the words by heart.

_….. I know I should have to tell you the whole truth when you asked me if I came from somewhere else. But it was already scary for me to tell you I was from Earth, can you imagine me telling you I come from the future where magic is dead and that the puzzle I am making with Eliot is part of the solution to bring it back? You would’ve run away. And it was the last thing I wanted. You were right to be mad when you discovered it, I don’t know how many more time I can tell you that I am sorry. But the fact is, that night when you stormed off The Cottage and went for a walk, I was sure I’d lost you. And the ache I felt without you was grander than anything I’m giving up on earth. Because back there they will live without me, but I can’t live without you._

_When I woke up to your body slipping inside the bed and asking for my arms, it took me everything not to cry. Well, no cause I totally cried. But what I mean is… I would have understood if you’d never wanted to see me again. Heartbroken, but understanding. Even Eliot didn’t know what you will do, which is surprising because usually, he’s good at those kinds of things. But seeing that you came back to me, to us, made me realize that all those time you say you’d follow me where my adventure takes me and that you were ready for anything happening….you meant it. It was not just an empty promise made by someone in love. It was true._

_When you left the morning after, Eliot told me that The Cottage without you didn’t seem right anymore. Part of it was missing. I am blessed that he always welcome you into our life. But that morning I understood you aren’t just marrying me. You are joining Eliot and I. And tomorrow; we will become a family._

_And for once in my life, I am not scared of a life-changing event, but I am impatient. Impatient of waking up to you every morning, to hear you sing when you work, to call Eliot our partner in life and eager to call you my wife._

_I love you_

_– Q_

_P.S: I bet you all the gold in Fillory that I will cry when I see you_   
_P.P.S: Eliot says I can’t bet that, because we all know it’s going to happen._

Later that night, Arielle’s father found the young girl fast asleep in her bed, the letters over her heart.

The day after, Delilah woke her up despite being free of house chore for a day. Not having their mother, she was the only blood relative that was female that was there to help her get ready. Cooper was supposed to come and help with the last minute detail an hour before the beginning, but for the morning, both sisters would spend time together. So they did something they hadn’t done in over a decade and drank cocoa and bread butter on the bed, gossiping about anything and forgetting for a moment that they were adult. She even accepted without guilt Elias offer to make her a warm bath.

Having Eliot and Quentin providing warm water on demand with the flick of a finger had made her realize how much effort it took for anyone here to go to the well, get the tub filled them to warm it with a low fire. This was why most of the time they cleaned with the water rain barrel gathered. Especially in summer since the temperature made it not to cold that you didn’t have to heat it before cleaning yourself.

Arielle stayed in the tub her brother had prepared until the water was cold and her hand looked like dried prunes. She let her sister starting to brush her hair, not use this anymore, and looked at her reflection in the small mirror in front of her. It took her this moment to fully understand that she was getting ready for her wedding. A bubble of anxiety and happiness mixed inside her stomach and rose to her chest. The emotions took over her so much that she had to let out an audible exhale and put her trembling hands on her laps.

‘’The wedding jitters just got you?’’  
‘’Shut up. ‘’ Arielle answered back laughing, knowing her sister had had to deal with this situation not even three years ago.

And now she was heavily pregnant with her first child. The idea to have a child with Quentin and raising it as a family with Eliot’s help made her heart burst with love and nervousness. She was doing this. Oh by the hooves of the Gods.

Cooper arrived when Arielle hair and makeup were done, the young girl was looking at the rose and white flower crown she’d wear at the ceremony, now starting to worry if both boys would find this strange or if it was the same on Earth. Well, now she knew they had experienced a fillorian wedding and Eliot was in fact in an arranged marriage with a girl that was not even born yet. But the fact that it had been rushed and forced and it another time didn’t mean the tradition was appropriately kept as the teaching of Ember and Umber was told.

‘’I don’t think I can put more blush on you ‘Elle so please stop your face from becoming paler every time you start thinking. ‘’ Delilah scolded which made the young girl blush. This pleased her sister who dropped the brush and pink powder  
‘’Is everything alright?’’ Cooper asked, putting the veil and the dress on her bed.  
‘’Yes..yes...’’ half-lied Arielle. She was still conflicted with the truth of Eliot and Quentin story. But it was more a matter to accept that they were not only from another world but they were from a future where the Gods were no more. Her affection for them had not changed, despite what they’d believe. ‘’Just wishing ‘ma was there.’’

Both older girls gave her a small, sad smile that promise not to pry into it more. Which was a good thing. Because there was some truth, she was learning, that your family can’t understand.

Cooper had made wonder with her old wedding dress: it had the same pale sky colors of blue, white, yellow and pink, but instead its enormous gown with layers and sleeves, it was a simple drape over her shoulders, the rest of the fabric floating by itself and yet, falling in the right place to show her curls. It was simple yet elegant, which fitted her better. When she entered the silk-like fabric and turned toward the mirror to see herself, tears filled her eyes with happiness. Arielle knew she was pretty, but right now she was gorgeous.

‘’Oh no! You are not allowed to cry I put too much time on your eyeshadow for this.’’ Tease her sister, patting her face lovingly.

It made Arielle laugh, and she let both girls finish her look with the matching veil and the flower crown. That time when she looked at herself, she felt like a bride.

Her father gasped when he saw her as she came out of her room. Which, she must admit, made her feel pretty, unique and loved. The four of them went into the family cart and drove to the rainbow river, where everyone was waiting for her. Stress rose into her stomach at each inch they were making forward. Probably feeling her nervousness, Delilah took her hand and smile kindly at her. Following the older girl’s lead, her father started to sing fillorian songs just like he did when he was working in the orchard.

Quentin cried when he saw her. Which was expected. The big surprised was Eliot’s teary eyes as well. It made her tear up too. She barely listens to the High Worshiper ceremonial talk, focusing on the warmth of Quentin’s hand in her and how his eyes had golden flakes she never noticed before.

She promised obedience, care, and love; he promised protection, respect, and admiration. The first kiss they shared as husband and wife was met by a thunder of applause. The crowd of over more than two dozen people was rejoicing in their love.

As everyone was led toward the food, drinks, and music, Arielle, Quentin, and Eliot stayed alone with the High Worshiper who blessed the union of the two men as life partners. Despite her faith, Arielle didn’t fully understand the religious intricacy of why only the Royals could be married twice at the same time but not the commoners. That was why the life partner ceremony was something that could link a poly relationship like theirs. Eliot would still be able to share their bed, metaphorically and physically, without angering the Gods. Plus it was the same promise of care and love she’d share with the brown haired boy.

But this ceremony had to be private. Not because religion asked for it, but because she knew it was a big emotional step for both men who were doing this because she entered their life. They might have never gone forward and make a promise to the Gods if she didn’t show up, but the fact that they were doing it without even feeling the mandate to do so was the purest form of love Arielle saw.

And just like that, they became a family.

They both hug a long time and share kisses before joining the rest of the crowd. Both Eliot and Quentin were holding her hand, their face glowing like she never saw before. Hers was probably too. From this now on, she would be named, Mrs. Coldwater. And she couldn’t be happier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the kudos and taking time to write a review! They motivated me so much to write this chapter! I didn't plan to write the wedding but one person saying they were looking forward to it made me want to write it too! So thank you thank you thank you


	16. 15-Eliot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliot is alone at the cottage when Quentin and Arielle leave for a honeymoon week in Brass city. Hold habit dies the hardest

The day after the wedding, Arielle and Quentin were gone for the week discovering Brass City and its surrounding. The young bride had been puzzled at the idea of having a vacation between, but since both boys had indulged in many fillorian traditions during the ceremony, she agreed to the honeymoon. Quentin had insisted that Eliot came, but he refused every time; not only he wanted Quentin to enjoy this moment of happiness, but he also knew that he and Arielle would probably jump each other’s bone all week and the couple needed some time without Eliot sharing. Not that he ever imposed himself in their bed, but when he was around, Arielle always made sure he was included in the pleasure. 

But Quentin insisted that if he was not going with them, he was not allowed to do the puzzle either; him to needed vacation. That Eliot agreed on. So after sending of the couple, he took his first day to clean the house, put Arielle’s clothes in a drawer they’d empty for her. She only had one box that was not clothes, and in it there were books that he put in their growing bookshelf, an unopen letter from her father, a notebook that looked like the one she’d given to him and Quentin in order to free their mind, and a portrait of her whole family, mother and Eamon included. He put that drawing on the top of the fireplace where she could see it. 

The fact that it took him less than an hour to unpack all of her things depressed Eliot who decided to throw all his self-promise sober grand ideas for the week. Now alone, the silence was making his thought sound louder than usual, and he needed to keep them shut. 

He was drunk before noon. 

That night he got tempted to peek into Quentin’s notebook. And Arielle’s. He took one of Nakia’s herb for a headache that had tremendous mind-numbing effect when using in a higher dose. The bed was too big; he slept on the couch. 

The hangover he got when he woke up made him understood that it had been awhile since he’d been that drunk or that he was softening cause he was not the kind of person to have a bed ridding hangover. But now he was cause he stayed on the couch until the idea of food seemed too tempting.

Knowing he couldn’t do another day of nothingness, he decided to take the afternoon cart to Barion. Thank God Arielle told them about that. 

Within an hour he had a room at the inn and found someone to join him in it. The sex was not even good; the guy gave a sloppy blowjob and made him do all the work when it was time to prepare. The red-haired boy was gone even before dinner, and Eliot stayed naked in bed looking at the ceiling feeling like he’d just cheated on Quentin. 

Of course, he didn’t. There were no rules about him sleeping with someone else while Quentin married another person. But they never really talked about that part of the deal. Eliot knew he did it because he needed to prove himself that he still could get a stranger in his bed within less than an hour. He did it because, despite everything, he agreed to a sort-of-marriage with another person. He did it because he wanted to remember the Eliot from Brakebills who only sought pleasure and magic. But this love deprived boy was gone. As well as the High King of Fillory that neglected his wife because he wanted to blame her for all his problem. Now he was yet another person.

How many sides of himself did he discover since he moves from Indiana? Too many. But never he’d thought he’d be the kind of guy that was happy to have a simple life, next to his life partner and his wife. Arielle was becoming a friend, but he knew she was no Margo. No one could be like his Bambi. And yet, he was still… happy. 

So this was it. That redhead boy was the simple proof that he got so scared that thing could go right for once in his life that he tried to fuck it up. Self-sabotage 101. That he was good at. Better making himself suffer than starting to think that he was accepting to leave everything behind and finish his life around a stupid puzzle that made no sense. If he were with Quentin, he’d have a happy life. 

That night he ordered room service and wrote a paper plane letter to Quentin telling him everything. He’d try not to show how much it hurt writing his stupid impulse but he knew some of the paper was now wet with an errant tear and ink was slightly smearing He sent the plane flying in the sky and let the window open, knowing he might never an answer back. 

He passed out mostly because he was drunk and his sleep was filled with nightmares of him coming home to a house where the red hair boy was now living, and Quentin and Arielle were nowhere to be found. Every time he tried to flee The Cottage to see them, he’d end up back in the kitchen where the stranger was. We woke up in the middle of the night with a slight layer of sweat all over his body. The fresh air of outside was making him shiver, so he closed the windows. It’s returning to his bed that he notices the paper plane on his nightstand, next to his flask. With the flick of a hand, he lit the oil lamp to find his lover’s response. 

‘’I love you too, there’s nothing to forgive. I miss you more than you think  
-Q’’

Eliot’s heart was beating so fast he had to take a breath to stop his body from trembling. Not only Quentin had an answer -which he hoped but was sure wouldn't happen- but he seemed understanding and not in pain at all. Part of him hurt to think that he might have expected it from the beginning and was surprised he hadn’t cheated before. The other part of him knew he didn’t cheat and Quentin had most likely a panic attack that Arielle calmed down. They probably talked about it together; she made him realize that the guilt Eliot was feeling was a twisted way to prove his love to him. And Quentin must have written that answer before going to bed and make his new wife moan his name until dawn. 

Of course the last part he imagined more than he knew. But it felt that was a predictable Quentin-like reaction. And he knew Arielle enough that she will never tell him if he ever asked what his response was. 

He decided to stay another day in Barion because the idea or returning to an empty Cottage was depressing, and because he was emotionally hangover from everything that happened the day before. He ended up going to see Cooper and Rhys at their shop. Their baby was sleeping in a crib at the back of the store while Cooper was sewing a new order and Rhys was building a new shelve to showcase their latest creation. Eliot decided to help him, without magic, just because it would keep him busy and he wouldn’t have to hold the sleeping baby if ever he woke up. The moment the little bundle of noise woke up, Eliot left and aimlessly wander around town. 

He went to a bookstore, knowing the house desperately needed new books, and, to his great surprise, found two books of elemental spells. Nostalgia more than need made him buy them, unsure how the bookkeeper had had his hand on those. He spent his night in his room, redoing basic Plopper spell and casting minor spells just because he could. In this Fillory with magic. His hands were rusty, and it kept the mind busy. As he was finishing the first book, he received another paper plane form, Quentin. 

‘’Arielle wants to know what size of shoes to wear and makes me write this letter. Help I am not even a week in my marriage, and I am getting bullied.  
Love, Q ‘’

This made laugh Eliot. Not a lot, but just enough to make him decide to stop wallowing on himself and get back to have a spine. If he continued that road, he’d be back to the sad waste of a man he’d been the first time he arrived in Fillory. Never again he wanted to be so low. He answered to Quentin and went to bed, finding it hard to sleep now that he was not drinking himself unconscious for the third night

In the morning, he went to see a carpenter who he’d help in the past and secured a large delivery to The Cottage for the next day. He bought more notebooks because, damn, this thing did help Quentin and him too. As he’d promise, he went to say goodbye to Cooper and Rhys before going back home. The sun was disappearing when he hopped out of the cart and walked home.

He slept on the couch again. 

The days after went faster now that he had a project and something to keep his mind busy. To prove to Quentin and to remind himself that they were not only temporary visitors, but he’d also decided to renovate The Cottage. He built wooden panels for the window so they could stop using worn out sheets to cover them. Knowing Arielle loved to help with their small garden, he fixed the boxes that were under the windows and made some more so it would look symmetrical on the house. 

Elias came during the week to sell peaches and plums. With Arielle away, he’d taken over to help. The young boy had offered help to Eliot, and he figured company couldn’t be a bad thing. Arielle’s youngest brother was so talk-active that he’d fill the silence alone with minimum interaction from him. The day after he came and Eliot gave him the task of painting the house, window panels, and new garden box. It was tedious work that he’d didn’t want to do, and it would make a nice touch instead of the miserable look this place had. 

While the young boy was working outside, Eliot uses some spell from the books he bought that he’d almost forgot. He magically widen the bed so they could fit without one of them always being on the edge of falling off, made a tardis-like spell so their closet would be bigger from the inside and after many calculations, he managed to create a system where Arielle could get water in the sink and the bath without having to ask them or going to the well. This one was hard because it was doing magical plumbing and even if it was physical magic and he was a physical kid, that had required a lot of layers of magic. 

When Elias invited him to eat dinner with his family, Eliot was so drained from performing magic, that he accepted the offer only because he didn’t have to cook. In the middle of the meal, he realized that he was technically eating with his in-laws. He drank a bit more wine than he should. Refusing to stay the night, he went home, and Elias promises to finish by tomorrow. This time Eliot went to the outside bed to sleep, only because it was the nearest comfortable thing. 

The sun woke him up too early for his taste, and there was no good enough coffee in Fillory to wake him up, so Eliot decided to try his magical faucet and put his face in cold water. Fuck he missed showers. And this was too complicated to spell anyway. He should ask Quentin opinion on it though, they both didn’t think of faucet before it was needed for Arielle…

Elias arrived as he promised and both men worked on the yellow flower box until lunch. Eliot did like showing off his cooking skills to a new person, so he ended up making quite a nice meal for them and even let the younger man take wine because the kid was fourteen and Eliot wasn’t his dad. The whole time, he listens to Elias talk about the farm and rumors of the war. Quentin knew more than anyone about it, and when he’d offer to share his knowledge after The Gods had come to bargain with them, Eliot had refused to know; the less he knew, the more chance he had not to say something he shouldn’t. But he knew Whitespire would win, so he tried to sound reassuring when Arielle’s brother express concerns. 

‘’By the hooves of the Gods!’’ A female voice gasped behind them.

Turning, Eliot saw Quentin and Arielle hand in hands, their bag on their shoulder, eyes wide with surprise. This pleased the older man grandly. 

‘’ oh ‘Elle! Quentin! Hi! ‘’ Exclaimed Elias who jumped to his feet and went to hug his sister. 

Quentin uses the distraction to walk toward Eliot with a grin.

‘’I see you’ve been busy this week’’ He said before grabbing his hand and leaning to kiss him quickly.

Contrary to him, make out session were not Quentin’s favorite thing where there were other people around. 

‘’You’re early’’ Eliot answered back, grabbing another quick kiss before pulling away.  
‘’I missed you. ‘’ Quentin admitted, blushing. ‘’ And Arielle said we could spend the last two days of vacation doing nothing at home instead. I liked the idea that you’d be part of the honeymoon.’’

Eliot felt a warmth in his chest when he realized that home was nowhere for Arielle. And that she was the one suggesting to spend time with. From the beginning he was trying so hard to make sure Quentin didn’t feel he had to choose between the two of them, it was appreciated that she was doing the same in return. 

The young girl came to Eliot and hugged him hard; her face glowing as a new bride should be. It was so contagious he wasn’t able to do anything but answer back with the same happiness. 

‘’I have things to give my family from Brass City, I’ll give them and will be back. ‘’ Arielle said, taking one of the bags Quentin was carrying, ‘’Wait for me to have dinner!’’ 

She kissed Eliot on the cheek and Quentin on the lips before walking away with Elias who made sure Eliot was okay that he was leaving. For a moment, Eliot wondered if she had things to give or if she wanted to give the boys a moment together. Either way, it was much appreciated. The moment the siblings were far enough, he grabbed Quentin’s neck and kissed him like in the first days. He needed to remember the taste of his lips, the softness of his kiss, the eagerness of his tongue. 

Both boys stayed intertwined, kissing hungrily until the lack of air had the best of them. 

‘’ Talk later?’’ Quentin asked, panting.  
‘’Talk later. ‘’ He agreed, pushing him against the door so he could kiss him while he was trying to open it. 

They didn’t even make it to the bed. Right on the couch, both men shared some of the most passionate sex they’d ever had. Which meant a lot in their case. The red-haired man had nothing in comparison to the god-like blowjob Quentin gave him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ._. i know this chapter isnt the best, but ill make it up with the others! love xx


	17. 16-Arielle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first few months at The Cottage

Life at The Cottage changed. At least, from what Arielle could figure out, things were not the same as they were. Which was a bit normal now that she was not just staying a few hours or even the night, now this was her house too. Despite being merely half an hour away from her father’s farm, it was strange to think that she was now a married woman who lived outside of her family’s house.

Coming back from Brass City with Quentin and seeing that Eliot had made an effort to make the house more enjoyable to live in meant a lot to her. Not only it was less of an eyesore for the eyes, she knew he truly wanted her here when she saw that he unpacked her few boxes and even created a magic system for her to get water easily without asking them. The following week she planted the garden Eliot had prepared for her and made sure both men were well fed while working on the puzzle. It happened more than once that she had to remind them to eat lunch. Otherwise, they’d skip it.

She tried to help as much as she could with the puzzle, but it became clear that this was Eliot and Quentin’s thing. They were working on it before her, and they had their habits and methods. She did come every evening when the last tile was placed, knowing entirely it will not work. Then she’d kiss Quentin, Eliot would make dinner, and the newlywed would undo the tile and put them in a pile for the day after.

She only let Eliot cook because he refused that she did everything in the house. Which puzzled her a bit, reminding him that this was what she was supposed to do. She gave up after the third day when Quentin lured her away from the over to undo the tile. He told her that on Earth women weren’t expected to do everything in the house, they fought to get rid of this sexist way of life, and it was Eliot genuine pleasure to cook for them. It was not because he didn’t like her food, on the contrary.

‘’What am I suppose to do then if you don’t want me to be in the kitchen!’’ She complained. ‘’I can’t do laundry when the sun is down, and there’s so much you can do at night! ‘’

She didn’t have to help her brothers with homework or prepare desert to sell for the day after. She couldn’t even do the dishes since it was Quentin’s turn to want to do something. She didn’t know what to do or how to help, and it was becoming frustrating that the boys didn’t want her there too.

‘’How about you relax?’’ Laughed Quentin, helping her to get up from the puzzle square and taking her in his arm. ‘’ In this house, you are on the same level as us, which mean we share chore and enjoy a bit of free time when we have it. ‘’

She wanted to reply that in her father’s house there had been equality too, but she knew it wasn’t right. She never saw her father cook, unless her mother needed help. And Elias only learns how to create pastries because she was leaving and none of the boys knew how to do the daily needs for their peaches delights. Just like Eliot, her little brother adores baking, but he tried not to show it when their father was around since he knew he shouldn’t. Maybe she should ask Eliot to give him a cooking lesson here.

‘’I just… give me time to adjust alright? Maybe for you it’s easy, but you are asking me not to do what my mom raise me to be; a good housewife. ‘’

They were now lying on the bed outside, looking at the start which was appearing as the sun went down. The first moon was already bright in the sky. Her head was on his chest, and she could feel his heart beating fast and hard. It was so beautiful to think that she still affected him, after all those months.

‘’You are more than that to me, and always will be. I didn’t marry you to have someone cleaning my pants.’’ Quentin said, playing with her braid. ‘’I had Eliot for that.’’  
‘’I heard that.’’ Said a voice from the house which made the two others laugh with genuine amusement.

Arielle buried her head in Quentin’s neck, his long hair tickling her skin as she presses her lips to his. She felt him shivers. A burst of butterflies bloomed into her stomach.

‘’My strange man from another world.’’ She mused, knowing there was no way she would win this fight. She will have to get used to their way of life and try to understand it as well. They kissed and cuddled until Eliot call them for dinner.

It took her the first few months to get used to the idea, but in the end, Arielle loved the house dynamic. Everyone is working to keep it clean and messing it up as well. It was around that time that she started to feel less of a third person in an already established couple, but part of a trio that was interwoven in a way only they could understand. She was fond of the kisses she got from Quentin before she left to her father’s house to do their weekly sale -an arrangement she ended up making with Eliot after she complained yet again to fell useless- , the glances Eliot and her would make to each other when Quentin would do something awkward or fumble something, the way they would have sex the three of them but also sometime letting the other enjoy Quentin for themselves, how Eliot beg for her massages and how he made her baths filled with strong aroma when she had cramp from her time of the month. Those were small mundane things but were her favorites things.

The first time Eliot and her kissed was during one night where the three of them were enjoying each other’s lust. Things were blurry because of the wine, but Quentin had ended up tied up to the bed by the wrist, totally naked and his erection very visible as Eliot made a scene to undress, then undress her. She was not used to the hand of another man on her, but the way he touched her made her feel more like a piece of art than an object of desire. She understood that he was putting a show for Quentin while making sure she had a positive experience. For the flash of a second she wonders how many partner Eliot had before, but then Quentin moaned as her dress hit the floor and she forgot about everything else.

‘’Do you want to drive him made even more?’’ Eliot whispered in her hear, putting a hand around her stomach, pressing her against him so her butt could feel his growing erection.

This made her blush because she knew Eliot was more attracted to boys than girls, they had been clear on that front, and she always respected that boundary. She looked one second at Quentin who was pulling against his bond, wanting to join them yet being a few inches too short of being able to.

‘’Of course.’’ She said looking at Eliot.

Eliot gave looked that made her understood he’d stop if ever she asked. A look that was built on trust, love and also, in-depth consideration for his partners. Before living with them, she always believed Eliot as a possessive lover. But now that they were not battling for Quentin’s love and that she was part of the deal, she discovered another side of him. A side that made her understood why Quentin fell in love with him.

She smiled as a way to acknowledge the unsaid and let him lean toward her to share their first kiss. His lips were rougher than Quentin, yet the kiss was slow and soft at the beginning. Hearing Quentin gasp, they both smile in their, and she turned herself to face Eliot, making sure Quentin could see her butt at the same time. Eliot put a hand on her neck and deepened the kiss, building it from tentative to lustful. She bit her lips, he growls, Quentin was now moaning their name over and over.

She let him push her over the bed where she fell on her back, a few inches in front of Quentin who was now using his colorful Earth swearing while Eliot was kissing her neck and exploring her breast with his hand. She giggled when he started to laugh against her skin at their lover’s lust.

‘’How do you want to do it’’ She asked Eliot, a hand in his hair, sighing as he kissed one of her nipple that was becoming flawlessly erected.  
‘’You had him this morning, let me play with him,’’ Eliot said attacking her second nipple.

She did pull back Quentin in bed for some time together while Eliot had been starting the puzzle. Yet, with how Eliot was treating her with his mouth, it was hard not to be greedy.

‘’Fine.’’ She said, knowing Quentin loved when they talked about him like he was not in the room. ‘’I’ll make tea. ‘’

Eliot grinned and kissed her quickly before crawling over her to Quentin. For a moment she had his erected penis in her face. She knew her touch wasn't Eliot favorite thing, but she was still tempted to know how he tasted. Wondering if the boys were corrupting her during sex, Arielle put one of the silk robes of Eliot, making sure to tie it just enough to cover herself and yet seeing the curve of her breast. She looks at her boys and smiles fondly. Quentin was glancing at her with desire while Eliot was kissing his stomach and preparing him. She blew him a kiss and went in the kitchen.

Why did Eliot ever said she was loud, had he ever heard him and Quentin during foreplay?

She went to the fireplace and put another log so it would keep the house warm for the rest of the night, then went to the kettle and filled it with water before putting on the stove. It was amazing how quickly she was becoming used to quick access to water. The idea that tea wasn’t a task in itself was quite delightful. And let’s not talk about baths. The boys have been talking about a shower, which supposedly was a system of plumbing that made rain on you. It seemed strange for her, but both boys said it was one of the things they most missed about Earth. They tried to do it with magic as Eliot had done with the faucet, but for some reason, the gravity wasn’t working with their spell, and their calculation was always off...something like that. Magic seemed hard.

‘’Oh my god do that again.’’

She wasn’t sure if it was Quentin or Eliot that had said it since a loud moan was made at the same time. The boys had reached a new height of pleasure; she never heard those noise before. Still taken with lust because of Eliot expert mouth, she huffed in frustration and went on the couch, listening to the boys while guiding her hand to her clitoris. She felt something starting to rise in her when the noise in the bedroom stopped. Knowing the boys were over, Arielle cursed and ended her self-indulge pleasure, going back to the kettle that was about to be ready.

She felt a hand going around her a few moments later as she was putting herbs in the boiling water. She smiles. It was rare the boys were out of bed so quickly. Usually, Quentin would take back is breath while Eliot would bask in his post-orgasm happiness for a few minutes.

‘’Go back to bed El’ I won’t be long.’’ She laughed.

The kiss that went on her neck was too soft not to be Quentin’s. How weird she had become aware how his lips felt on her skin.

‘’Oh he still is my love,’’ Quentin said, opening her robe.

She put the kettle away and closed her eyes, thanking the Gods that had given her such a good husband Always taking part in the pleasure, always making sure everyone had their share.

‘’Seemed you like the scarves.’’ She purred as the silk fell on the floor and Quentin was behind her, exploring her body with his steady hand.  
‘’Hmmm’’ He agreed, sucking on her skin to leave a mark. ‘’I liked watching you two together.’’

His hands were now southward, teasing her slightly before finding her clitoris and starting to do small and slow circles. She’d been turned on before, but by the hooves of Ember, this was erotic, even for them.

‘’Y...eah?’’ She managed to say, grabbing the counter so she could steady her legs quivering and unstable.

Quentin went faster.

‘’Hmmm.’’ he agreed against her skin.

She sighs his name as his finger was playing with her and she felt the heat build up in her. In her mind’s eye, the tableau they were forming was something that only helped her grow her coming orgasm. When he whispered against her neck how much he loved her, Arielle saw stars and Quentin had to hold her for her not to collapse on the floor.

She turned to face her husband, breathless and flushed with desire. His face was as red and as happy as her. They both grinned before kissing slowly. This time it wasn’t for sex or foreplay. Those were kisses of affection and mutual love.

‘’So, is that tea coming or what?!’’ Said the voice of Eliot and Arielle laughed against Quentin's lips.  
‘’The things you make me do ‘’ She sighed before kissing him quickly. ‘’Now go to bed, I’ll come with the mug.’’

Quentin stole a kiss before going back to bed. The morning after, Arielle had to wash the sheets for the second time of the week.

After hanging the sheets for them to dry with the sun, Arielle took the pile of clothes and the sewing kit she had brought as well. Sitting at the table, near the puzzle where her boys were working, she started to fix the holes and tears some of their clothes had. It was mostly Quentin’s clothes since Eliot sense of style wouldn’t allow it to be worn again, but she did fix one of his favorite vest that needed only a few stitches and new buttons. Doing it calmed her down and made her feel a bit more useful in the house. Eliot had suggested he find a spell and Quentin was ready to learn how to sew, but Arielle put her foot down and told them she needed to do _something_ while they were working.

 ‘’Why would green go there we always alternate see….’’

Quentin and Eliot were bickering about the pattern of the day, knowing they were working their frustration with those painless banters. Those boys were terrible at talking about their emotion about each other, but living with them, Arielle was starting to discover that the way they communicated the best was in nonverbal actions and half-truth hidden in laughs.

A small noise came from her left and the young woman looked to see a black and white bunny hopping next to her. Her heart started to race when the small furry animal bounced on her lap and exclaimed:

‘’Pregnant!’’

She only felt her heart stop and heard the sound of a tile breaking on the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone that is giving kuddos and commenting, you are the reason why I continue working on this fic every day


	18. Eliot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliot reflects on the fact that Arielle is pregnant. And by reflects, it means full blown panic attack

As Eliot was doing his best coping mechanism to deal with the news that Arielle was pregnant, the young man realized how lonely he could be without Quentin by his side. Granted, it wasn’t the best idea of shutting down all his emotion, drinking and taking drugs when the couple wasn’t looking. Many time, they tried to make him speak, but if it wasn’t quest related, he wasn’t answering more than with grunts. After dinner, he would go to bed early and pretend to sleep when they came, hours later. Insomnia had left him since he arrived here. But it came back hard and fast. The morning he would wake up before them, having barely slept an hour or two, avoid the mirror not to see the bags under his eyes, spike his morning tea and get the puzzle started. Quentin seemed to take forever to wake up and come back working with him, but if he wanted to be happy and cuddle with Arielle, he was pleased they were doing it far away from his sight. 

He knew that he couldn’t keep the attitude up, but right now he needed to drown his feelings to allow Quentin and Arielle to be happy. And they were. Quentin was probably on the edge of a panic attack about what it meant and how it rooted him for good in Fillory. But Eliot didn’t have the energy to control his emotion and his partner. And for Quentin’s sake, he needed to keep his feeling in check first. 

‘’Never believed I’d say those word, but you look like shit. ‘’ 

Nakia was looking at him with a wide smile as she opened her door to let him in. It was the third day since they had the news and Quentin and Arielle were gone at a dinner in her family, probably going to announce the good news. Eliot decline to come but discovered quickly he couldn’t be alone either. He knew now by experience that a good fuck with a stranger would solve nothing. Drugs and alcohol kept him afloat, but usually there was Margo he could always lean in to be with and not have to talk. Being miserable next to your best friend is somehow more helpful than being miserable alone. Nakia was no Margo, nobody could ever compete with his Bambi, but she was frank, had good buzzing herbs and had no interest of going in his pants. So it was as close as he could get. 

‘’Insomnia is the worse, I tell you. ‘’ He teased, trying to put back his signature smile and nonchalant air. He knew she didn’t buy it but played into it.  
‘’How about a game a chess?’’ She asked closing the door of her house. ‘’I have cheese and wine.’’

Eliot wasn’t sure if the healer’s house was bigger or now The Cottage seemed small with a third person living in it. Soon a fourth.  
‘’Please tell me it’s not the cheese from that walking vendor we got from High Town. I think he sold us poop that looked like cheese. ‘’  
‘’I am a healer, I know poison when I see one.’’

She laughs, he smiles, they sat. Both pretending nothing was wrong. Acting like it was normal, he was coming to her house while the last time he did without a warning, was the time he’d beg help for Quentin’s depressive episode. 

She won the first game and was about to win the second one. Usually, Eliot was quite good at chess; life had taught him the hard way to always think of your next move. But right now, he couldn’t concentrate while pushing his demon at bay. He saw the dark skin girl looking at him from time to time, trying to see signs or other non-verbal queues, but he pretended not seeing it. 

‘’Checkmate.’’ She finally said, putting his king in a corner. Oh, Irony.  
‘’You could have made this move three turns ago,’’ Eliot noted finishing his glass of wine.  
‘’Was wondering if you would do something since you haven’t you can’t pretend you are here for the joy of playing games with me.’’ She filled his cup with wine and grabbed a piece of cheese on an apple slice. ‘’Should I ask what is wrong or you need wine and distraction.’’

Eliot chuckle. She was no Margo. But fuck she was close. 

‘’Bit of both’’ He admitted after reflection, realizing that maybe the girl in front of him was a friend after all. 

Nakia took the chess pieces and put them at the starter position. She advanced her pawn then look at him with a grin. 

‘’Then talk, and try to win this time. ‘’ 

And he did. He told her everything. About who he was, where he came from, about Margo, about Ember and Umber about the quest, about Arielle. The healer listen carefully, only asking questions when he was referencing something that hadn’t happen in Fillory yet, or that was an Earth thing he forgot she wouldn’t know. 

He won the third game. 

Both young adults were now finishing the last drop of the bottle, and the food was gone a long time ago. Nakia lit a joint that she gave him while he was in the middle explaining the deal with the fairy Margo had done for him. She lit one for herself as well, still listening. It wasn’t pot that he knew from the taste, but it was one of the herbs that grew only on the Fillorian ground due to its constant need of magic while blooming. He didn’t know the name, but the calming and mind-numbing effect was more than welcome.

‘’Look, I get why you freak out now. ‘’ Nakia said when he finished his story, announcing that Arielle was pregnant. 

From all the things in his life, this was what was making him having a meltdown right now? Retelling your whole story does help to put things in perspective after all. 

‘’And I get that you don’t want to talk to Q about it because he’s in a good mood and just got out of his last melancholia episode, but closing off like that is not good. For yourself and your relationship. ‘’  
‘’Ugh are you about to tell me I have to talk about my feelings with him.’’  
‘’Worse’’ she gasps grabbing her chest ‘’I want you to acknowledge them.’’  
‘’The horror.’’ 

The fit of laughter was mostly due to the drug, but also of relief that he knew what to do. Not that he wanted to. But he’d learn what being in a long-term relationship meant with Quentin; it means hard talks and walking on egos. Even with Mike, he hadn’t understood that sleeping with your partner wasn’t fixing everything. It helped after though. 

It was late into the night when Eliot left Nakia’s house, having refused her offer to stay because he knew this would only complicated things and spike Quentin’s anxiety. His drunken state was gone, but he had still some of the effect of the joint he’d smoke before their fourth and last game of chess. When he saw light coming from the firepit outside of their house, the young man sigh, knowing his life partner was most likely waiting for him despite his wife numerous attempt to bring him back to bed. 

Talking to him was one thing. But he was not in a physical and emotional state to handle him right now. Maybe he should have accepted Nakia’s offer. He started to rehearse what to say to make the discussion happen another day. Different words or tonalities that could avoid a fight about not wanting to fight. God, he missed the time he could fuck his problem away. 

‘’Arielle?’’  
Seeing the young woman, wrapped in a blanket, eating mushrooms from the fire stick she was holding. All he had thought of saying erased from his mind at once. From how the fire looks, this had not been started by magic, meaning Quentin must not even know she was around. A magic fire consumed less wood and was hotter than normal ones. There was a reason for that, but he didn’t care enough to remember what professor Sunderland had told him a lifetime ago. 

‘’ ‘shroom? ‘’ Arielle asked, holding her sick to him, her mouth half full already. 

More by surprise than hunger, he took the fuming mushroom out of the stick. As she put another one to get roasted, he sat down next to her, still drawing a blank on what to do or a say. He’d prepare with Nakia and on his way home for what to say to Quentin and how to handle it. Never the thought of having to face Arielle first. 

‘’ Do you know how to do the marshmallow thing you were talking about last time, ‘’ she asked.  
‘’I honestly don’t know. ‘’ He chuckles, still unsure of the surreal idea of being half stone and eating mushrooms with Quentin’s wife. 

Shit, he should stop seeing her that way. They had a relationship outside of him. Why did he just thought they didn’t anymore? Oh yeah... He remembered, and pushed it far away. 

‘’I put sleeping herbs in Q’s tea tonight. ‘’ She continued, not looking at him. ‘’He was about to have a heart attack and honestly he was too much to handle. ‘’

She scoffed and shook her head.

‘’What kind of mother will I be if I drug someone when he has a panic attack. ‘’ 

Alright. Another thing he didn’t expect or know what to say. And now that he’d eaten the mushroom, he had no excuse to keep his mouth shut. 

‘’Probably, the same kind of dad that flee when he learns about the baby. ‘’ 

He swore he never be that guy. And yet, wasn’t it what he just did? Freak out and on the first opportunity left. Yes, he had a plan to come back, but his father always came back from the bar, and it doesn’t mean all the drunken punch never happen. The more he tried not to be like his dad, the more he seemed to become like him. 

He felt his whole body tremble at the realization and used Quentin’s breathing technique to calm himself down. Arielle had put her blanket around him too, surrounding them both. Her hand pulled his away from his face, and only pride made him not spill the tears he had in his eyes. 

‘’Do you want to talk, eat mushrooms or sleep?’’ She asked after a moment of silence where both of them seemed to share a fear she didn’t know she had. 

Yes, the pregnancy was a surprise, but he always believed she wanted to start a family with Quentin. He knew how much his boyfriend wanted kids too. 

‘’There’s one part of the story we didn’t tell you.’’ Eliot ended up saying, squeezing her hands back. ‘’And before you get angry at Q, it is I who ask him never to tell you because this is a part of my life I am not proud, and I am trying to... fuck I’m trying so hard to pretend it didn’t happen or didn’t end up the way it did.’’

Arielle’s confusion was all he needed to tell her about Fen. Quentin had told everything of their story, but the part where Eliot married a girl to save them, thinking he’d be dead before it ever had true consequence. And when he survived and actually to be a husband how he made little time to explain to her anything. He told her about the war with Loria and how Margo did the impossible bargain with the fairies. They all knew it was out of love that she had done it, but once again, they had put themselves and their survival over Fen, over his unborn child. He told her how he saw his wife coming back from the Fairy realm broken and in so much denial that she’d carry a log to have a sense of maternity love. He told Fray and how he was sure she was not his but the more he spent time with her, the more he cared. Despite every lie, he told himself, how hurt he had been not to see this girl grow and how much he’d crave to have risen her not to be this cold and distant girl but someone is loving and happy like her mother. Fray might not be theirs but Fen believed it, and that’s what matters in the end right? But the real reason why he asked Quentin not to tell her about them, it was because of how he left them; sending them off to one of the busiest and loudest cities in a world that wasn’t theirs with the dumbest human being he ever met. He had done everything to get rid of them so he could be alone with Quentin, for once, and focus on the quest. 

‘’I am trying so hard not to be the husband I was. I want to make an effort for Quentin, for you. But seeing that fucking bunny just brought back everything I did wrong and fuck I am trying so hard to be a better man ‘Elle. ‘’ He was now crying openly in front of her and didn’t mind. It was the second time that day he bares his heart open, and every word felt raw in his throat. After all, last time he had tried to share how scared he was to be a father, the FU Fighter had wanted to kill him. 

Arielle stayed quiet for a moment, holding him, listening, visibly wanting to talk but stopping herself. He appreciated it, unsure if he would have been able to tell everything without it being a monologue. 

‘’ and why there was another fucking bunny?’’ he ended up laughing hungrily, wiping his eyes.  
‘’Well...’’ Said Arielle after a few seconds. ‘’How else can we know if we are pregnant or not? ‘’  
‘’ Wait what?’’ 

Apparently, in Fillory, a pregnancy test was not a thing. When they were not carrying messages, bunnies were announcing the pregnancy and other life-altering news. The fact that it had been a questing beast that did it for Fen was most likely that he was the High King. 

‘’I fucking love Fillory’’ laughed Eliot after the explanation. 

Arielle followed him in his laughter and much-needed release of tension. Eliot felt something warm in his chest. His heart had frozen over the news of the baby, but somehow, realizing how much he loved living in Fillory made it warmer. He had tried for a year to escape it when he was a king, but now that he was in a marriage he agreed on, things felt less like a prison. 

‘’Thank you for telling me this. ‘’ Arielle finally said when their laughter calms down. ‘’But I am not Fen, and the baby isn’t Fray. I know the baby is not biologically yours, but I want you to be its dad as much as Quentin. And we three will be both scared of fucking up and we will, but we won’t be alone in this. At the wedding, we vow to be united as one, and this is what this means. ‘’

Eliot had too much emotion for one day and felt overwhelmed by the one he was feeling right now. He was not sure what it was, and honestly, he didn’t care. He just knew he wasn’t miserable. He’d talk with Quentin tomorrow. But not to tell him that he wasn’t ready to get a fourth person in the house. No, he will say to him how much he loved him, how afraid he was and most likely joke how bad of a contraceptive Nakia’s poultice was.

For now, he just held Arielle, letting the fire die, both of the watching the sun rising on the horizon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im not as happy as I wanted it to be, but I am in a creative wall right now so there you go, its something at least


	19. 18- Quentin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A simple moment in the trio's life

If he were living in a movie or a tv show, this would be the part where things go in fast forward because the same things were happening over and over again; waking up, doing the puzzle, not succeeding, repeat. Of course, there was fights and laughter and sex and other things. But it was not as eventful as the past year has been. 

It has been three months since they learned about the pregnancy and Quentin constant ball of anxiety in his chest was fading out to a mixture of fear and excitement. They had waited to clear things out with Eliot before announcing it to Arielle’s family and, for the first time since he was trapped here, Quentin missed his father. Something told him he would have been as happy as Arielle’s family, more even.

The long-haired boy was distracted since his wife was gone this morning. As always, in the middle of the week, she would sell her peaches to help her family’s farm and stay for dinner at the farm. It was her way to give both of the boys some time together, just like Eliot had started to see Nakia for chess games some nights. Probably one of the deals both of them had made with each other without telling him. The cold season was on its way, and soon Arielle wouldn’t have to do her run every week but every fortnight.

‘’Q she has done the same road for years. Even before we were here. Her being pregnant doesn’t change anything. ‘’ Eliot said when the young boy explained why he was so distracted.  
‘’It’s not that. ‘’ He exclaimed, knowing fully it was him overprotecting her. He tried to cover his cheek blushing by passing a hand in his face. It didn’t seem to fool Eliot. ‘’ We keep seeing soldiers around, and the protection we got from Umber and Ember only apply to the farm and our house, not in between.’’

Lorian had been seen around Barion, and they had visited more than one house in the suburbs. They were still far from them, but Quentin couldn’t stop worrying since Rhys had mentioned the news one night over a dinner. 

‘’You are worrying about that because you want to worry about something. ‘’ Eliot sighed, putting the last yellow tile in a pile next to him.

Quentin put a green to start the next column and didn’t speak, a bit hurt by this statement. Visibly, Eliot seemed to understand his anxiety but now how it wasn’t a choice. It just was. 

‘’What I mean, ‘’ Eliot said sensing Quentin’s tension. ‘’It’s that you are worried about Arielle and you can’t say it’s because of her carrying your child because what kind of a men would you be and also she would never allow you to patronize her that way but you can’t help to worry so you took the first thing that was somewhat a good excuse and focused your anxiety toward it. ‘’

Quentin didn’t speak, trying to process what Eliot had just said. The fact that he was trying to justify to himself how this statement was false, only proved him that his life partner was right. Once again. 

‘’It’s not a bad thing. You did that with The Beast too when you couldn’t cope with your dad and trying to bring back Alice was your way to grieve. As long as you are aware of it, who am I to judge. Usually, I drink my problems away, your coping mechanism is slightly more healthy. ‘’

Quentin looked up, ready to argue about his quest to help Alice, but then he saw the mocking smile of Eliot and knew he shouldn’t make this statement something more significant than it was. Eliot was merely trying to comfort him, and Quentin was oversensitive when he talks about Alice because things had not been cleared out before he disappeared.

‘’Can I have some of your coping mechanism right now?’’ Quentin decided to ask. Eliot laughter warmed the sinking hole in his heart.  
‘’Right away. Let me fix you a drink, can you finish the pattern alone?’’

There was less than a dozen tile left, of course, he was. Eliot chuckled harder at his glare and Quentin couldn’t stop looking at him until he went inside the cottage. Eliot had started to laugh, genuinely laugh, less than a year ago. It wasn’t out of bitterness or irony. It was due to happiness. It made the young magician tear up to think that he might be a little bit the reason why. 

Eliot had been a literal High King, the most influential person in a world. And yet, he found his happiness in sharing a small cottage and living a simpler life. 

Arielle came back a few moments later, complaining of sharp pain in her back that made her cancel dinner with her family, so Quentin took over to make her a bath and let her relax while he drank a sweet cocktail Eliot had made him. His lover’s feet were on his lap, almost entirely lay down on the couch, talking about finishing their design tomorrow and having to look into a better classification system for their previous drawing. 

Eliot made the fillorian stew Arielle had made them at the beginning of their relationship, it had become a favorite of Quentin’s and the time was getting fresher. Even if for this part of the country, it meant sweater season and not the snowing blizzard of the northeast part of Fillory. Arielle was talking to go to Barion see her brother and buy fresh ingredients for the cooking class Eliot had promised Elias during the weekend.

Tranquil night of a quiet life. 

Arielle woke up Quentin by moving so much next to him in the bed and, seeing him open his eyes she left the bed. Quentin didn’t have time to ask a question that her lips were on his and she ordered him to go back to bed. His brain was already half sleeping, he complied, rolling over to wrap himself around Eliot. 

When Quentin woke up, Arielle was already on the stove, getting breakfast ready and sent him back to bed for more time with Eliot. The dark-haired man was impossible to wake up, and Quentin sat in the bed, playing with his hair, wondering how they will both cope with having to wake up at dawn for another reason than insomnia or anxiety.

Soon they will both be fathers, and even the puzzle might have to be put in the background of their life to teach a new human how to live. The idea that Quentin manages to create a whole human being with Arielle was as overwhelming as it was fascinating. 

‘’Is ‘Elle doing bacon?’’ asked Eliot, his head still in the pillow, voice still groggy from sleep.  
‘’Think so. ‘’ Chuckled Quentin. ‘’ By the smell of it its bacon and boiled egg day today.’’  
‘’God can I marry her.’’  
‘’Too late, I got there first.’’  
‘’Dammit.’’

Eliot was pulling on Quentin boxer so he would lean for a kiss and it was shameful how he was already half hard from the simple presence of Eliot’s long and robust finger so near his waistline. Without hesitation, both boys kissed each other good morning and were getting involved in a bit of more tongue work and hands exploration when a cry of Arielle stopped them within seconds. 

‘’ Quentin! Eliot! Help!’’  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay I was super busy lately, I will be trying to update a bit more this week! Hope you like it!


	20. 19- Arielle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arielle hurt.

Arielle could hear Nakia talk to Quentin and Eliot outside the house. Even with the window closed due to the freshness of the air, it felt like they were wide open when the healer explained what happens. She could hear the silence that ensued between and her husband tears muffled by his boyfriend body, most likely holding him in his arm. Its when she heard Quentin cries than Arielle started to cry to, since then it hadn’t stopped.

She was alone in a large bed made for three, blood-soaked towels were now in a tub away from her, Nakia had changed the sheets before she left, and there was nothing that could make her pain go away.

A miscarriage she said, it happened more often than we think. The healer made sure to say at least twice every minute that it was alright, that she will get a second look up once she had rest, which she was not in danger of dying. What Nakia didn’t understand is that the moment she realized her baby was gone, Arielle’s heart died too.

As afraid and nervous she had been at the prospect of being a mother, she adores the idea that her love with Quentin was so loud they had created something, someone, entirely new. And yet, not even at the end of her first trimester, the baby was gone off her belly, and she wasn’t a mother. Eliot and Quentin were not fathers. How could she do anything but cry?

She felt someone entering the room and take her into its arm; she did not stop crying. From the feel of it, it was Quentin’s. It smelled like him too. The surprise calmed her down. She’d expected her husband to be too overpowered by his emotion to be with her. Not that it was a complain, she knew how emotional he could be from time to time, how his nerve won over his mind more than once. She expected him to be the one who comforts more than her. But no. He was there, holding her, a hand rubbing her back, telling her how much he loved her and to please calm down.

When she did, she managed to look at her husband who was still silently crying. But he had the strength to come and be in pain with her. Looking into his eyes and despite living one of the harshest moment of her life, Arielle felt overwhelmed by love. She kissed him, and his answer was part surprised, part passionate. Like he wanted to remind her that he loved her, no matter what. She knew she'd need more convincing than that to feel like she hadn’t failed him. But he showed up, once again, when she needed it and was too scared to ask for help. Just like at the funeral when she saw him and knew at that moment that she was deeply head over heels for him.

Eliot came later on with tea and assured her he was ready to fix her a drink if it what she wanted. This had put a small smile on her lips, and she accepted the offer. Twenty minutes later, he came back with cocktails whose name she forgot. The three of them drank it in the bed, Arielle tucked between both men, Quentin surrounding her with his arm and Eliot tracing patterns on her legs. They were broken but broken together.

Eliot suggested that she went to her sister tomorrow. The idea of having a bit of comfort from her family did warm her heart, but Delilah had given birth and seeing a four months old seemed the knife in the wound she didn’t need. Both men agreed.

‘’We need to change your ideas. ‘’ Said Eliot, still wanting to find an impossible cure for the void in her heart. It made her wonder if that was how he was coping with his pain. It would explain all that drinking.  
‘’I just need this, ‘’ Arielle assured, putting her head against her husband’s shoulder. ‘’both of you here. That’s what I need right now. ‘’

She felt Quentin’s lips on her head and knew she should ask how he was handling the news, but to be fair, she didn’t have the courage nor the emotional capacity. And what was the use of a polyamory marriage if the third partner wasn’t there when one of them couldn’t show up.

‘’I was thinking of going to the Blooming Festival this year so that you could have some time with Q’’ Eliot continued as he didn’t hear her. ‘’But it would be nice to go altogether.’’  
‘’The Blooming Festival?’’ Quentin asked, puzzled.  
‘’Wait. Do I, Eliot Waugh, know something about Fillory that High Nerd Quentin Coldwater doesn’t?’’

Eliot laughter and Quentin banter were probably a bit forced. But it made her smile a bit. For a second, the void was filled with a warmth that only love could create. She fell asleep as both boys were bickering about who was the most muscular nerd of all. Talking about anything but why they were cuddling in a bed.

She woke up in the middle of the night, tangled between both men. It would have been a lovely thing to wake up to if it wasn’t for the horrible back pain and cramp she was having. Nakia had warned her the potion she took might have effects for a few days at her body was getting rid of everything it had created for the baby. She could feel the clothes she had in her underwear was soak through and some drip of red liquid was creeping her leg. Not wanting to worry the boys and need to be alone in this shameful state, she tried to get out of the bed as gently as she could and went to draw herself the warmest bath Eliot’s faucet could conjure. She threw away the cloth that was tucked in her underwear, knowing there was no way of reusing it. Especially after seeing the dark clots that she hoped were only dried blood. There was a dark spot on her nightgown but this, she wanted to try to salvage. Money was not a problem living with Eliot and Quentin, but she was raised in a large family that had made her conscious of waste.

‘’ ‘Elle? ‘’ said a groggy voice at the door followed by Quentin opening it, holding a candle not to stumble into the night. ‘’Is everything okay?’’

She knew she should say yes and bit him to go back to bed where Eliot could protect him from the world. But she was hurting, selfish and needed him right now.

‘’ cramps. ‘’ she decided to say, unable to explain everything.  
‘’I saw blood on the sheets, it got me worried.’’ Quentin sat next to the bath, putting the candle far away for the face to be half hidden by shadows. Arielle hopes this hid the tears in her eyes.  
‘’Sorry, I… I’ll wash them, or buy some tomorrow..’’

She didn’t have the strength to finish her sentence without a sob escaping her mouth, and Quentin put a hand on her back as she tucked her legs on her chest.

‘’Hey, it’s okay, it’s not your fault. ‘’ He whispered like she was a wounded animal.  
‘’It is. ‘’ She argued, hiding her face with her knee, shivering at her husband gentle touch. ‘’I am so sorry Quentin. I - ‘’  
‘’I’ll stop you right there.’’ he interrupted. ‘’This is not your fault, nor mine. Nor anyone. This baby was not meant to happen. And it sucks and it hurts, and we will cry over it. ‘’

She felt the soft hand of her husband pull over her chin, forcing her to look at him. He had those sad eyes of his that were filled with love and sadness at the same time, and it broke her heart. She loved him so much, and the fact that she was the reason he was in pain was killing part of her soul.

Their lips found each other because words were not enough to express what they both felt. By the end of the kiss, Quentin was half leaning over the bath. He kissed her forehead, her nose, and her lips before sitting back down next to her.

‘’The only thing I can say about this,’’ Quentin said as he started to wash her with a damp cloth. ‘’It’s that despite all the drama before, the fact that the three of us are hurting means something.’’

Arielle looked at him, trying to stay grounded in the present by focusing on his hand scribbling her and not letting her mind drift away in a void of sadness.

‘’It means that we wanted that kid after all.’’ he continued, a small smile on his face. ‘’So let’s take time to heal from this, and let’s try to have another one.’’

Arielle kneeled on the bath, splashing water all over the ground and some on her husband, her heart swelling with thousand of emotion she was not sure she could name them, even less full process them. She had been so sure those past few days she was going to be dismissed by her husband for her incapacity of providing an heir. She was so sure they would be mad at her for failing at her duty. And instead, Eliot was planning a getaway to change her mind, and Quentin was ready to try again. Not seeing her as a failure, but seeing the miscarriage as an accident of nature.

She realized how much she was blessed by the Gods to have been given those two men in her life. Nobody she knew in Fillory would have that reaction, and yet, here she was.

‘’Yes.’’ She said, crying from happy tears this time. ‘’ let’s try again.’’

The hardest had been to tell her family. Despite their love and support, she couldn’t help to get rid of the deep shame of saying the pregnancy was over. Her father seemed to take it harder than her husband which annoyed intensely. She understood how sad it was, but he had other grandchildren, and it wasn’t like this lead to her death or anything significant. She was devasted, yes, but there were stories of miscarriage that were ten times more awful and worth those tears. She was almost happy the boys and here were leaving the day after, so she wouldn’t see her father come into the cottage from time to time to be sure she was alright. Or worse, having Delilah come to cheer her up while holding her baby.

She knew this anger toward her family was unfair and she was transferring her pain toward them, but it still felt good to vent to her husband while he was doing the mosaic with Eliot.

And as promised, the day after, they rented a cart and drove away toward Brightheaven, the nearest town near Whitespire, if you were not counting High Town which was where nobles and working staff at the castle were living. This reminded her that, in their past, that was actually the future, both boys were king of this land. It was an image she was unable to put into her head; Eliot as a High King, Quentin as king. She only knew them having a simple, quiet life in a small house in the middle of nowhere. The idea that they could have a busy life, living in a castle, having the fate of a whole country on their shoulder seemed impossible. She would never tell them, but none of them had the emotional stability for this.

The ride was to take all day, so they decided to stop mid-journey to have something to eat and get some water for the horse. Both boys had been in the front seat all that time, and Arielle had fallen asleep, trying to pretend her cramps were not as painful as they were. She did have to change the towel in her underwear when she looked, but at least, the blood wasn’t as intense, soon it would look like her regular monthly bleeding.

The Hem’s teeth were one of the largest and highest chains of mountains of the land. From her farm, she could even see the highest peak but still, seeing it so close it was strange to see some mountain’s top disappearing into the sky or having eternal snow on it. She didn’t know if anyone tried to climb it and she knew she should care and listen to Quentin’s explanation over their picnic. But she was getting cold, she was eating to do something, and she felt nothing. It wasn’t the usual void anymore. It was this sudden nothingness. She wanted to care. Seeing her husband so excited and blushing under Eliot’s tease was something she always loved about him, and yet, she was looking at both men and felt like a stranger.

Because she was. She was a fillorian that forced her way into their life because they were stuck in here. She always saw this as fate. Maybe it was the contrary. The Gods were cursing her for being with people that were not supposed to exist.

Back in the cart, she put her winter cloak, knowing it was only going to get colder. She should force both boys to do the same when they refused, knowing they will catch a cold, but she didn’t have the heart. She put it next to them and went back to lay in the cart, after a moment she pretended to sleep, so she didn’t have to engage with the world.

Maybe that trip was not a good thing after all.

‘’… she didn’t even pray before lunch’’ Quentin’s voice said, waking her up

Visibly, pretending to sleep and the slow motion of the ride made her indeed fall asleep. She was catching a conversation both boys were waiting to have when she was not listening. She frowned a bit. Did she forgot to pray before starting to eat?

‘’I know. ‘’ Eliot sighed. ‘’Remind me to make a joke about how we are corrupting her later.’’  
‘’Yeah.’’

Their voice was sad and low and break her heart. That, she could still fill.

‘’But to answer your question, ‘’ continued Eliot ‘’ no I don’t think its depression. It’s more.. oh shit. You know what her attitude makes me think of?’’  
‘’Hm?’’  
‘’Margo in Brakebill South. She went full on a blank. Went through the motion, did her thing, fucked a lot, managed not to kill Miakovsky and went back home. The moment she was back in the cottage, she broke down for a solid week, then pretended nothing happen. I tried to poke the subject but understood quickly she didn’t want to talk about it anymore, so I let it go. That’s how it always worked with Bambi and me.’’

‘’Healthy.’’

‘’Isn’t it?’’ laughed Eliot sadly. ‘’Anyway, I think she’s just dissociating. Like hurting so much, she makes herself not feel. Y’know?’’  
‘’Oh…. Yeah. ‘’

There was a long silence that seemed full of many memories from a world they were unable to do. From their story, Arielle remembered Margo had been crucial to Eliot. His sister or something? She forgot, there had been so many names that night. She didn’t understand all the reference of Eliot story but is conclusion pointed out something entirely right. She could now feel the wall she was putting around her heart.

‘’I think we need a beer and a good conversation when we are at the inn.’’ Arielle finally said, which made both men jump comically.

Quentin turned, his long hair hiding part of his face, a sad smile on his lips. She wasn’t sure the blush was from getting caught into a discussion about her or because it was colder by the minute.

‘’Yeah, that’s a good idea.’’ He said.

Arielle tried to kneel in the moving cart, almost falling over and shoved both cloaks into her husband hand.

‘’Now you two put that on you now before I make you. ‘’

She tried to make it sound like a joke, but the walls around her heart were still there. She wasn’t sure if it came across the right way, but at least, now she had both her men protected and won’t have to take care of them when they would catch a cold.

********  
Eliot was downstairs getting drinks and something to eat, insisting they eat in their room. Arielle wasn’t sure if he was expecting her making a scene but not having to mingle with a large amount of traveler seemed the best idea right now.

Soaked in a bath, she let Quentin wash her hair because he probably felt he had to do the same thing she did for him when he was not doing so great. She didn’t need that help, but having his hand touching her scalp and combing her hair felt so intimate, something warm sparked for a second inside her stomach. Alright. Maybe she needed his help after all.

There was a light snowstorm outside, so she decided to put a comfy pajama and go to see Quentin who was seated near the window. She went to his lap and made herself as little as possible so he could wrap his arm around her and sigh at his kiss on her head.

‘’Thank you. It was a nice bath.’’ She said after a moment, enjoying the snow dancing into the air.

Arielle had seen snow before, but it rarely fell in the region of Fillory they were. Even when it did, it didn’t even last a day. So seeing so many piling up was quite a spectacle. Noticing her shivers, Quentin started the fireplace with a few movements of fingers

‘’Do you have snow on Earth?’’ She ended up asking, not knowing what to say but wanting to keep the conversation going. She felt like when she was a child at her house, and all the older people were talking, and she wanted to participate but couldn’t understand their discussion fully. She ended up asking questions just because it was one way to have their attention and be included.

‘’Oh yes. ‘’ laughed Quentin, pulling her closer. ‘’ Well, not everywhere, but where Eliot and I come from, there’s snow. ‘’  
‘’Is it as wet and cold as here. ‘’  
‘’More, cause there I always end up falling on an ice patch and soaking myself in the snow. ‘’  
‘’You think he’s exaggerating but I’ve seen him, it’s true. ‘’ Eliot's voice chimed from the door.

The couple, laughing, looked over. Eliot was carrying a large plate with cheese and three large drink. Arielle got out of Quentin’s lap to help, but her husband was faster.

‘’ They’ll bring the meal when it’s ready. ‘’ Said Eliot kissing Quentin’s cheek.

Arielle took her mug that was full of beer and smile. Her boys were fond of wine and hard alcohol, having a simple beer was quite refreshing. The three of them sat at the table and drank, a silence lingering between them. This time, Arielle didn’t feel like asking a question to continue the discussion. Despite trying to break away the wall around her heart, it felt safer to go back there then acknowledge anything.

‘’Look ‘Elle, Q, and I are the last person that can blame you to push us away while you hurt. ‘’ Eliot said after a moment, putting his drink down and taking her hands. The moment she put her drink down, Quentin took the freed hand and squeezed it. ‘’Just, tell us what you need, and we’ll try to give it to you. Cause frankly we have no fucking clue what to do. ‘’

Quentin nodded and Arielle bit her lips, lowering her eyes a moment, lost in her thought. Pushing back against the instinct to say she was alright and she needed rest. Because that what she would have done at home, so the younger kids wouldn’t worry, so her dad wouldn’t miss a day in the field. But she wasn’t at the farm anymore; she had to remind herself that.

‘’I don’t know either. ‘’ She said after a moment, looking up. ‘’Honestly, something clicked when I heard you saying something like I was making myself feel nothing instead of everything. I didn’t notice that what I was doing, that’s what I always did back home. Even when Eamon died, the only time I cried is when I saw you. My family needed me to be strong despite my pain. And… I guess part of me felt that my new family wanted me to do the same thing. ‘’

Quentin did that thing with his eyes where they look sad but so full of love and comprehension. Puppy eyes Eliot called them. Another spark went into her stomach. He was so handsome, even like this.

‘’You don’t have to be,’’ Quentin said. ‘’I mean, if you want to push it through, it’s okay too! But don’t feel like you have to pretend around Eliot and I. Ever. ‘’

Eliot nodded and took his drink in a grand gesture, his hands raised in the air.

‘’ _I_ am the drama queen in the relationship. ‘’ He said in the funniest fake accent she ever heard. It sounded like the snob people that were working in Whitespite and love to tell everyone about it.  
‘’Drama queen?’’ laughed Arielle, smiling fondly at Quentin who kissed her hand before letting it go and grabbing his drink.  
‘’Earth expression. ‘’ He explained. ‘’It means making everything bigger than normal. Stop that smile Eliot this is not a penis joke.’’

The rest of the night ended up in laughter and good food. Arielle knew the boys were trying hard to make her smile and she truly appreciated their effort. The walls were still there, but there were holes in them where a bit of light was coming through.

_We can try again_. She reminded herself later during the night, as she was falling asleep against Quentin’s heart. And this time, the baby will be wanted. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what do you mean i projected my own dissociation to Arielle *rolls away*  
> happier chapter to come soon, i promise


	21. 20- Quentin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loosing the baby created a new dynamic in the trio that Q isn't sure to be able to handle

On the coldest weeks of winter, the Snow Trees and the Moonlights flower bloom in the fields in the eastern part of Fillory. Only growing when the air was crisp and the ground frozen, they would get their peak that week. During the day, the Snow Trees would bloom its fruits and merchant would harvest its fruits, Snowlites, to sell, bake and give away. Herbalist and healer would wait for the moon to appear to pluck the open Moonlight Flower and its seed. They were crucial in many, and it was told that it could cure almost anything. 

The fact that Quentin never heard of it in any Fillory and Further books was quite surprising considering Eliot had told him that it was a significant event for many Fillorian. He even had indulged to see the blooming with Fen who had been eager to go. He only had accepted because he needed his approval rate to rise, everyone was gone to Earth which made the castle too big for his taste and, he knew he was awful to his new wife so he should do something kind for her. 

Brighthaven had put decoration everywhere, and merchants were open late so the travelers that were coming for those few weeks, could spend their money. There were barrels with flames so people could warm up in the street. Bards were signing from everywhere. People were laughing. It was an actual scene of a movie. And yet, Quentin was looking at it in real life, trying to remember this view forever. God, he misses his phone for times like that, how much he wished he could take video and picture of this moment. Of the streets. Of the light snow falling on tourist. Of Arielle laughing as Eliot was telling her a story. 

Quentin took a moment to appreciate the sight of Arielle, still pale with bags under her eyes, but now with lights in her laugh and glow on her cheek. After the talk last night and the day she spent in bed while he and Eliot went to do some shopping, she seemed truly better. Acknowledging pain and continuing to live was the hardest thing to do, but she was trying. And he was working for her as well. Eliot was fixing her earmuff he’d bought her earlier in the day, and he could have given everything that he had so he could take a picture of those two at that moment. Eliot, handsome, happy and caring. Arielle, magnificent, happy and loving. 

He was in love. And he was fucking happy.

“Honey, are you listening?” Arielle said, putting her arm around his.   
“Absolutely not” he admitted sheepishly. 

Eliot rolled his eyes and crossed his arm. 

“ I was asking if you two wanted time together.”He said, ” Arielle keep telling I can come but I can’t tell if it’s out of guilt or because she is starting to like me.”  
“Hey! You know I adore you ‘El. “ protested Arielle which made Eliot laugh because every time he teased her on that subject, she bites. 

Quentin had to admit that some time alone with Arielle would be nice but, if they were here in the first place, it was because of Eliot ideas. And to be honest, since she arrived at The Cottage, some time alone just between the two boys was becoming a rarity. The long-haired boy was always trying to manage his time equally between the two of them, but it was becoming harder. And the baby wouldn’t have help. 

“He’s overthinking” Eliot whispered loudly to Arielle who nodded.   
“Yep. I blame you.”  
“It was a simple question.”  
“You know the boy feel guilty every time he spends time alone with one another. Don’t torture him.”

Usually Quentin like when they talked about him like he wasn’t there. It was one of his best turn on in bed, and God do they knew it. But this time, it was more annoying than anything. 

“I’m not...” he started but stopped at the sharp look both his lovers gave him. It was almost comical to see them doing the same thing in such synchronicity.   
“I’d like some time alone. “ Finally said, Arielle. “ Maybe you could see the blooming together tomorrow, and I’ll stay at the inn.”  
“ Sure,” Eliot said, happy to have a decision finally. He kissed her forehead like he always did then came and kissed Quentin on the mouth.

It was too quick for Quentin’s taste, but making out in public wasn’t a favorite of his anyway.

“Thank you.” He said going back to kiss Eliot rapidly, which made the older boy glow with happiness.   
“You know we won’t go to the blooming tomorrow right? “  
“I don’t expect to be alone with you for more than five minutes before you start pulling out my clothes.”  
“Five minutes? You are generous.”

Both boys laughed, kissed one last time, and Eliot left him alone with Arielle. His eyes linger on his partner who was walking toward the inn alone, trying to pretend there wasn’t a bit of guilt building up in his stomach. 

“We can call him back if you want. “ Arielle said, rubbing his arm. 

Quentin looked at her, and her small smile betrayed probably the same guilt he was feeling. This put a stone in his stomach. They were here to make her feel better, and he should stop being selfish and focus on her. Especially when she just requested to be alone with him. Trying to warm up his smile, he took her in his arm and put a long and loving kiss against her lips, loving how she answered it within seconds. 

The blooming was one of the most beautiful things he saw in his life, right after seeing Arielle in a bride’s dress. 

They went back to The Cottage after a few days in Brightheaven. As marvelous the view was, there was so much you can do while looking at flower blooms and people doing their work around it. The escape had been a pleasant thought, and Quentin had to admit Eliot had a stroke of genius by proposing it. 

Arielle was still bleeding so they dropped her at Nakia’s house before going to give back the cart to a neighbor they had rented it. If there was one thing both boys didn’t like to talk, it was Arielle’s menstruation. The walk to the house was a bit long, but they held hands, and it was nice to think that they were in a place in time and their relationship, that this wasn’t weird or loaded with unsaid feelings. It was just a typical gesture of a regular couple. 

After the harsh cold of Brighthaven, the pure cold breeze of the night felt like a blessing and soon, both boys were undoing their cloak and shove their winter outfit away. This lead to Eliot undressing more than necessary, which lead to Quentin following him. Soon enough, the younger boy was on his knee, taking his partner erection in his mouth and moaning at the taste. He could feel himself grow harder as Eliot put a hand in his hair and tugged it slightly. 

He gasps and turned his head when he heard a door close, but Eliot pulled his hair harder and Quentin looked up to a stern and lustful Eliot. He saw Arielle giving him a peck on the cheek before she looked at him and frowned. 

‘’Who told you to stop’’ she said in this authoritative voice that drove him insanely hard. 

Quentin closed his eyes and continued to play with his tongue around his lover erection. 

‘’You can finish him. I’m not in a mood today.’’ He heart Arielle said.   
‘’Everything alright?’’ Eliot asks with a quite impressive steady voice for someone who was getting sucked laboriously.   
‘’Yes, still need a bit of time. I’ll be reading outside, call me when its time to make dinner.’’

Eliot said something, and a door closed, Quentin felt Eliot tugging his hair harder, sign for him to stop. The long-haired boy looked up, popping out the erection from his mouth slick with Eliot’s fluid

‘’You heard the miss, she’s reading, so you gotta be quiet,’’ Eliot said

Quentin nodded, wondering how those two always manage to find a way to make him so submissive and ready, yet in full control of the scene. They said they never planned before, but it was hard to believe sometime. 

‘’ Get the scarf, something tells me you won’t listen.’’  
‘’I will! I won’t be loud.’’  
‘’Oh so now you think you can answer back?’’

The flash in Eliot’s eyes made him understand he was in lustful trouble. 

‘’Sorry.’’ He said in a boyish voice that made Eliot hair on his leg rise up.   
‘’Sorry what?’’  
‘’Sorry sir.’’

Eliot bent and kissed him softly as a reward. Quentin wanted so much to bite his lips and beg to be ravished, but he knew the more he asked for it, the less he will be allowed to. 

‘’The scarf now. ‘’

Quentin nodded at Eliot’s order and went into the room to get the scarf and wait on the bed while Eliot was rummaging through their luggage for the lubricant. He was painfully hard and wanted to jerk off just by the sight of a naked and fully erected Eliot, showing his ass perfectly, taking his sweet fucking time. This was on purpose for sure. He was about to give in -consequence to be damn- when his lover came in the room and closed the door behind him. 

The scarf didn’t make him less loud than usual. 

Time continued to pass, and slowly the trio got their routine back together. The boys were making a new pattern of the puzzle every day. Arielle was selling peaches, sewing and keeping their garden greener than it ever was. Elias had started to come once every week and get a cooking lesson from Eliot; he had to do most of the bakery for the farm now and had developed a talent that was only growing now. Usually, Quentin and Arielle left them alone, taking this time to be together. Sometimes staying outside of the house, eating and talking, sometimes walking through the forest or going to the rainbow river. It took a few months before they use that time as well to try to make a baby. Sex had always been great with her, but knowing that it was more than for pleasure always felt strange at the beginning. It took Quentin wife a few long kisses and caress to calm him now and enjoy the softness of her curves. 

Quentin started to see more and more that Eliot was trying to give them time together, but Arielle was doing the same for them. It felt now he rarely had a night the three of them. Not only a threesome but also just a simple night where the three of them would hang out. He tried not to be too upset by it, but it clearly showed one day because Eliot asked about it when he told him he was going to play chess with Nakia that night. 

‘’Did something happen between you and Arielle that you are hiding from me?’’ Quentin asked, placing the tile on the puzzle.   
‘’Why are you saying that?’’ his life partner asked, audibly surprised. 

Quentin kept the blue tile in his hand and looked at Eliot dark eyes, trying to see something he missed. 

‘’You two are a bit avoiding each other. It’s either time with you or time with her. We are rarely together anymore. ‘’   
‘’I just thought that’s what you wanted. With trying to have a baby and all? Do you really want me around when you sleep with her? ‘’  
‘’It never bothered you before.’’  
‘’It was not the same before.’’  
‘’How?’’ 

Quentin's hand were so tight around the tile that he felt it dig into his flesh and felt the familiar sensation of something cutting him. When Eliot's eyes went on it, he released the tile which fell slowly on the floor, a bit of blood was now painting the center of his palm. 

‘’It’s not just sex anymore Q. Even you told me that.’’Sighed Eliot, taking Quentin’s hand and doing a simple pattern with his finger over it, closing the small wound. ‘’And I don’t think I should be there. The kid is your project with Arielle. I think she feels it too and tries to give us time together when she can. We always had an unspoken agreement about sharing you that way. ‘’ 

He linked their finger together and kissed his hand before looking at Quentin. The younger man heart was beating with anxiety as too many emotions were overflowing him; anger, incomprehension, sadness, love. 

‘’The kid will be yours as well El’ you know that. ‘’ he finally said in a small voice. ‘’You know that right? I…. I thought you wanted it too? If you don’t we….’’

Eliot stopped Quentin from spiraling with a kiss full of unspoken words. An I love you but shut up kind of kiss. He felt his lover hand going to his neck, something that always made him shiver, and answered the kiss ten times more passionate. 

‘’I’ll be scared to be a father until I have to be one. You know that.’’ Eliot said, putting his forehead on Quentin’s. ‘’And I know we will do this together. You don’t have to remind me that long talk we got at first. ‘’

Quentin laughed at the memory and kissed him quickly, putting his head back where it was before. 

‘’I don’t want you two to see me as something you have to share. I adore having time separately with both of you, but I also love the time we spend the three together. Maybe with the baby, it won’t happen as much you know?’’ 

Eliot nodded at Quentin’s remark, something in his eyes had a spark now. With time, the younger man had discovered that this light appeared went Eliot was thinking of how much they were in love. They kissed a long time, a mixture of lust and desire. 

‘’I’ll talk to ‘Elle when’s she’s back from town, ‘’ promised Eliot 

Quentin beamed and took the tile he’d drop earlier, trying to calm down as his heart was still beating hard and fast. He was feeling too much emotion again. But this time, they were positive. 

They got a bunny announcing Arielle’s pregnancy four months later, the day of their fourth anniversary in Fillory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the wait! Hope you enjoyed the chapter  
> x


	22. 21- Quentin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ghost of past relations creeps between Quentin and Eliot

Every time one of them went into town, going to a bookstore became mandatory. Not only Arielle was an avid reader, but the boys had discovered that from time to time, some merchant would have magical books. Mostly spells or rituals that they knew already, but having those book in their bookshelf had started to make them feel a bit more like home. After all, it was hard not to stumble upon one when you are at Brakebills. The boy spent many nights redoing spells they had to learn in the first year or at Brakebills South, Arielle looking at each of them with a wonder that made Quentin remember that once, magic had this effect on him too. 

There was a time, a lifetime ago, where doing magic seemed so beautiful and full of potential. But when you get to the reality of it, it is hard, rarely stable and caused as much problem as it was fixing it. Yet, he couldn’t help to feel a warmth in his chest while seeing the stars in the eyes of his wife while he was doing rainbow line into the air. Next, to her, he felt special. He was becoming proud of being a magician. And a good one. With Eliot’s help they had started to do small wonder in the cottage and, without the constant remembering that Alice and Julia were much better than him, Quentin felt more confident. Even Eliot had noted a change over the weeks. 

The day they found a spell to turn an object into a rain-making system, the boys had started their calculation to create a shower system with it. Arielle had to physically lure Quentin to bed or blackmail Eliot into stopping what he was doing; otherwise she will go make dinner herself. But looking at the circumstance and the magical energy of an object was a nice change from the dulling task of doing a puzzle again and again and again. 

It took three weeks to build a water system and do a cooperative spell that finally created the first Fillorian shower. While Arielle had to warm up to the idea, Quentin first shower had lasted a long time. It was a first in four years and fuck he had missed it. His wife did like it when she finally agrees to try it. And Eliot kept telling they should show her the beauty of shower sex. But knowing his talent, Quentin knew he’d only fell or hurt her, which was the contrary of arousing. Plus, he wanted to do everything he could to protect his wife. 

Arielle calls him overprotective, Quentin liked to think he was merely preventive. Truth is the moment the trio learned about her second pregnancy; it became clear that she needed to rest as much as possible. They had decided not to tell anyone until she was long into it and the risk of miscarriage was reduced. She had argued quite strongly with him when he said her she shouldn’t do her weekly round of selling her father’s peaches. Eliot ended up convincing her by reminding her the harvest season was gone and they only needed to do it every other week, and Elias needed work that wasn’t on the farm. The more time the youngest Lanclair spent at The Cottage, the more apparent it became that he was not meant for a life of farming. 

So Arielle was not allowed to do a massive work and, by the fourth month, she was going already crazy. Quentin tried to send her to her sister or do small errands in town as much as he could, but he knew his wife was not the type to sit and do nothing all day. That was part of why he loved her. She was his driving force in days were being active was harder. The only idea he came up to occupy her days were things that would work on Earth, where internet and Netflix was a thing. He ended up digging around the puzzle so she could make a bigger garden. Tending to it was one of her favorite activity even before, so it as a compromise they both agreed. She always sang or hummed when she worked, which delighted the boys more than they would ever admit out loud. When she was around, her voice replaces their bickering about tiles and patterns of an impossible puzzle. 

There were time patterns would be involved to the point that the boys worked through the night until they were done. They use to do full nights in the beginning; not sleeping for 63 hours was their all-time record. But having a third person to consider had tame this habit. Though some night they went back, Arielle going to bed without them. 

Tonight, she had decided to stay outside, lying on the outside bed and talking with them, going through their magic book and asking questions when she didn’t understand a concept, most likely related to an earth thing that Fillory didn’t have. When she became quiet, Quentin had to look her way and saw her fast asleep with the book still open. 

‘’You know, I never saw you made that face with anyone else’’ Eliot said, looking at Quentin with a smile, drinking his flask.   
‘’What face?’’ Quentin wondered, snapping his attention to his boyfriend. ‘’I don’t make a face.’’  
‘’Yes you do. You have a unique expression when you look at her. It’s adorable. ‘’

Quentin was puzzled, trying to remember what kind of look he had a few seconds before. This made laugh Eliot who kissed him. 

‘’You’re just still in love with her, and it’s nice to see. ‘’ Eliot teased giving him his flask. 

Quentin accepted it and drank, knowing that he implied the miscarriage and stress of the few last months had been hard on all of them. Especially in the beginning when he tried not to slip in his usual self-loathing and depressive state because he knew his wife needed him. It was one of the first time he won against himself, but he was still scared to get an echo back. 

Both boys stayed silent for a moment, letting the last pile of tile untouched, their mind wandering in many thought. The silence was not something Eliot liked. And yet, they were comfortable with it together. 

‘’I love you too. ‘’ Quentin reminded him.   
‘’I know, it wasn’t a jealous jab. It’s just talking about the light bending spell made me think of Alice. And I realized you never looked at her the way you are with ‘Elle. ‘’ 

Quentin frown, his heart sinking. He didn’t like what Eliot implied. Yes, his relation with Alice had been passionate and brief, but it had been real. He loved her, even after she rejected him over and over again. If he was honest with himself, part of him resisting to Arielle was the hope to go back to Earth and get Alice. He had to accept that he will never see her again. He will never be able to help her find a way back. 

‘’Shit Q, I didn’t mean… ‘’ Eliot said, realizing what he just said.   
‘’No it’s okay. ‘’ Quentin said coldly.   
‘’It’s clearly not.’’

Quentin put the tile he held on the pile between them, it made it unstable and the dozen of ceramic square spread all over the floor. 

‘’The difference, it's you never liked Alice, you like Arielle,’’ he muttered angrily trying to redo the pile.   
‘’It’s not true.’’

The look Quentin gave him was cold and angry. Because he knew he was right. , and she only was accepted in their group because of him. The only person Eliot cared about was and will always be Margo. Now that she was out of the picture, he had to rely on something less but still charming: him. Alice was never a part of Eliot story. Ever. 

‘’I’m going to take a shower, let’s finish this tomorrow. My back hurt.’’ 

He didn’t let Eliot say something before he got up and went into the house. The only reason he didn’t slam the door was that Arielle was sleeping. There was not enough warm water in Fillory to calm him down, but he stayed under the water long enough for his finger to start pruning. He opened the small window in the room so the thick blanket of steam would clear.

He didn’t expect to hear Arielle’s voice coming from it., 

‘’I think part of him still loves her ‘el. ‘’ Arielle was saying, most likely calming Eliot who woke her up. The girl was pregnant and needed sleep! Not to comfort the wounded heart of a selfish man. ‘’He had to forget any possibility of a relationship with her, it doesn’t mean the feelings he had toward her are gone.’’  
‘’You are not jealous?’’  
‘’It’s not like she’s a threat here isn’t?’’  
‘’Maybe she never was for you.’’

This makes Quentin pause in his hair brushing. Did Eliot ever saw Alice as competition? This was nonsensical! When they came back from Brakebill South, he had a boyfriend then was way too depressing to have any kind of positive emotion about love and later got married to save their life. Never Eliot had shown interest in him before.

Alright, that wasn’t true. Both boys had been doing a silent game of cat and mouse and their separation when magic got severed, and they didn’t know the bunny system, had only amplified the fact that they had feelings for each other. Whatever they were. But to a point where he saw Alice as competition? Quentin never thought he even had a chance with Eliot, that's why he never hope for something bigger. That’s why it took him a year to get the courage to kiss him when they got stuck here at first. 

And now they were somewhat married. Life partner. Forever. 

‘’ Plus, Quentin’s love is big and strong. ‘’ Continued Arielle soft voice. ‘’I know he loves me. Like he loves you. I don’t know that Alice, but he probably still loves her too. I think you are the one jealous of her.’’  
‘’ I am not...’’

How come a Fillorian that never met Alice understood more what was between them than both boys were. Chuckling and putting his pajama pants, Quentin's heartfelt a rush of butterflies he thought in the first time he had starting courting her. 

‘’Shut up and give me the wine.’’ 

When he wakes up the morning after, Eliot was already gone off the bed, there was a smell of breakfast in the air, and Arielle was snuggled against him and yet manage to take the rest of the bed for herself. He quietly got out of the bedroom and went to see Eliot cooking his famous crepes. Usually, they were for a special occasion. It was probably his way to apologize about last night. Even if they talked it out before bed, there was still an awkwardness of after fight in the air. 

‘’I love you,’’ Quentin said, hugging his life partner from behind.   
‘’How could you not. ‘’

Their chuckle killed the last thread of anxiety Quentin felt in his heart. He learned to kiss Eliot who answered quickly before going back to cooking. 

‘’Can you get strawberries from the garden? It’s almost ready. ‘’

They finished the breakfast together and woke up Arielle bringing her a plate in bed. The delight in her face made her the prettiest girl in Fillory. And damn, Eliot’s crepe was fucking perfect.


	23. 22- Arielle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is ups and downs of dating magicians

If anyone had told Arielle that within two years she would meet a man from another time and another world, fall in love with him, marry him and now bearing his child while living in a house smaller than her kitchen, she would have laughed. She would have laughed harder if she was told that there would be a third person in that deal and she would be fond of him too. And yet there she was, tending to a garden, her belly starting to show her pregnancy, both men working on their puzzle. The strange thing in all of that was that she was beginning to enjoy this life. It was uncanny and full of concept that went way over her head, but as long as they answered her question when she asked, and they care for each other, she didn’t mind. 

The last fight between Eliot and Quentin had made things a bit weird in the house. From the snippet of stories she got over time, she understood that she used to be Quentin’s girlfriend, she died to save many people’s lives and came back from the death change and unstable. And of course, her husband was blaming himself for that. She also knew that Alice was like Fen or Margo; a subject you do not talk if you aren’t ready to handle a lot of repressed emotions and unsaid things that had lingered between both boys and were now exposed to the light. 

She knew they would be fine, but it was still weird, and the atmosphere in the tinny house was starting to make her suffocate. She couldn’t already do half her usual chore because Nakia had backed Eliot and Quentin’s paranoia and now she was on light duties until the baby was born. Adding their fight to the pot and she was starting to become irritable for no reason. So she decided to go to her sister for a day or two. The boys needed time together and alone, and to be honest, she needed a bit of space of her own. 

She’d written to her sister, brush off Quentin’s guilt over her leaving and walk toward her sister’s, where a field of plums was being taken care of, and a baby was slowly growing up. Plus it was time she announced her pregnancy. She was at the beginning of the fifth month, and her clothes were starting to feel too tight to pretend her body wasn’t changing visibly. At least, the morning sickness was gone.

That’s at her sister house that she discover the smell of cooked plums were making her nauseous. That was a new thing. Her sister was baking a pie when she arrived, and she had to excuse herself from the house a few minutes after her arrival otherwise she’d be sick. This got Delilah suspicious, and her big sister knew from then the good news. She went to open the windows inside to make the smell leave and let her play with her niece outside, near the fence separating the house from their father’s farm. 

Arielle discovers it was hard to worry about her father or her brothers when the six-month-old was cooing in her arm and trying to grip her braid with her chubby hand. She couldn’t stop the tears forming in her eyes thinking that soon she’ll have one of her own that would be a little bit of her and a little bit of Quentin. 

Fucking hormones

‘’Everything alright ‘Elle? ‘’ Delilah’s voice broke her spiraling thoughts.

The younger girl looked up from her niece who was lying on the ground, a toy in her hand, loving the happy noise she made when he heard her mother’s voice. 

‘’Yeah, just, getting overwhelmed. ‘’ She admits. ‘’ I hate being in light duty, my head starts to bring up worries that were not there before.’’  
‘’They were.’’ Delilah said, sitting next to her ‘’You just kept yourself busy enough to make them fade away. It’s a Lanclair trademark. ‘’

She took the baby in her arm, and it got clear she was hungry. Without any shame, she started to undo her blouse and get her breast ready. It’s not like Arielle hadn’t seen a nipple before. 

‘’I guess..’’ Arielle laughed slightly. ‘’Between Lunk getting drafted, the war being near our border, Elias and dad’s relationship getting worse, Nakia going to heal the soldier at the Northen barrier and the boys fighting at home, there’s nothing really to ease the mind. ‘’

There was a silence in which Arielle realized how much she had worried about all of this and never said it out loud. Eliot and Quentin were nervous enough about being fathers, she was scared to bring anything up. The last thing she wanted was to create a breakdown that would send them in a depressive episode. Maybe by doing that, she had been digging her own grave. That would explain why she was so irritable to them lately. 

‘’In all of the things you are saying, there is none that you can fix more than you did,’’Delilah said once she was sure her daughter was drinking properly. ‘’We are lucky the war than other farmers doesn't as much hurt us, but that is a game between royals and are only the collateral. Lunk and Nakia going to the front is nothing you can prevent.’’

Arielle wiped her eyes thinking of Eamon. How they had paid a high price already. Another thing she tried to bury inside her because it hurt too much to consider. 

‘’And you know Skye, and I convinced dad to send Elias to get mentored by Nakia before she leaves. He’ll be our healer while she’s away and living outside of the house might do him some good. For dad too. He will get over the fact that not all of his sons are really into farming. ‘’

The future mother nodded, looking down, playing with the thread of her worn out skirt. Maybe she should let Eliot find her new clothes. Hers were starting to get too small anyway. 

‘’And I won’t pretend I understand how your relationships between Quentin and Eliot work because I don’t. But if they survived so long in this tinny house of yours without killing each other, I can almost guarantee you that they will be alright. ‘’

Arielle started to cry in silence. Because she knew her family was accepting of her marriage, but many people had been confused at the wedding, and she purposefully didn’t write to certain relatives not wanting to hear their opinion on it. Polygamy was mostly known between nobles, not farmers. And it’s not like she could explain that they were King of Fillory in the future. Also, why would it matter? Their love should be enough for anyone. 

‘’Come, let’s put miss into her crib, I’ll see if I still have some of my maternity clothes or I gave them all away.’’ 

Arielle followed her sister, thanking the gods in a brief prayer that her sister didn’t comment on her tears. She wasn’t one to cry, but she had been a bit more lately. 

Fucking hormones. 

She came back to The Cottage when she felt better. Having new clothes lifted her mood and cuddling a baby reassured her that she would be able to do this when she has one of her own. She made her sister promise not to tell her family and left early enough that she would be home in time to help for dinner. 

She came back to the sight of both her men working on their puzzle. The absence of tension in their shoulder told her they had figured things out for now. Leaving them alone had been a good idea. She couldn’t help laughing when she saw Quentin look at her with a big smile and run toward her. The way he took her in his arm and kissed her made her feel like the luckiest girl in the world. Fillorian boys were not as demonstrative or passionate. 

‘’I missed you. ‘’ He said on her lips kissing her slowly before grabbing her bag and walking back to the house with her.   
‘’Missed you too.’’ She sigh, happy to feel the butterflies in her chest were still there.

Eliot hugged her and kissed her forehead without a word. With him, those were not as necessary as with Quentin. They had a kind of love that was beyond passion. It was respect and care. Both boys were acting a bit strange around her, talking without saying anything and asking how her week went. Usually, they welcomed her and went back to their work. Yes, she had been gone a bit longer than usual, but it’s not like she’d been far away. 

‘’Ember’s ass!’’ She exclaimed as she opened the door, ready to listen to their conversation while cooking something. 

But the house had changed. 

If the outside had been the same tiny space, she entered a living room that was twice its size. A fireplace was warming the place. Bookshelves took one wall completely, showcasing their growing book collection, as well as some objects that were on display; her mother’s portrait, Eliot and Quentin’s keys, the dry blooming flower Eliot brought back from their time at the festival, a picture of their wedding day. 

She walked in, unable to understand what was happening, and felt the warm and robust hand of her husband sliding from her shoulder to her side. He made her walk further into a small corridor that was leading to a small empty room with a big window, explaining it was the baby’s room and she could decorate it the way she wanted. She had to see the bathroom through her tears, their magical shower in place, as well as the bath, but also mirrors and storage for the towels. The kitchen wasn’t big, but large enough to, finally, have a counter where she could cook, Eliot magical sink was still there, and their stove was still old and rusty and yet didn’t felt out of place in the room this time. She adored the table set with four chairs that were in front of a large window that was giving a view of the puzzle, making her able to look at them even when she was doing chores. 

And finally, there was their room, their enchanted bed cover in a new dark red sheet with golden embroideries; voile was serving as curtain letting the light in yet providing a certain intimacy. There was now a closet to put her dresses and the boys more beautiful piece of clothes. A drawer was storing the rest. There were golden accents everywhere, making this room look like a bedroom you could have in Whitespire. 

‘’You said you were suffocating in the small house,’’ Quentin whispered in her ear before going in front of her and taking both her hands. He was trembling. Or was it her? ‘’We agreed, and we found this spe- ‘’

She kissed him fiercely.. She didn’t care what spell they did or how long it took them to do so. She will hear the story later. Now she needed to kiss her husband with all the love that was bursting out of her. They knew they couldn’t give her a bigger house, which they couldn’t move, and yet, they had listened and found a way to make her happy. This place felt like it was the work of Eliot and Quentin together, their magic and their style are interwoven into every new space she was discovering. 

Her man from another world found yet another way to blow her mind and turn her life upside down and for the better. 

Their clothes didn’t last long on their body and making love on silk sheets was a fantastic sensation. By the smell of it, Eliot was cooking something to eat while the two lovers were losing themselves in one another. They ate at the new table, both men beaming with pride from the success of a surprise that they had been working on for over a month now. 

 

The spell was a planar compression, and Quentin told her all night the story of a man who stole a time machine and flew into space. The stories of The Doctor and his Tardis became a bedtime ritual for Arielle the rest of her pregnancy.


	24. 23- Eliot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliot have a nightmare that might change everything

Having made a bigger house for Arielle had been Quentin’s idea, and Eliot had work hours to calculate the perfect way to do what they had in mind. Each room and corridor had its magical mathematics, but it had been something pleasant to work on when he was not working on the puzzle. He finished his calculation while Quentin’s wife was away for a week and it had been perfect timing for the surprise. Since then, everyone had been happier. To be honest, it was nice to live in a place where they wouldn’t walk on each other’s feet. Plus it was easier for everyone to have time alone if they needed to be.

Eliot should have known what living with a pregnant woman was like since he shared his bed with Fen while she was pregnant. But to be honest, he had been so self-centered and good at avoiding her that he barely knows how she felt through her pregnancy. It didn’t help that at her seventh month she got kidnapped to a fairy realm, far away from him. So except morning sickness, strange craving, backache and constant tiredness, he didn’t know what to expect of the situation.

What he didn’t expect was the fear Arielle had over decorating the baby’s room. The fight she had with Quentin had been one of their worse, and it had so many layers of hurt it would be a long and painful to resolve it. Meanwhile, Eliot had tried to run as fast as he could from the cottage, knowing from experience that taking a side was the best way to make things worst. This is how he ended up sleeping in Nakia’s home, her couch way too small for his tall legs.

The healer had been gone for two weeks now and Elias, the youngest Lanclair’s kid, was taking over her job. Most of her client knew the arrangement and that, if the problem was too big, fetching Barion’s healer might be best. Elias was surprisingly good with small injuries and poultice, but he was no surgeon yet.

‘’ It’s like baking‘’ Said the teen while Eliot explains he never really understood potion making.

Elias had learned through his cooking class that he and Quentin were magicians, his promise of silence and curiosity about magic reminded him of the first months Arielle and Quentin dated. Magic was so natural for Eliot now that he was starting to take it for granted. Again. Maybe knowing he would never go back home helped pretending magic would not leave Fillory yet. Perhaps he was merely an addict relapsing into his favorite drug and forgetting what the withdrawal had felt like. He didn’t care. Elias and Arielle reaction to his ability to do magic was the only thing he needed to feel better about using it carelessly.

‘’There’s a difference between a potion and a three-layer peach cake.’’Chuckle Eliot, making the said cake as the young boy was preparing some potion Mrs. Mahar needed for her bone aches.  
‘’Not really, you need to be precise with measuring the ingredient; otherwise something might go wrong. If you cook it too long or too little, it can fail the whole thing, and when you become good at it, you don’t need the recipe book.’’ Elias said, beaming with pride that he repeated all the notion Eliot had showed him in his cooking lesson. ‘’ Nakia even do her potions now. I’m not there, I need her books, but maybe one day.’’  
‘’You seem to enjoy this healer thing.’’  
‘’I do… well, I like taking care of the garden and selling potions and helping people. I don’t like the blood though. ‘’

Eliot made a mental note to talk about it with Arielle when he’d go home. The older men put his preparation the hot oven, looking at the time so he could calculate when it would be ready. From the flick of a hand, he cast a spell to clean his side of the table, letting the younger boy concentrate. There was a lot of his younger self he saw in Elias. And if he could help him get through his family relation and accept whoever he was, maybe his struggle would have been for something.

‘’Do you think they’ll be fine? ‘Elle and Quentin, I mean? ‘’ Elias asked after a moment of silence.

This question surprised grandly Eliot who looked at the young man puzzled.

‘’ I mean, I don’t want them to split up. ‘’

The idea that this fight, as terrible at, it was, could end the young couple relationship was so unimaginable that Eliot laughed a bit and put a calming hand on Elias’ shoulder.

‘’ Love isn’t always happiness and sex. ‘’ Eliot said, grinning when he saw the young boy getting red ear to ear. ‘’Sometimes you fight. For a good reason, for a stupid reason. But you do. And then you calm down. If something Arielle made me discover about relationships, is that after the fight, talking about it and finding a way to fix it is a good way to make your couple stronger. ‘’  
‘’What did you do before?’’  
‘’Pretend it never happen and drink mostly. ‘’

He had the same snort and laughed just like his sister who made Eliot laugh with him.

‘’Don’t worry, for real. ‘’ Eliot reassured, cutting the dried onion Elias would need for his poultice in step seven. ‘’I worked too much on those two to be together for it to fail. ‘’

Later that night, Eliot came back to The Cottage with a three layers peach cake and a monthly dose of Quentin’s poultice for his mood. He found the future parents eating dinner, holding hands, with a smile on their face. Arielle got excited about the cake and went to grab plates and forks while Eliot sat next to Quentin and kissed him quickly.

‘’You could have come back to sleep here yesterday. ‘’ Quentin whispered, grabbing Eliot's hand and squeezing it.  
‘’I know, but it felt that you two needed some alone time to get things of your chest and have emotions about it after. Plus I finally found Arielle secret cake recipe so be ready for me doing it all the time.’’

This is how you tell your partner there is nothing to forgive: you change the subject and make jokes. Honestly, he wasn’t sure what the whole fight was about, and he knew if the couple wanted to talk to him about it, they will. But right now, he wanted to be happy that they seemed to have figured things out.

‘’Didn’t you said you needed to stay away from it because you wouldn’t fit your jeans anymore?’’  
‘’Pff, with Arielle’s belly, I can gain a few pounds, and no one will notice how fat I got. She’s the one getting fatter. ‘’  
‘’I heard that!’’ Arielle chimed, coming back with the necessary to eat the desert. ‘’And I am eating for two, thank you very much. ‘’  
‘’You ate more than one slice before you got knocked up! ‘’

There was laughter; there was cake, there were kisses. The threesome that ensues had been quite satisfying as well.

Now lying naked in bed, Quentin got getting water, Eliot looked at Arielle was grabbing the cover that had fell on the floor and put it back on the bed, over him. She slides inside the bed, taking the middle place which usually was Quentin’s and grabs Eliot’s hand.

‘’I have to show you something.’’ She said, putting his hand on her belly. She seemed so excited there was no way she had not been waiting for a moment to do it.

The puzzled look Eliot gave her change into fear then pure wonder. His hand had just felt a tinny kicking movement inside the young woman body. Reality washed over him like a shower as he realizes that she was not only pregnant. She was creating another human. Someone who will grow up and have feelings and emotions. Quentin’s baby. His too.

‘’Fucking hell’’ He whispers with wonder, his eyes tearing up as hers were too.  
‘’That's a new one.’’ She laughed through her tears. ‘’Never heard that swear before.’’  
‘’Only keep it for a special occasion. ‘’

He smiles at her laughter, and she put his hand on the side of her stomach where he felt a small movement too. Eliot sat down to hug her properly, and both of them laughed when the baby decided to kick, and Eliot sensed it in his ribs.

‘’That’s what stops the fight’’ Quentin said, an hour later. He was back in bed, in the middle, Arielle fast asleep next to him. Both men were facing each other and whispered, trying not to wake her up. ‘’She didn’t want to do the baby’s room because she was scared of losing it again and didn’t want to get attached too quickly. Something like that.’’  
‘’I guess feeling it move is a good proof that the little one is alright.’’ Agreed Eliot, tucking one of Quentin’s lock behind his ear. His hair was now in the middle of his back and consistently in his face if it wasn’t tie in a ponytail.  
‘’Yeah, ‘’ He laughed. ‘’She was screaming at me then stop in a mid-sentence and rush to me to make me feel. At first, I was sure she was going to punch me. ‘’

Eliot laughed and kissed him slowly, both men sighing, happy to be back together. One night apart was too long. Even for them.

‘’Are you alright?’’ Eliot asked, making sure there was not a lingering panic attack.

But Quentin’s nod was too excited and his eyes too sparkling to pretend; he seemed more excited than scared. Which was a first when the topic was the baby. Eliot couldn’t help but smile and lean to kiss him slowly. He held his life partner in his arm until he fell asleep.

_Fen was in Whitespire, sitting on his throne, fire in her eyes. Fray was at Margo’s place, regal and distant as she always is. Both were wearing crowns. In front of them, a kneeling Margo. She was bloodied, malnourished and without strength. She was the shadow of the woman he knew. Her eyepatch had been removed, her hair was in a low bun, making sure everyone could see her disfigured face._

_‘’ I am sorry Margo, but I have no choice.’’ Said Fray in a cold and distant voice that wasn’t hers at all. ‘’You lied in front of everyone, while we were about to make peace with the fairies. You coming back with this fake letter from my father was the worst thing you could do to our kingdom. Your punishment was simply the proper way to answer your lies. ‘’_  
_‘’ I asked for the harm to be made to her.’’ Whispered Fen who visibly was the puppet of her fairy-raised daughter._

_Eliot noticed the shackles his wife had, forcing her to the throne. The High King crown she was wearing had now thorns, and she was bleeding from its weight on her head._

_‘’And I asked for a Kingdom where there was no threat. Visibly, Margo is still hoping Eliot comes back and save the day. He didn’t show up for your wedding with Ess, why would he suddenly show up now? In a letter? ‘’_  
_‘’You made me marry Ess so you could kill all of the Lorian court, you bitch.’’ Spat Margo, her voice broken and yet soaked in hatred._  
_‘’It work didn’t it? Fillory is now bigger than ever, and we don’t have to fight those bastards anymore. The Fairies have more land, and the few rebellious isles and tribes in the desert will soon beg for our mercy. ‘’_  
_‘’I swear it’s true. Eliot found the key. He’s in the past! Please Fen, stop listening to her and listen to me. He didn’t flee because things were hopeless, he's stuck in the past.’’_

_The was a long hesitation on Fen’s face. Torn between her duty to Fray and beliving Margo whom she never saw this low before. She would lie about a lot of things, but not about Eliot._

_‘’And we should believe you? A woman that sacrifice her child, me, so your Eliot could survive another day? You never cared for Fen, and you are still using your coward friend to threaten us of him bringing back magic? Ah! ‘’_

_The fake laughter Fray had was one of the most terrifying things Eliot ever heard, and he had talked with the Beast and fought through the veil of death itself. Margo started to cry when she saw Fen’s apologetic face. His wife believed Margo, but couldn’t do a thing about it._

_‘’ We don’t have any use for her anymore. I talked with my queen, and she agrees that since you got us rid of the Lorians, you had caused us more headache than help. Guard! ‘’_  
_‘’Fray, please.’’_

Fen tried to touch the arm of her, but her shackles restrained her. She was begging for Margo’s life while the woman was trashing and screaming, making a harder time for the guard to keep their grips on her.

‘’I only keep you alive, dear mother, because you gave birth to me. And in the fairy realm, it is not seen kindly to killed a mother. But if you keep protesting my decision and defending this traitor, I will make you have the same fate.’’

With the snap of a finger, Fen was unable to talk, forced to see Margo getting dragged by her tangled hair through the floor of the castle to the main door. Once they were open, we could see citizens of Fillory gathered around a wooden stage placed outside of the castle. From her position, Fen could still see everything happening, and people could see her not doing anything about it. No one seemed to understand she was a prisoner too.

Margo language was now the spiciest it ever was. Cursing everything and everyone around her, claiming that Eliot will find a way to come back as he said and he will destroy every fairy who had harmed the people he loves.

Margo only stops talking when her head was severed by a slicing spell that was as sharp as the best blade in the kingdom. Her head detached from her body. Citizen cheered, but it was not from happiness. It was my fear of being punished if they were not.

‘’Put her with the others,’’ Fray said to one of the guards, then turn to the fillorians. ‘’Let it be known, that anyone who is whispering about the lies of King Eliot coming back will suffer the same fate. He abandons you, so did King Quentin. Queen Margo has now joined her sister Queen Alice. ‘’

People turn their head to the row of spike where the head of Margo was empale next to Alice’s, and Josh’s, Kady’s Penny’s and Julia’s All the quester were now dead and a warning to any rebels.

‘’Now go back to your duties, the Fairy Realm can’t get back to its glory without your blood. ‘’

Eliot woke up screaming, sitting straight in the bed, shaking and crying. He had nightmares in his life. Dozens of them. Thousands. Never it had such a powerful impact on his mind once he was back into the real world. Oh God, was it a vision of what was happening?

‘’Eliot?’’

Quentin and Arielle were seated too, visibly awaken by his scream, worries in their eyes. The younger man put a hand on his shoulder and Eliot jumped into his arm, sobbing the terror of his dream. He felt his life partner’s hand going up and down his back, saying soothing things and kissing his head. He heard Arielle talk about water. Eliot had only time to push his body away of Quentin before vomiting his guts.

There was a blur of sound and image and time past fast and slow at the same time. He wasn’t sure how, but when he felt Quentin hand on his face, bringing him back to reality, he realized he was in the living room, on the couch, bare chest, a blanket on him, holding water. His boyfriend was keeping his face and trying to find him in his gazed eyes and something relaxed when he saw a light in the older man’s eyes.  
‘’Alright El’ tell me five things you can see.’’ Whispered Quentin, putting his hands away.  
‘’W...What?’’  
‘’Five things you see, anything.’’

Eliot's brain was shut down, and he wasn’t sure who he was and where he was. So he followed the instructions.

‘’A fireplace, the floor, a vase with flowers, a table, a book.’’ He enumerated, his eyes frantically looking everywhere and trying to remember the names of things he should know.  
‘’Great, Perfect. Four things you can hear. ‘’  
‘’Hm...’’ Eliot felt his heart racing and grabbed Quentin hands to have an anchor on this reality. ‘’Running water, your voice, the teapot boiling, the floor creaking.’’  
‘’You are doing great. ‘’ Praised Quentin calmly, ‘’now three things can physically feel on your body right now.’’  
‘’Uh… the bla...blanket, the glass of water, your hands in mine. ‘’  
‘’Great, now two things you can smell.’’  
‘’sweat and vomit.’’  
‘’We will fix that in a moment. I need one last thing. Tell me something you can taste right now.’’  
‘’My saliva? Does that make sense? ‘’  
‘’Perfectly. Now let’s take three deep breath.’’

He followed Quentin instruction and then followed him to the bath Arielle had made him. The water on his skin was soothing and brought him a step further into reality. He dunks his head under water to wash his hair while Quentin was telling his wife to go back to bed. When he emerged, Quentin started to wash his back with soap and a cloth.

‘’Thank you,’’ Eliot said when he felt he was back into his body. His mind was still giving him a horrible flash of his nightmare, but he was aware now that it hadn't been true. He hopes.  
‘’If there is something I am good at, is how to handle a panic attack. ‘’

If he weren’t so emotionally drained, Eliot would have laughed. Because it was true. He never thought that his boyfriend would have to use the technique for him though.

‘’I never had a dream so…. Vivid. It was like I saw it. It was like I was there. ‘’  
‘’Do you want to talk about it.? It’s alright if you don’t. I can bring you a writing book if you want. ,,

Quentin hand on his skin were soft and light. He usually had a more possessive and passionate touch. Now he felt like he was a wounded animal. Which was not far from the truth, to be honest.

‘’No..I… I think I’d like to tell you. ‘’  
‘’Alright, get out of the bath, put a robe and join me in the living room, I’ll finish the tea ‘Elle started earlier.’’

Eliot nodded and looked at Quentin getting up and about to leave the bathroom.

‘’Q…. Thank you. ‘’  
‘’I love you too’’ Quentin said, a worried smile on his lips. ‘’Take all the time you need to join me. We have all night. ‘’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Rae, Spooky and Alex on FTB for helping to find a end to this chapter. ._.


	25. 24- Quentin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliot and Quentin side quest

They hadn’t really planned on having a side quest in their main pursuit for the key, but the fact was that Eliot had not been the same since his nightmare. If his logical mind knew that it had been a dream and none of it was true, he had toed in too much psychic magic to know that dreams could carry truth sometimes. So after a week, he decided to find answers; there must be a way for them to see if it was a vision or not. 

The clock barren wasn’t created yet, so there was no way to look for the watcher woman, so they had two options left: going to see Ember and Umber or trying to find a questing beast. Two solutions that had their list of problems, but the main one was that Arielle couldn’t follow them. She said it wasn’t her place to follow them and wouldn’t know how to help, but Quentin hated the idea that he will have to leave her as she was nearly eight-month pregnant. 

The morning Eliot got himself ready to find his answer, Arielle had forced Quentin into some traveling clothes and almost kicked him out of the house with a bag full of clothes and food. It had confused the younger man, but he understood that his wife knew Eliot needed his presence more than she did. She reminded him that Elias had a bargain with some bunnies for quick messaging with Nakia and that, if anything would happen, she could use them.

Arielle had prepared Quentin’s bag had with enough clothing and food for both of them and weight almost nothing, thanks to the same enchantment Eliot had put on her peach basket. It gave Eliot the luxury to carry a bow and arrow they had trade long ago when they were thinking of hunting for meat. This idea was quickly abandoned since Eliot had too many terrible memories of his father forcing him into hunting getaway so he would ‘’become a man’’, and Quentin couldn’t bear the idea of skinning an animal. 

‘’Are you sure seeking the Gods is a good idea’’ Finally asked Quentin as they were leaving the cart that took them to the burning river; it was the closest place they could get drop off from Ember’s temple and saved them three walking days.   
‘’No. But it’s better than trying to find a questing beast. They are hard to find in time of peace, I can’t believe they aren’t busying themselves with the war right now. ‘’  
‘’You found The Great Cock in a day!’’ He reminded his boyfriend. ‘’It took Penny and me weeks to find The White Lady. ‘’

Eliot remained quiet for a moment, visibly pondering. Quentin let his memories trying to fight the blurriness of his time in the Flying Forest with Penny, but to be honest, they had been so high there was not much he remembered. He mostly remembers the wall of chagrin that washed over him when he got out. And how Penny had managed to pull him out of it before he decided to join Alice in death. Those memories were so far away; they felt like it was another lifetime. Maybe, in a sense, it was. There was the Quentin before the puzzle and after it. 

‘’I think The Great Cock wanted to be found.’’ Eliot finally said, putting Quentin out of his spiraling mind. ‘’You are right it was way too easy. But he knew about the fairies and was so ready to give me the quest; it was like he had written it before I even arrived. Maybe he knew I would get him and wanted us to bring back magic. Or at least, have magic, so we fight the fairies.’’  
‘’You know what, you might not be wrong there. It took Jane a whole year to find The Great Cock in the Wandering Dune, and she had needed trickery to get him.... why are you smiling that way?’’ 

Eliot laughed as Quentin frown; half puzzled half annoyed. He knew he got all excited as he started to talk about Fillory and Further. Despite his growing love-hate relationship with the books, he couldn’t help the fact that part of him loved them. Even after living in actual Fillory for four years, there was still something about those books. The stories. The memory they carried. 

‘’I missed fanboy Quentin.’’ Teased Eliot  
‘’ Said the man who complains when I tell Arielle Doctor Who stories.’’  
‘’That’s because you are doing the classic Who, it’s boring. Bring ten now. He’s sexy and witty. I loved him. ‘’ 

The fact that they banter about which doctor was the best while doing a quest in Fillory made Quentin fall in love a bit more with Eliot. 

They ended up having to camp outside on the first night. They were nowhere near a city, and the two moons were high in the sky when they stopped. They took the pillows, and blanket Arielle had stuffed into Quentin’s infinite bag and lay on the ground, making this moment to be in each other’s arm without having someone else to consider. Maybe it was because at home they have been used to sleep on a mattress even if they were outside, or it’s merely Eliot being Eliot, but it took him less than ten minutes to complain about the cold ground and his back hurting. It was almost ridiculously easy to distract him with a suggestion of back massage that was, in fact, an unspoken way to have sex together in the middle of nowhere. 

On the second day of the walk, the boys were walking in a forest that was leading toward Ember’s temple, later rename Ember’s tombs. Quentin couldn’t help to smile at the many flowers blooming in impossible places, vines and roots growing everywhere, animal making noise from every corner of the forest; they were going in the right direction. Ember was the god of chaos after all.

‘’I’m starting to understand what you mean when you said The Beast killed what Fillory use to be,’’ Eliot said, a bit of wonder in his voice.   
‘’I feel Plover didn’t do it justice. It’s even better than what he wrote in the books.’’ Quentin smiled, feeling Eliot squeezing his hand. ‘’That’s how I always imagined it when I read it you know. They Fillory we discover was... well...’’  
‘’On the near edge of collapsing and dying from an early death? ‘’  
‘’Good thing that had a good High King and High Queen that cared enough to bring it back on its feet.’’

Eliot chuckled at the compliment, but his smile was sad. He didn’t say it out loud, but Quentin started to doubt that his dream made him miss Margo to a point he never allowed himself to go. That what he saw was true or not, at the end of the day, they couldn’t do anything to help Margo or their friend. The only thing they could do, they were doing it every single day. That stupid puzzle was almost imprinted into their brain. But they continued. Yes with Arielle thing had slowed down and most likely with the baby, it will do it even more. But they promised each other that they would continue despite everything. They had to stay. Otherwise what was all those years of failure for?

They arrived at the temple, which was ornate with flowers, butterflies and a cake smelling scent that was mouth watering. Questing was great, but eating during it was shit. Quentin had images of him and Julia walking into this exact place, requesting for help. They got it, and Julia had gotten her memories of Reynard as a bonus. Why did it always felt that even when they get what they wanted, the gods would make them pay the price. Alice becoming a niffin had been a direct consequence of her drinking their power. Julia’s magic must be because of them too, but that was a theory he had not been ready to tell her and now would never do.   
‘’By the undertone of wet fur I smell, he must be there,’’ Eliot said, grimacing. Quentin hadn’t noticed it before, but now that it was pointed out, it was the only thing he could smell. ‘’It’s going to be fine Q, don’t worry about it.’’  
‘’What’s that line they said in Once Upon A Time? ‘’ Quentin said, fixing the strap of his bag even though they were perfectly placed. ‘’Magic comes with a price?’’  
‘’Oh don’t be so dramatic.’’   
‘’I am just saying, let’s be careful. They fucked us over many time since we met them. ‘’  
‘’and not even in the fun way.’’

Quentin suddenly wondered if Eliot had slept with other creatures that a human during his trip to Ibiza and other free time, but then decided this was not worth asking or having a panic attack for. He merely rolled his eyes and followed him, having a terrible feeling about what was to happen.

‘’Well spank my cheek and call me a butterfly, ‘’ chimed Ember’s as he saw them enter ‘’you two decided to leave the puzzle.’’ 

The cave had nothing to do with the first time they got here; there was luxurious drape and golden trinkets everywhere, a magical fall was making a pond for bathing, there were food and drink for ages, even the light that came from the different openings and cracks seemed to put a relaxing tone. 

The god was seated on a roman-like chair where he was lying on one side and was looking into a mist that must be the see-through mist where they could see somewhere else. Quentin had learned the see-through mirror in one of the last class he ever had in Brakebills. Apparently, fog was ten times harder since it was made on an incorporeal matter, but if someone could do that, it was a god. 

After half a second of hesitation, both men bowed. 

‘’We didn’t quit doing it, we merely came here to have an audience with you. ‘’ Eliot said, using his High King voice. 

Distant, polite, confident. And hot? For the love of God focus Quentin, focus! When he came back to the present and focused on the conversation, visibly Eliot had explained the reason for their visit. Ember was thinking, probably taking his time just because he could, and plopped a pastry in his mouth. 

‘’Dream reading. How fun, I didn’t have this request for ages. It’s more my brother’s thing, but he’s off in Loria, trying to prove me they will win the war. Humph! Anyhow, why should I help you? A lot is going on right now, and you two are insignificant in the grand view of things. I get that you are stuck and worried, but that turmoil you feel little human, is what I live for. Did you think coming to the god of chaos would solve your problem.’’

Eliot clenched his fist, Quentin felt anger rise in both of them. He put a hand on his partner, knowing that he would never allow anyone to talk to him that way, even a god. Swallowing his emotion, he looks at Ember who was please with their reaction. For the first time in his life, Quentin was happy he killed him. 

‘’I know who wins the war. I can tell you. ‘’ Quentin finally said, making the other occupant in the cave look at him with surprise.   
‘’What’s the fun of knowing, I rather see it unfold. ‘’ Said Ember, trying to hide his visible interest. 

Gotcha. 

‘’Aren’t you the god of chaos? Even if I told you what I know in my reality, you could change it in the flick of a hand. Create a new set of event that I wouldn’t even know, despite coming from the future. ‘’ Quentin said, trying to gather his thought, discovering them as he was speaking out loud.   
‘’Interesting, go on.’’  
‘’I tell you who wins, not how. You help Eliot. We both can have what you want, and you can mess with Umber even more. He wants to play by the rules, that’s his problem.’’

Ember got up on his hooves, Quentin tried not to follow his instinct and walk back a bit. He needed to be strong. For Eliot. For his partner who had given him so much when he needed it. Now Quentin knew he could give it back, and it felt like the best thing in the world. To be needed. To be able to help. To be a hero, in a sense.

‘’I like you, Quentin.’’ The god finally said after looking at him up and down. ‘’ Alright. Deal. Come, let see the battle and talk while it unfolds.’’

Before both boys could even answer, Ember had transported the three of them on the edge of a mountain, two armies marching against one another. They were less than a thousand on the Fillorian side, but Loria didn’t seem to hold as much creature that could wield magic. Numbers against magic, this was the kind of odds nobody could know the answer of who would win. 

‘’Where are we?’’ Quentin asks, puzzling the little he knew about the battle.

Plover was not the best with Fillorian lore, and it is only through online forums and many biographies and articles with the author that they could piece things together. Maybe, some of the forum articles had been written by past magicians that had visited Fillory before, now that he thought about it. 

‘’A few miles from the Broken Bay. Loria’s ship had been ready a bit too much faster for my taste. But Umber did want to win our bet and made a deal too. So much for lawfulness!’’

Eliot looked at Quentin, silently asking him what to do. Which was new because usually, it was Eliot who took a leadership role, in Brakebills, in Whitespire, even in their house. Something warm bubbled inside of him. 

‘’So you were about to say who was about to win.’’ The god chipped excitedly, making three throne-like chairs appear.

They all seated, the battle had started. The was now red painting over any color of allegiance displayed.

‘’Not before you take care of Eliot.’’ Quentin countered, making sure he was not looking at the battle.

Ember sigh dramatically leaned over Eliot and touched his temple. The tall man froze for a few seconds, his eyes glazing over. When the god was done, he held a sphere displaying the dream that was haunting him. Quentin closed his eyes when Margo lost her head. Hearing it had been awful, but seeing it was even worse. If they were not on each side of Ember, Quentin would have held Eliot's hand. The poor man was as pale as a ghost. 

The bloodthirsty glee that was flashing in the god eyes was slightly terrifying. 

The orb was now glowing many, and Quentin felt it was time to distract Ember so Eliot could get his passive and confident mask back; the tear he saw forming in his eyes was heart-wrenching. 

‘’What no?’’ He said a bit, trying to put all his anxiety and fear into it, which visibly worked; the god turned his gaze toward him,  
‘’tsk tsk’’ he chimed ‘’patient little mortal, some spell takes times. Now while we wait, let’s see what is unfolding down below while you tell me everything.’’

Quentin did. Not looking at the battle down the hill, he told Ember about Yana’s death. How her sacrifice inspired the troops, and the people won the war, not the noble. If this were the battle he thought it was, the war would end within a few months, a year max. Many civilian will die. In her will, Yana asked to build shelters for the homeless, orphanages for those who lost their parent on both sides of the war and many schools got rebuilt. Those efforts were more focus into big town than the countryside, but this will make Fillory stronger and able to continue surviving until the next kings and queens arrive, decades later. 

‘’And who are those future monarchs?’’

Quentin bit his lips, unsure if he should answer the question. After all, the next in line for the throne was the Chatwin, and that was another whirlpool of problem and death. 

‘’We promised our knowledge about Yana, nothing after.’’ Said Eliot, his voice calm yet firm. He’d probably sense Quentin’s hesitation and came to the rescue. Another moment where his year as a king proves to be formative.   
‘’Humph. Fine.’’ Said the god, visibly annoyed. ‘’And when will High Queen Yana die? Seeing her soldier getting beaten is starting to be boring.’’  
‘’Those are actual human with lives you are talking about.’’ Objected Quentin, getting suddenly vexed. He wasn’t sure why. ‘’Maybe it’s easy to watch a war when you don’t participate in it, but all the death, on both side, they will matter. At least for someone. For the families and friends that won’t have them come back from the field. ‘’

Ah. There was the reason why. He was getting upset because part of him couldn’t help thinking of Eamon’s death. How Arielle had been devastated. The way her body shook when she cried. How they got married so quickly because she was afraid of losing him too. The war impacted people beyond the battlefield. 

‘’You sound like Umber.’’ snapped the god. 

Quentin and Eliot froze, unsure if they went too far, glancing at each other. Suddenly the sphere that had been floating near them the whole time became a bright purple. 

‘’ohhhh what do we have here. ‘’ Said Ember excitedly. 

It is hard to deal with someone who’s mood goes from one extreme to the other.

‘’hm... I see. ‘’ the god said, frowning. The light of the glob was fogging any image that could help them understand. ‘’As Magicians, you must be aware of the concept of alternate reality right?’’ 

Eliot and Quentin looked at each other, half confused, half amused. 

‘’we are.’’ Eliot said. ‘’one decision can change everything- ‘’  
‘’blah blah blah yes. So. From what I see, this is a possibility that had been explored and reset by The Watcher Woman.’’

It took all of Quentin’s will not to blurt out Jane’s name. Visibly, the god didn’t know it. Eliot looked at him with thousands of questions he could only assume the answer, but that was a discussion for later. 

‘’This time traveler is becoming a problem, beware of her little mortal, time is not to mess with.’’ With the twist of a hand, the sphere disappeared into the air. ‘’How silly of me, you know already, you are stuck here after all.’’

The echo of the god’s laughter stayed in Quentin’s brain hours after leaving his side. There had been something sinister and ominous in it that chilled him to the bone. What did he know that both of them didn’t?   
‘’Got the key of the room. Won’t be ready for another hour though.’’ Eliot said, coming back from the inn he’d enter a few minutes ago. 

At least, when Ember decided he was tired of them and sent them away, he had picked a place that was not far from home. Barion was only one day of walk from The Cottage or a few hours of cart. But the sun was setting down, and both men had barely slept in two days, they were hungry and emotionally exhausted. Resting at the inn was a better and faster option for both of them. 

Nevertheless, they had a lot to talk before going home. That’s how they got seated in the corner of an overpack restaurant, seated side by side, legs intertwined. Usually, Quentin hated people that were like that in bars or public spaces, but the customer didn’t even glance twice at them. Too busy singing with the bard and laughing. 

Quentin took Eliot hand and lean for a kiss. He tries to put all the care and concern he had in those few seconds, but his partner was still visibly shaken. 

‘’It didn’t happen El’ let's try to remember that,’’ Quentin said, his hand on his partner’s neck. He started to play with his hair, which was a sweet and calming spot for him. Within seconds his eyes were closed , and he sighed.  
‘’It did happen, it just didn’t stick.’’  
‘’Like the 39 other times, we died. And yet here we are, alive and well. ‘’

Eliot chuckled and laughed, pulling Quentin over him, so he was seated on his lap. 

‘’Alive and well.’’ agreed Eliot, before kissing him more genuinely. This time, the rush of passion and Quentin felt all the unspoken love they shared before getting stuck in Fillory.

Both men’s heart was beating fast and loud as the kiss deepened. Yet another proof of them still existing against the odds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! Life has been crazy with vacation, writing the DND book and SDCC coverage, but there you are.


	26. 25- Arielle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the pregnancy is near the end, the idea of adding a fourth member to the family bring Arielle a lot of unspoken fear.

Arielle woke up feeling something move into the bed. Which wasn’t supposed to happen since Eliot and Quentin were gone. When she sleepily opened her eyes, her mind still in the dream fog, she saw her husband looking at her, a smile on his face.

‘’Did I woke you up?’’ he whispered, putting her hair behind her eyes.  
‘’What time is it?’’  
‘’Dawn just arrived, we took the first cart here.’’

His voice was warm, his hand around her felt so right, she couldn’t help to lean and kiss him before putting her head back on the pillow.

‘’I missed you.’’ She whispered, unsure if Eliot was next to them sleeping.  
‘’I missed you too. Sorry I had to leave. ‘’  
‘’Is Eliot alright?’’  
‘’Yes, it was nothing but a terrible nightmare.’’  
‘’Oh bless the gods. I was sure there- ‘’

She didn’t finish her sentence. Her head in her husband’s neck his arm around her, his hand stroking her belly; this had been the perfect way for her to fall back asleep.

Arielle was fat. At least that’s how she felt. She couldn’t see her feet anymore; her feet were swollen and getting up from the couch was a Herculean task now. The baby was now due in a few weeks, and she couldn’t wait for it to arrive; she couldn’t even sleep the way she wanted anymore, the baby’s position dictating it. She tried not to move as much when the boys were in bed, but she knew she was waking them up.; Plus she needed to pee every five minutes.

After her long fight with Quentin a few months ago, she had agreed to get a few necessary things for the baby, but she was still unable to get more than a few days worth of clothes and washable diapers. Quentin had built the crib with Eliot one night, but she refused to more decoration until the baby was alive and screaming in her arm. She wouldn’t bear to hope and have a stillborn baby. Whatever her boys were saying, they didn’t know. Maybe on Earth it was a rare event like they said. In Fillory, it wasn’t.

The soon-to-be mother was fixing a hole in one of the baby jumpers her sister had given her, humming a song from Earth she had made Eliot sing over and over. If this man weren’t a magician on a quest, she would have encouraged him to become a bard or something. The constant noise of the tile on the floor and the boys doing their daily puzzle, the song, her hand doing something; she needed to keep busy otherwise she’d start to realize that she would be a mother and the same fear that had gotten her when she had been alone the week before.

When the sun was high enough, she put down her sewing -now working on a new pair of pants for Eliot- and waddled in the kitchen. She felt the baby move for the first time of the day. It calmed her a little, knowing it was still there. She came back outside with sandwiches and water; the boys stop doing the puzzle.

‘’Were you signing Hamilton earlier?’’ Quentin asked as he sat next to her.  
‘’Blame Eliot, he’s the one that introduces me to the song,’’ she said, blushing a little.  
‘’Dear Theodosia is one of my favorite song of the show’’ Reassure Eliot, laughing and stealing the sandwich Quentin was holding. ‘’I’m happy you remember the lyrics now.’’  
‘’One day I’d like to know all the song of the show.’’

The way Eliot was beaming made Arielle happy. Since they came back from finding answers, Eliot had been better, but she couldn’t help notice the light in his eyes was not as bright anymore. And she was dreading what it would be when the baby would be there, using all of her and Quentin’s time.

She decided to use the fact that the boys were working to take a nap and find a comfortable position. She slept until dinner time and swore for a few moments before getting up and helping Eliot to make the meal, not listening when he said he didn’t need help.

When it was time to sleep, she was wide awake and reassured her boys that she would read a bit longer before finding them, wondering if she would even be sleepy. That nap had helped a lot. A bit too much even.

The moment they were in the room, she went into the bathroom, made herself a bath and tried to read. Her mind wandering, unable to remember the word she just read. She abandoned quickly and merely enjoy the warmth of the water, rubbing her gigantic belly.

When she saw Eliot and Quentin tangled in each other like in the beginning, she couldn’t bear waking them up or even forcing them away from the position. She slept on the couch. Quentin had scolded her the morning after. Nothing a few kisses could fix.

News was slow to come by at The Cottage. Gossip went fast, but anything happening outside of the farmer’s life and Barion could take a while for them to know. It was over dinner at her father’s that she learned the death of High Queen Yana who died the day before the boys came back to The Cottage. Quentin and Eliot paled at the news, and she wondered if they had something to do with it. She also wondered if asking would lead to another of those it’s hard to explain it’s from future events that didn’t happen yet kind of conversation.

When they walked home that night, she dared to ask. Quentin was surprisingly open about it, telling her he knew about the High Queen’s death during the war and only had risk saying a future event so crucial so Eliot could have the answer he needed. Her death was just too close to this revelation to be a coincidence.

It had never occurred to her that Quentin and Eliot knew events that would affect Fillory forever and yet hadn’t happened before. They had told her about the danger of talking about the future. Butterfly effect and everything. She fell silent for a moment, wishing she could drink so she could shut up the voice telling her he might have known about Eamon’s death.

 _Don’t be ridiculous. He wasn’t important enough. He was a pawn. And so are you_.

She pretended to fall asleep quickly to avoid questions, but the moment she felt Quentin’s breath steady and becoming slower, she slipped away from the bedroom. She found in the rocking chair in the baby’s room, lost in a prayer to the gods. She did everything she had to do; she found a good guy, she married him, they were having a baby, they had a beautiful magical house, her garden was blooming like it never did before, and yet she was shaken to the core. She should be happy right now and yet; the past few days had filled her with nothing but anxiety and sadness.

‘’Hey ‘Elle.’’ whispered the voice of Eliot in the dark of the room. She could see his shape leaning on the fame door. ‘’What’s wrong? ‘’

He didn’t as if something was wrong. He knew something was. She blinked a few times, drying the tears that were forming into her eyes.

‘’I am... how do you call that, Quentining out? ‘’ she said, smiling a bit at the chuckle he made. Eliot walked toward her the window producing enough light from the moon so she could see him without reading his face thoroughly. Maybe it was cowardly of her, but not being able to look him into the eyes felt easier right now.

‘’Is it the baby?’’  
‘’Yes, and no. It’s a lot of things. And I know most of my worries aren’t even worth mentioning, so I need time to think. ‘’  
‘’It’s not because they are small or distorted that those worries aren’t valid.’’

Touché. She stops rocking herself and sighs, knowing this was an invitation to talk freely while Quentin was sleeping.

‘’Do you want tea?’’ She finally asked.

A few minutes later, Eliot was making tea, and she was eating one of the peach pastry her father had given them. Plums were still rocky on her stomach since the first few months of her pregnancy. She wrapped her hand around the mug, looking at the bedroom door to be sure Quentin wasn’t awake and then look back at Eliot.

‘’Honestly El, you haven’t acted out of jealousy since I arrive in your life and I don’t understand. ‘’ Arielle said after a moment, trying to point out the source of her anxiety. Most of it was how she and the baby would break something so perfect as Eliot and Quentin’s love for each other. ‘’Even I sometimes get a little envious of your relationship with Q? ‘’  
‘’What do you mean?’’ he asked seating in front of her at the table.  
‘’You two will have something I’ll never have. ‘’ She finally admits to herself and out loud. She felt a stone drop into her heart and yet, it felt so freeing to realize it. ‘’I am not saying this in a bad way, it’s just. You had life and memories before this, adventure and quest. Even when I met you, I knew you two had something.’’

Gods, she even joked with her ex-boyfriend about how cute they were as a couple.

‘’All I am saying is that you two lived a life before me, before Fillory.’’ She continued seeing Eliot frown while he drank his tea. ‘’Meanwhile, you are all that I have. And sometimes it scares me that he’ll get tired of me, that I was only a shiny toy to get distracted with for a while. ‘’

The dark-haired man’s eye widens as he took her hand. It was so sudden of a gesture it surprised her a bit.

‘’ oh gosh ‘Elle, no! Do you really think that? ‘’ he asked, horrified  
‘’Sometimes I do.’’ She admitted, her face blushing with guilt. ‘’And... I mean you were the one encouraging him to marry me, he even told me you told him to find a girl to have a family if it’s what he wanted. I just... ‘’

She looked at the bedroom door then to Eliot, trying not to cry, knowing that she was saying out loud things she was even too scared to admit herself.

‘’Am I that girl because I was the only one available at that point?’’

Eliot got up and sat next to Arielle, wrapping his arm around her body, pulling her in a comforting hug. His lips went to her temple, and this small gesture meant the world for her. She’d seen him doing to Quentin over and over.

‘’ He’ll never tell you that, but had his eyes on your way before you were single ‘Elle. ‘’ he said. ‘’I know polyamory is more a high-class type of relationship than one for farmers, but even before Fillory I... Fuck. ‘’

She felt the hug tighten, feeling his emotion taking over as well. It felt nice to be vulnerable and true toward her fear of losing Quentin and having his partner coming to reassure her. It was messy and shouldn’t have happened during the night, but at least, it happened.

‘’Q is right when he says sometimes he feels like we share him. ‘’ Eliot continued. ‘’Because you feel that way too don’t you? ‘’

She nodded. Yes, time with Eliot was nice, but it rarely felt like the three of them and mostly her and Quentin and him and Quentin. Eliot and her had always made sure the other had enough time alone and trying to respect boundaries inside and outside the bed. But Arielle realized they were doing it for Quentin, not for them. Maybe that's why having a fourth member to the family scared her so much. She didn’t feel like a family already with the three of them.

Gods she wishes she could drink right now.  
‘’alright. ‘’ Eliot said, pushing her slightly so he could look her into the eyes, his hand on her shoulder.’’ Then let’s fix that. Because I don’t want you to feel like the baby or you aren’t now part of our life. Yes, we might have a past that you don’t share, but what he feels isn’t less genuine. ‘’

She tried a small smile that he reciprocate.

‘’I only nudge him toward you, but he did the leap to ask you on a date. Even if he blurted it out the moment, he knew you were single he's the one that did it. If this isn’t a proof that he was hoping for an opening, I don't know what is. ‘’ Eliot said, joining her giggle. ‘’and god... he’s just so much better since you came in our life. I am too if I am honest.’’

Something happened at this moment. Arielle couldn’t say what, but she felt, for the first time, her and Eliot were partners. Outside of Quentin. Not lovers, but partners. She leaned and kissed him. On the lips. Nothing passionate. Just a small quick kiss. That was something they never shared outside of the bed. He smiled at her, and she hugged him

‘’I’m sorry ‘el, I just love him so much. And I love you too, you know. ‘’  
‘’I love you too, cupcake.’’

Quentin didn’t even wake up with both of them joined him into the bed. Their arm around the boy they love, holding eachother's hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gotta thanks the plane ride I had to do! AHah! It made me write this chapter so much faster than any chapter i published before. Anyway, the next one is a big one, but I felt Eliot and Arielle needed to fix something before it happens.  
> Thanks for any comment and kudos you make, my insecure heart adores you.


	27. 26- Eliot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of course, it had to be a thunderstorm when they needed the midwife

Eliot was placing the red tile Quentin was telling him to, his mind numb as it was usual when the work on the puzzle. It had become second nature to work the same tile with his partner that he didn’t need to think more than one tile at a time. He was always the kind of person who hated boredom and couldn’t bear the idea of a quiet life, and yet, here he was. And he was the happiest he’d been in years. 

‘’Quentin, can you come here two seconds?’’ chimed Arielle’s voice from the house. 

The way Quentin bolted through the door was almost comical. Knowing that the baby was due anytime now, the smallest movement his wife did made him jump, ready in action. It didn’t seem anything worrisome since the long-haired man didn’t come back in panic. Eliot took the plan they were working on and was trying to find where he was in the pattern when he felt the rain falling unto his skin and the parchment. Soon the few droplets smudge the chalk drawing, rendering it almost unreadable. Cursing, Eliot looked up and saw the dark and ominous cloud coming their way; a much-needed storm was coming. The garden would be happy. 

Knowing it was worthless to work under the rain without Quentin, he grabbed the parchment paper they used to compare different patterns earlier, took up the bowls emptied out of the dessert Arielle had served them a while ago, and walk inside. By the time he cleaned the dishes, stack the old drawing and got a new paper to redrawn the unusable one, the light in the sky had disappeared and it was pouring rain outside. The low growl of thunder was echoing in the distance. Entirely a calming sound was coming from the windows. 

‘’Ah- good I was scared you got caught by the rain,’’ Quentin said, coming out of the bathroom.   
‘’Got in just in time.’’Eliot reassured. ‘’is everything alright? ‘’ 

He pointed with his chin toward the bathroom, indicating Arielle, Quentin sigh and put his hand in his hair, visibly nervous and frustrated. 

‘’Her back hurts, and she has contraction but not enough to say it’s time to summon a midwife. ‘’   
‘’With our luck, the baby will arrive during the storm’’ Eliot laughed. Quentin joined.

It is precisely what happens. 

A few hours after the conversation, Arielle’s contraction had not, and the only thing she was able to do was to lie down on the couch, a cushion in the curve of her back. Quentin was playing in her hair, trying to distract her with the tale of how the eight doctor was to become the ninth. Finally, part of the show he saw and could help with the storytelling later. There was no way Quentin would do justice to the sass of nine. 

Eliot had finished his drawing and had decided to see if a bunny was hiding in the hut they had built for them. An idea Quentin had at first so they always could have one around the house if they needed to communicate, without forcing a free bunny to become their pet. Two large rabbits were nibbling at one of the carrots they left there as a treat. 

‘’I know the temperature is awful, but could one of you do me a favor?’’ he said to the animals. The white and black one nearest of him looked at him with curiosity. 

Thunder and lightning were painting the sky, and the rain was so intense they barely could see outside. Arielle was now in her second bath of the day. Quentin came to see Eliot who just sent a word to the midwife. By the time she gets the message and would be able to go here, Arielle would be in labor. 

‘’ Thanks,’’ Quentin said when he told him about the messenger bunny being sent. 

Eliot wrapped his arm around his partner, kissing his head and pulling him in a hug. He could feel the younger man shiver. 

‘’You’re going to be a dad.’’ Eliot realized, laughing and kissing his head again.   
‘’We are.’’ Quentin corrected. 

Eliot smile tenderly, grabbing his partner chin and pulling him into a reassuring kiss. He was right. They will. Holy fucking shit. 

Arielle was back on the couch, surrounded by cushions, trying to eat something with the boys. Her contractions were becoming more painful and more often, and each time she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Every time Eliot had to remind himself to breathe. 

‘’I know you wanted to wait before we choose a name.’’ He decided to say to distract the pregnant woman. ‘’But we should talk about it now. The baby is about to come, and we all need a distraction. ‘’ 

Arielle nodded, Quentin took her hand and kissed it. It was rare to see her with her hair undone, even sick; she was doing braids and other things, so her long hair wasn’t in her way. It seemed to be the less of her priority right now. 

‘’Is there a tradition on earth? For names? ‘’She asks looking at her husband then at Eliot.   
‘’Depends on the family and your religion. ‘’ Quentin said, shrugging. ‘’There was none in my family.’’ 

They both looked at Eliot who rolls his eyes. 

‘’Mine had that weird one where everyone had the same first letter for a name: Eliot, Emmet, Eric. Ugh. But if we can avoid any connection between them, I’d be more than happy. ‘’ 

Despite her pain, there was a tenderness in Arielle’s smile that put a balm on Eliot’s heart. He hated to talk about his family. Not in a Fen or Margo kind of way. More in a ''they are dead to me'' kind of way

‘’Usually, we give the name of a grandfather as the middle name for a boy. And a grandmother if its a girl.’’ Arielle said, rubbing her belly. ‘’I know you were close to your dad Q, what was his name? I forgot. ‘’   
‘’Ted. ‘’

There was a pang of sadness in his voice that felt more like he remembered someone who had died than the usual anxiety of remembering someone from Earth. Maybe he was finally accepting their fate to be stuck in this world forever. Perhaps he was only too much worried about the baby to agonize over something else. 

‘’Ted it is. ‘’  
‘’Do you want us to use your mother’s name? ‘’ Quentin asked, but Arielle shook her head. She looks at Eliot who raised an eyebrow.   
‘’ I just told you ‘Elle I don’t want anything to do with my family, ‘’ he said, but Arielle chuckled and shook her head.   
‘’I think the name meant to remind us of people we love and cherish in our life. I was thinking, if it’s a girl, we could use the name of the girl that meant everything to you ‘ El. Her middle name could be Margo. ‘’

It was like she stroke an arrow in his heart. Feeling his eyes tearing up, conflicting emotions bubbling in his chest, he looked at the woman who was lying on the couch, wondering if she knew how much this simple idea meant the world to him. It wasn’t only the idea of including him in the family; it was acknowledging that Margo might be gone, but will always be part of Eliot anyway. She built the man he was now. 

‘’I’d really love that. ‘’ He choked up. 

Quentin took his hand. The conversation stopped because Arielle started to swear as a rush of pain got into her, this time, liquid staining her loose fitting dress; she’d just broke her water. 

Everything went fast in Eliot’s head; he saw the fear in the soon-to-be mother’s eyes, Quentin was audibly panicking and at this moment, he knew what he had to do; he’d try to deliver the baby if the midwife wasn’t in time. Which, with this temperature, didn’t seem to be an option. 

For the first and only time in his life, he was thankful to have lived on a farm and assisted many cows and sheep at birth. It had been a traumatizing experience each time, but now he almost knew what he had to do. Almost. 

‘’ Q get sheets in the bathroom and then boil some water in the biggest pot we have, ‘Elle, we’ll lie you down in the bed alright? ‘’ 

Quentin bolted out of the room, visibly happy to have someone telling him what to do. Arielle gasped from obvious pain and got up with his help. Eliot had to carry most of her weight, as she was dragging herself to their bedroom, the pain visible in her face. He saw her holding tears, and the moment he put her on the bed, he dried them up. 

‘’Cry and scream as much as you need alright. ‘’ He said, and she laughed through a sob. 

Quentin helped him put sheets under her and where most of the fluid would come out. The married couple kissed quickly before the man ran into the kitchen to boil water. Eliot was pulling her soak and bloodied underwear. For once there was nothing sexual in this gesture. It was almost a bit gross. 

Arielle had another contraction, Eliot looked at the clock. Her second one was four minute later. He didn’t know the real amount of time that was required for people to go to the hospital, but it was out of option anyway. When the third contraction hit the four-minute mark, it gave him the confirmation that the baby was working. That’s all he knew about the time between contraction things. 

After confirming she was not open enough, he sat next to her and held her hand, helping her to breathe. It was one of Quentin’s anxiety calming technique, but he’d seen people do that in movies. That was a part he didn’t have to deal at the farm, so he was improvising. Hopefully, Arielle nor Quentin would notice. He knew that when the labor would happen, he would have to be the pillar of the relationship, he didn’t expect himself to be so ready to take a lead role like this. 

Arielle roared. 

Quentin came back with a basinet of hot water, took Eliot’s place at holding her hand and doing a breathing exercise. Eliot left a moment saying he needed to wash his hand, but also he dunks his head into the cold water to stop the pure panic that raised in his chest.

He cleaned his hand thoroughly, brought clothes and, with the warm water, washed some of the mess that had stuck to her leg. She had started to use curse he never heard before and liked how colorful fillorian swears could be some time. She was not ready yet, but Eliot asked Quentin for a new bassinet of water and clean cloths. 

‘’Why do you need warm water,’’ Arielle asked when her husband was gone. ‘’It’s nice to be cleaned, but it can wait. ‘’   
‘’I need to keep him busy before he explodes next to you.’’ 

Arielle laughter was mixed with pain, but at least she was now smiling. Admitting she was hot, she asked for the window to be open, and the sound of the pouring rain seemed to calm her down a bit. She continues to breathe, closing her eyes and rubbing her belly. 

Four hours later, Arielle was visibly exhausted and tired of hurting, Quentin had been sent finding another bunny to request the midwife, and Eliot felt useless. At least the rain had stopped so if the first message had gone through, someone was one its way to help them. 

Eliot looked down, seeing a hint of light hair trying to push its way through. He looked up to Arielle. 

‘’I think we should try to push a bit if it hurts too much you tell me alright? But I see the baby, head. You are doing fine. ‘’  
‘’It hurt so bad ‘El. ‘’   
‘’I know. It’s almost over. ‘’

He kneels down and, that part he knew what to do. At least, in theory. A woman wasn’t the same thing as a cow, but movies give you an idea of the differences. He put a hand on her belly, and when it felt the contraction, he nodded. 

‘’push. ‘’ 

The woman closed her eyes and did. Apparently, her body was ready cause Eliot could see a bit more of the baby. 

‘’alright you can stop a moment, ‘’ he said, then he turned his head toward the door. ‘’ Q, bring your ass here.’’ 

Quentin arrived quickly after Eliot’s yell and understood when he saw him kneeling between the leg of his wife. The almost-father sat next to her, took her hand and whispered something in her ear while she was ordered to push again. 

Twenty minutes later, Eliot was cleaning a screaming and bloodied baby. Quentin was crying, having just cut the umbilical cord. Once wrapped in the only clean towel left in the room, he gave the small human being to the crying mother. 

‘’It’s a boy.’’ He announced, crying with her. 

The midwife arrived an hour later and took over Arielle care. Quentin stayed with her. Eliot went to take a shower, needing to wash from all the body liquid that was still on him. And as he looked at the blood leaving his hand, he started to cry. He now had a son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright.... I never wrote so fast so many chapters in my life. Does it show I was WAITING for that chapter to happen hahaha!  
> I tried not to be too graphic cause things I read about birth giving were.... *shivers*   
> anyway, we have a baby coldwater now :3
> 
> Dont expect another quick update like that, but im happy i got to write this one so fast


	28. 27- Quentin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first few weeks of the arrival of Rupert, Quentin and Eliot discover a whole new meaning to the world useless.

The first few weeks of the arrival of Rupert, Quentin and Eliot discover a whole new meaning to the world useless. All the baby was doing was sleeping and drinking, keeping Arielle awake and busy while the boys could only really take care of him when he was asleep or needed a diaper change. At least, the new mother had quickly stop putting up a fight about doing chores. Quentin had calmly reminded her that she needed as much sleep as she could and they didn’t mind doing the dishes and the laundry. Her hormones being all over, she cried over her apple tasting strange and agree with her husband before going to sleep until Rupert wanted to eat. 

Nights were strange too. Rupert was sleeping in the crib, next to their bed so that Arielle could breastfeed easily. She tried to calm his cries quickly, but it woke the boys up more often than not. Even when Eliot managed to sleep through it, Quentin ended up trying to stay awake to keep company with his wife. He would never admit it out loud, but the sight of her giving her milk to their son had made him cry more than once. 

Arielle’s family came one night over dinner to coo at the new addition to the family. Eliot went all out to impress them and cooked one of his best meal, there was laughter, and everyone held the baby until it required more milk. Arielle fell asleep against Eliot while everyone was talking over the fire, Quentin holding his son like he as the most precious thing on earth. Because he was. 

It’s on the third week that Quentin noticed how Eliot barely held Rupert. Yes, he gushing over him and help to clothe him, but the moment he had him in his arm, he tried quickly to get rid of him or put him down to a comfortable place. This had something with Fen and Fray, he was sure of it. Though what was the cause was still a mystery. Feeling his boyfriend needed out of the cottage and the new family life, he sent him on an errand to the city, to get new clothes and many baby goodies Arielle had refused to buy before she was holding a breathing baby in her arm. Quentin made sure he asked in the middle of the day, so Eliot would have an excuse to miss the last cart and stay a night at the inn, where he could sleep a full night. 

After sending him off, Quentin went inside and slid into the bed to wrap his arm around his wife. She turned so she could face him, her eyes puffy and bags under her eyes. He probably looked the same. 

‘’Did I wake you up’’ he whispered, putting hair behind her ear   
‘’I can’t fall asleep’’ she admitted with a sad chuckle. ‘’Which stinks because I am so tired.’’

Quentin smiled softly and kissed her, sighing when he felt her answering back. She was in no physical health to have intercourse right now and honestly; it wasn’t what he wanted right now. He just wanted this. Holding her, kissing her, loving her, while their baby was asleep. 

Their baby. 

‘’I sent Eliot to the city get the list we made for Rupert. ‘’ Quentin continued, a bit overwhelmed with the idea that he was a father now. ‘’He seemed so relieved I feel bad not having asked before.’’  
‘’I think Rupert makes him think about the family he left behind. And we both know he’s been avoiding that as much as he can.’’  
‘’I’ll talk to him, I’m worried too.’’

Quentin held Arielle tighter as she put her head on his chest. He played with her loose hair and made his finger dance along her back until he felt her breath slow down. When he was sure his wife was sleeping, he allowed himself to nap. 

Rupert woke them up thirty minutes later, hungry and a diaper full. 

Arielle was cooking dinner while Quentin was sitting outside holding the baby in his arm, marvel by the sight of him needing his whole hand to grab one of his fingers. Rupert had the blue of Arielle’s eyes, and he probably didn’t saw much, but the new father promised himself to fill them with wonders. 

“Fuck I wish we had cameras right now” a voice chimed near him.

To his surprise, Quentin saw Eliot looking at him tenderly. In two long step, the boy was kissing him while Rupert continued to grab his finger. 

“I didn’t expect to see you tonight” Quentin admitted as Eliot put their bottomless bag on the floor.   
“It was a small run” Eliot shrugged, “everything was at the same store, literally took me half an hour. I even got in time to get the second to last cart of the day. “   
“I mean, I thought you’d wanted a break.”

Eliot put his finger in place of Quentin’s and beam when Rupert decided to take it, his eyes trying to find who it belonged. 

“I know, I realized what you did during the cart ride over there. And to be honest, I was grateful.” the older man said, making a point not to look at his boyfriend. “But then I went to that shop Arielle told us, and I ended up buying almost everything. “

Quentin snorted, wishing he had been there to see it. He would have done the same he was sure. Even on Earth, he was a sucker for kid’s clothes. They were so tinny and cute. 

“Then I started to worry if he had enough diaper until I came back because I know we’ve been low and we didn’t do laundry today. And I found things that would help Arielle overflow of milk and...”

Eliot sight, frowning. He tried to look upset but it was at this exact moment Rupert decided to put the finger in his mouth and suck on it. Quentin melted too. Fuck he was cute. 

“you worried.” Quentin finished the sentence, understanding. He was not sure if he would be able to leave the house a few hours without wanting to go back and be sure everyone was alright. Maybe it was a good thing cell phones, and their endless texting possibilities were not a thing in Fillory.

Eliot nodded pulling his finger away from Rupert’s mouth who let a small cry in protest, trying to pull it back in. Quentin looked at his son and wondered how it could be possible to love someone so much and yet not to know a thing about him. 

“Fen would have been such a good mother,” Eliot said after a few moments of silence.   
“Fen?”  
“Yeah, can’t stop thinking about her, to be honest. When I see Arielle nursing Rup’, or just you cuddling him I feel... it’s not fair that I get to have this and she got robbed of this chance. You know?”

Quentin nodded, biting his lips. He hesitated a second before asking;

“Is that why you don’t want to hold him, you don’t think you deserve it?”  
“Yeah, something like that.” 

Eliot’s voice choked up, and Quentin wishes he could do something about the pain his boyfriend was living at the moment. The whole marriage with Fen was his fault after all. With Julia they had planned for it, not knowing Eliot would have to pay the price. And he was paying it over and over, still hurting when life litteraly gave him a way to leave everything behind without being a runaway dad. Guilt

“It’s not your fault if she didn’t get to be with her baby, the fairy took her away. It’s their fault.”  
“You didn’t saw her when she came back from there Q, she...fuck she was broken. “

Rupert had fallen asleep in Quentin’s arm, and Eliot got his finger freed from the baby’s mouth, whipping the saliva against his pants. 

“When we found out about the quest and everything she was carrying a log everywhere, cradling it like it was her baby. When bunnies started to be our way to talk, she always manages to have one near that she could take and cuddle and kiss. Talking to them like she was their mom and me their dad. It wasn’t weird at the end. It was sad. Margo and I didn’t know what to do about it. I mean we tried to talk about it once, and it took her two days to come out of bed after that. So we might...fuck no we did give up on her a bit. Did she want to rock a log? If it made her happy why not. “

Quentin didn’t know Fen as much as he wanted to, but he couldn’t blame her breakdown. She had spent a months prisoner of the fairies, got robbed of her baby and only came back because Fillory was in danger. A few hours later, she was back to be a puppet of the fairy but now, in her own house. If he was honest with himself, Quentin wasn’t sure he would have stayed sane either in those conditions. 

“Yes, now she got an older Fray but... I don’t know; it's not fair. I never wanted to be a father and look at me. Meanwhile, she did and....”

The sun was setting down, Arielle was signing in the kitchen, it smelled like chicken and cheese. Eliot reached for his flask in his pocket and drank a long moment. 

“I think a way to honor Fen’s memory, is to be what she had wanted to be,” Quentin said after a moment of silence. “I know she believed you could be a wonderful father. So let’s prove her right and love the fuck out of Rupert. Be the dad she know you can be”

Eliot drank again before looking at Quentin, a sad smile on his lips, then nodded. His eyes had a light in them proving he was thinking fast and hard. 

“Aren’t you ‘the fool’ of the quest, since when did you start becoming smart” he finally said. 

Unable to punch him since his arms were busy, Quentin kicked his boyfriend's leg, both of them laughing and trying to make the moment a bit lighter. 

“Do you want to hold him now? I could help Arielle with dinner. Then you can show us how much you spoiled our son. “

Eliot seemed hesitant so Quentin gave it to him without his permission, helping him with the arm position so he would be more comfortable. After a reassuring kiss, Quentin let his boyfriend alone with his son and walk into the kitchen where he pulled his arm around Arielle who was cutting cheese. The couple kissed slowly and lovingly, enjoying a few minutes alone together.

After dinner, Eliot showed everything he got for Rupert, including a brown teddy bear that was bigger than him.


	29. 28- Eliot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finding the right timing to fuck someone becomes hard when you have a baby in the house now.

One morning, as he was wrapping his arm around a sleepy Quentin while Arielle slipped silently away to see Rupert, Eliot realized with horror that he was now in a part of his life where he had to think of a moment where he could have sex. It wouldn’t be spontaneous and anywhere, everywhere. Routine had settled in the house with Rupert and now that the adults were starting to understand the basis of being parents, Eliot’s body was screaming of hunger for all those weeks without Quentin’s lips on his flesh, without the bottomless pit of lust you get right before an orgasm, without being able to fuck his boyfriend when and how he wanted. And waking him up to a handjob seemed not the best idea knowing that if the baby would fall back asleep by miracle, Arielle might come back. And gods know that, after helping giving birth, he wasn’t ready to see a vagina for the rest of his life. Plus, she seemed still physically recovering so it would be rude to fuck next to her. Sighing, he kissed Quentin’s next softly until he sent him shivers, then got up and went in the shower. 

His morning boner had only increased at the touch of Quentin’s skin, and he grabs himself with a sigh. Closing his eyes, he imagined himself still in bed with his partner, kissing his skin long enough to leave a mark as his hand was going in his underwear. The empowering sensation of feeling Quentin hardening in his hand as he lustfully wakes him up, his whimper filling the room. How he adores stopping right before his boyfriend would come to make the pleasure last longer, and for that hungry and pleading look, he always gives him. How he always turn to grab a long kiss before undressing them. Quentin could be predictable, but in bed, it was the best weapon against him. 

A knock on the door broke his building orgasm and Eliot sigh, angry. The door opened to Quentin who was still waking up. Eliot anger faded away while his hope of touching his boyfriend for real was raising up. 

“Can I join you” Quentin croaked, audibly having spoken his first words of the day. 

Eliot smiled and nodded, looking at him undress making him even harder. There was an awkward moment where both boys were trying to find a comfortable position to have water over them, but the moment he could, Eliot grabbed Quentin’s neck and pulled him in a deep and sinful kiss that was only answered by a gasp and a moan. 

“I felt your dick near my ass when you woke me up” whispered Quentin as he grabbed Eliot’s hardness. “and fuck I feel as horny as a teenager right now. “

His hair was wet, and some strand was stuck to his face, his eyes were still puffy with sleep, and he was he was blushing over his last sentence. Eliot never saw Quentin so beautiful. He moans against his neck as his boyfriend was stroking him faster.

“as a teenager hmm” teased Eliot, grabbing his boyfriend ass with greed.  
“It’s been a while” Quentin laughed before kissing him, and he couldn’t help himself to laugh kissing him back.  
“Too fucking long.”

Before he could say anything else, Quentin was on his knee, not bothered by the fact that he barely had the water from the shower on him. 

“Jesus fucking Christ” Eliot swore as he felt his boyfriend tongue teasing the tip of his hardness before swallowing it. 

Both men sigh with delight. Eliot put his hand in Quentin’s hair. The younger men closed his eyes and started to set a pace. It was hungry and sloppy, but both men needed it too much to comment on it. When he felt the tongue beginning to play with him as well, a curse left Eliot’s breath. He bucked his hips slightly, knowing his boyfriend was able to take more of him usually. As an answer, he felt Quentin’s hand on his ass as the younger man took him in his entirety, making sure to look at him while he was doing it. 

Fucking Christ, he was beautiful. 

“Touch yourself” ordered Eliot and Quentin's mouth stop the pace for a second so he could grab his erection, the moment the motion of his lips and tongue started again felt like a jolt of lust right in his dick. 

Grabbing the long brown hair again, he tugged them slightly and watched his boyfriend finding a pace on his hand that was matching his mouth; his eyes closed in concentration and delight. How many time he’d masturbate at this image, and now it wasn’t a fantasy. Feeling the end building up, he gasp and close his eyes, unable to stop himself to slightly trust inside of his mouth. 

“Fuck Q you feel so good” he whisper, needing now his hand to steady himself against the wall. 

He opens his eyes, saw Quentin’s fucking his hand as his cock was leaking. The glint of lust and pride in his eyes put Eliot over the edge, and he came inside his mouth. Usually, Quentin was skilled to swallow be he visibly had gasp from his near orgasm, and some of the semen was running on his chin. His mouth let out of Eliot cock and, still kneeling in the shower, he looked at his boyfriend with adoration. 

“ Can I -” Started Quentin but before he finishes to ask permission, a stream of cum exploded into his hand, his cock twitching. His cheek became red, his eyes, and he came into his hand, sighing Eliot’s name. 

This one one of the sexiest thing Eliot had witnessed in his life. 

After catching his breath, Quentin got up and push Eliot slightly so he could be under the water. With a loving touch, Eliot wiped the leftover on Quentin’s chin before joining his grin and kissing him passionately. It was good to be reminded that they were still in love, they were still into each other physically. 

Quentin put clothes on himself rather quickly, saying he would make breakfast and left the bedroom. His hair was not in the middle of his back, and Eliot started to like him with longer hair. It had taken him sometimes, but now the idea of seeing him with shoulder length like before was just not an option. After carefully choosing his clothes, he took out one of Arielle’s favorite dress and an adorable blue and yellow jumper for Rupert, that way both of them would dress more easily. That was one of the rare things he knew he could do without messing up too much. 

He walked to the living room where Arielle was still breastfeeding Rupert, holding her finger while drinking, mesmerized by his mother. Something warm lit up inside his chest that only the baby would spark. Unconditional love, most likely. Or some other bullshit.

‘’Do you think you could bake more of your muffins today?’’ Arielle finally said when she noticed the dark haired man walking toward her. 

He kissed her head, kissed Rupert’s then sat down next to her. 

‘’Sure’’ he agreed ‘’I didn’t know you still had cravings of food despite not being pregnant anymore.’’  
‘’I don’t’’ the mother laughed. ‘’but it’s a nice snack for me to have in the middle of the night with mister decide it’s time for his snack too.’’  
‘’It is a pleasure then.’’ 

Arielle looked at him warmly.

‘’You can do it later tonight, I don’t want to stop you from doing the puzzle.’’  
‘’It takes half an hour, I don’t think Quentin can mess up that much in such short time.’’

They both laughed and looked at the door, hoping to see the man they love coming with food and a happy smile. Nothing yet. Eliot's stomach grumbles, always hungry after a good fuck. 

‘’We can take care of Rup’ this morning, it’s not like he can run away. You could sleep a bit more. I know you woke up a lot last night.’’  
‘’Oh that would be great’’ She sigh ’’he must be growing or something, but he drinks more than usual it feels like the first day all over again.’’ 

Arielle took the baby out of her nipple, and he looked at her, milk forming bubbles on his lips. 

‘’Well, he stopped five minutes ago so he must not be hungry anymore.’’ 

Eliot took this opportunity to take the little human in his arm, making the motion he’d learn to make it burp, and giving Arielle free space for her to put back her breast in her nightgown. Quentin still found it wildly erotic to see her do this, but for Eliot, it had made him see nipples for more than a piece of nerve that give him pleasure during sex. Which was troubling and he wasn’t sure how to deal with the information yet. 

‘’Oatmeal’s ready,’’ Quentin said, arriving in the living room with a tray that he put on the small table. 

That was one of the rare things Quentin did better than Arielle and Eliot, and he liked to do it from time to time, probably feeling guilty that 90% of the food wasn’t cook by him. 

‘’We don’t have lots of fruit, do you know if Perry is coming today?’’ 

Arielle started to talk about the war, about the farms, Eliot half listening, half making sure Rupert had burp. This morning might have started with a bang, literally

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you Spooky (oneeyeddestroyer) for your help on the bj, im always super self-conscious when I write porn. its always hotter in my head ahah!
> 
> Sorry for the short update, Im focusing a lot on the dnd book but i still try to keep the pace going here. 
> 
> Have a good end of the weekend


	30. 29-Arielle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arielle leaves the cottage raging and wondering if she made the right choice to be with Quentin

The door of the house slammed, startling Rupert who began to cry. It broke Arielle’s heart to hear him, but she had to leave. She had to leave right now. Rage and bitterness made her cry, and she knew that everywhere she would go, nobody would take her side, nobody would understand. So she went toward the forest behind the house and started to walk, letting her sob echoing the air. This was it; she had enough.

The last thing she wanted to hear was that it was her hormones fault. She’d heard it her whole pregnancy and even after giving birth but Rupert was now two months old. Her hormones were back to normal thank you very much.

She stops walking because she was on the edge of a panic attack as her sob was getting stronger. Last time she’d cry that much, Lunk had told her everything she wasn’t for him. Maybe, in a sense, that was the same thing with her husband. She just had been foolish enough to believe that this time it would be different. Sitting on a bolder, she put her hand in her face and let herself have the emotion she was trying to repress for so long.

Her prayer to the gods had been unanswered this time; they didn’t help her find the strength to continue. She had to snap and woke up her baby who took forever to fall asleep. She wanted to think it was the boys' problem to put him back to bed, but her mother’s heart couldn’t help to feel guilty. Only her pride and stubbornness made her stay inside the woods.

She heard Quentin’s voice calling her, and she knew he would find her within minutes. She needed to calm down. But she didn’t want to. She wanted to hurt and to cry and to be selfish for a moment. Trying to keep balance, she put her legs against her chest and buried her face. Her heart hurt like a dagger had been plunged into it.

Had she married him too soon? Out of grief and fear of loneliness?

This question brought up a wave of anxious self-doubt that doubled her tears, and she started to understand when Quentin was saying how he couldn’t control his anxiety attack, how it was like the emotion taking over your head and you were bound to their will. Nothing could calm her down right now. Ten thousand breathing exercise would not stop her head from spinning in all directions.

Quentin had the good sense not to come finding her after all.

She took a long time to calm down. Longer than she ever did. With Lunk, with her mom, with her brother, there was always someone to comfort her. This time, no one could. It was a lonely sentiment.

She was starting to worry about her baby, unable not to think about his cry. Looking up to the sky to see how many time had passed, she startled when she saw a red bird frozen in mid-air. His wings bent like they were flapping and yet, not moving. In fact, nothing around her moved. No flowers, no small animals in the bush, not even the wind blowing into the threes.

“Are you feeling any better?” A young voice called not far behind from her.

Startled, Arielle looks behind her, standing up from the rock she’d been on. A hooded figure was standing in front of her, the black hood hiding any distinct feature.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you, I figure you needed time. And it’s the one thing I could give”

The accent the hooded had was none she ever heard. It was not from Fillory, not from Loria and not even the one Eliot and Quentin had.

“Who are you? What is happening?”Arielle ended up asking, glancing at the bird again, puzzled and amazed by this view. She looked back at the dark cloaked figure, and something clicked. How many time has she heard her husband and his boyfriend talk about her? “Are you the watcher woman?”  
“I'm surprised you know me by this name, I only came to this era a few times, but yes, some call me like that.”  
“What do you want?” Arielle asked again, not sure if she should be scared. This woman had an aura that unnerved her.  
“Nothing, I was merely watching, to be frank. When I saw you curled up like that, I figured I’d give you time before Quentin arrive.”  
“You know him?”  
“Personally? No. Well, not yet. I know we will. Our paths are interwoven in more way that I thought if you want me to be honest. I didn’t expect him to be the owner of the cottage in front of the impossible puzzle. “

This made absolutely no sense. If she weren’t wreck by rage toward him, she would have asked more question about Quentin, but right now, it was the last thing she wanted to do. Maybe stopping him from coming had been an act of kindness from the Watcher Woman because if she saw him before she calmed down, she could have snapped his neck. Figuratively of course.

“I must admit I am quite new at this time travel thing, but if the clock sent me here, toward you, it meant something.”

Alright, now Arielle was afraid. She glanced up again, to look at the bird. Then glanced down. The wooded figure as gone, the trees were now dancing with the wind, the red bird was flying away from her sight. What in the seven hells just happened?

“Arielle?!”

This time it was Quentin’s voice. She saw his shape coming between the tree lines, and she closed her eyes, a rush of emotion taking over her. Now she was afraid and back to angry and heartbroken. She closed her eyes and decided that right now, the Watcher woman could wait, but her husband’s attitude couldn’t. She would be scared later. Right now, it was time for hurt.

Quentin finally found her, his long hair out of his usual ponytail, eyes bloodshot and teary. He as doing this thing with his shirt that always ended up creating holes in them, tugging on the edge of the sleeve so he could hide his hands in it as he could sink into his skin. Of course, he wasn’t thinking that she would be the one fixing his clothes when the time was due.

Her eyes couldn’t help to look at his shoulder, the one that was made of wood. The thing that she had just learned and had sparked this whole explosion. Her heart felt pierced slowly by another dagger as the couple looked at each other, unable to know what to say first.”

“Is Rupert alright?” She ended up asking, the hurt flushing over her and making her voice crack.  
Despite having calmed down. Despite the time the Watcher Woman had given her. She was back to square one and was a mess of tears.

“Yes, Eliot is - “

She didn’t let him finished and snapped.

‘’If you wanted a kid to raise with Eliot you should have told me instead of just making me fall in love with you’’ She said, her hand curling into a fist. Her whole body was shaking.  
‘’What are you talking about.’’  
‘’The moment Rupert came in our life, you two became super distant with me and worked on taking care of Rup’ and... I know I never had a chance to win over Eliot, but it's getting hard to overlook and now that my job as a wife is done.....’’

Self-doubt came back to her mind, and she felt her breath shorten as a massive sob got out of her mouth. She sat back down on the boulder, feeling her legs shaking. Hand on her mouth, she closed her eyes and cried, not knowing how to explain everything that was going through her brain right now. It was too much. She wanted everything to stop.

‘’Breathe ‘Elle ‘’ Quentin whisper as she felt him sitting next to her.  
‘’Fuck you.’’  
‘’I know. But breathe please.’’

It was rare that she swore as they do on Earth, but living with both boys had made her pick those habits. She didn’t even think of how she wanted to curse at him, she just did. In his language.

‘’I know you and Eliot love to say that you had 39 tries together and that's what pulled you together from the beginning. I know you find it romantic, and all... but have you thought of _me_.” she sobbed, looking at her feet, unable to look at her husband. “ I never was in those 39 others lives because you died years before the quest that leads you there. I only have one life with you, and it feels it’s not enough for you.’’

She wiped her eyes and continued to talk before he had the chance to put a word in.

‘’I should have known. I should have known that our marriage will always have secrets. Because there are things we never talk, you don’t want to talk. And then I discover it, and it's this all over again. I am tired that our fights are always about bullshit you didn’t handle in your other life or how we can't talk about it in this one. I am tired of discovering things about you, Quentin! I should know you by heart you are my husband!’’

She looked at him with so much pain, his face change from surprised to sad comprehension. His eyebrow rose up and, like every time he was feeling something too big for himself, his eyes became so full of vulnerability and emotion that they were a mirror of his soul. His stupid beautiful puppy eyes.

‘’I truly forgot about the shoulder it’s-’’  
‘’It’s not about that stupid shoulder!” Arielle snapped, almost yelling. “It’s about me learning the night before our wedding that you come from the future. It’s about having to comfort Eliot and discovering he had a wife and a kid while I am still hurting over the miscarriage. It about never fits fulling in, and never being pulled out. I want you to love me the way I love you. ‘’

That’s it. That why she hurt so much. She realized how much her love was so profound for him. And he already had something so intense with his boyfriend; she could never make him feel the way she felt. And it was breaking her heart.

‘’I love you so fucking much, and I can’t pretend things are equal in our family anymore. You always promise me I’d be something more than a wife for you, but the moment we got Rup’ ...’’  
‘’We try to help with the kid my love, but most of what he wants, we can’t provide-’’  
‘’How many time did you slept with Eliot since the baby is here? And how many time have we?’’

The question was rhetorical. Even Quentin knew it. Because the answer to the last question was easy. Zero. They both knew she was healed for weeks now, and yet, he didn’t have to try anything on her. She just realized, now, how much it hurt her.

‘’You wanted to raise a family, that’s why you went and sought for someone else than Eliot. But I think you want a family with Eliot, not with me. I was just the baby provider-’’

‘’Arielle, look at me.’’ This time it was Quentin cutting her off. He grabbed her face and put his hand on both sides, his thumb stroking the ever-flowing tears running from her eyes. He was crying too His eyes were searching hers, and only the aching sound his voice made had made her look back..’This isn’t true. Alright? I wanted a family, and I wanted one with you. You are not a mean to an end. You are my end. I want to spend the rest of my life with you and raise our baby with you. ‘’

Oh, how she wishes she would believe that.

‘’Maybe I got so worried that El’ would feel included that I neglected you and I am fucking sorry for that. I never wanted you to feel like this. Like you are second best. Fuck ‘Elle I’d be insane without you by my side. ‘’ His head touched her, and his hand slid to her neck, their tear mixing as the couple was now sharing the pain. ‘’I fucked up, I am sorry I-’’

She kissed him. Because she loved him so much. She was angry at him and fear crept into her heart about their marriage, but the way he quickly reacted at her rant, the words he said. They were sad, they were beautiful, she hated that they both felt that way. She hated that they were kissing and crying and having so much emotion right now their heart could explode. His kiss was as desperate that it was filled with begging for forgiveness. It was passionate and sad.

‘’You’re right, of course, you are,” he said breathlessly when their kiss came to an end. “We don’t talk about a big part of your life and expect you to understand and be comprehensive when you learn new things. Sometimes, I forget and I agree, it has to stop. I... I’ll tell you everything. Even if it hurt, or a whole year, I will tell you every detail of my life that I remember. ‘’

She laughs through her tears, nodding. That she’d like. He was telling her all those fantastic stories about The Doctor and his flight in the TARDIS; maybe it was time he was telling his story. He put her hair behind her ear, those stupid beautiful puppy eyes looking at her, a tentative smile on his lips.

‘’And never think that I needed 39 life to fall in love with you.” he continued. “I needed just one to know that you are the love of my life. ‘’

This time he kissed her, and she answered back. Her soul bruised but slowly healing through his words. Each kiss he gave her, reminding her that, in the end, he chose her too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone that helped me figure out how to continue the fic, I ended up being super angsty in this chapter by accident ahhaha. Have a good day!


	31. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue

It took Quentin a few months to tell his whole story, Eliot pitching in from time. To be sure she didn’t forget anything, to be sure one day Rupert could know about his dads' crazy adventures, she wrote them down. There was one book note, then, two, then three. He talks, she wrote, they did the puzzle, Rupert grew up.

There were first. Rupert first fever that leads them to stay awake for almost 72 hours. The first time Arielle and Quentin left their son for a whole night, needing some together time. The first time Rupert laughed. The first time he sat down. The first time he crawls. The first time he licks one of his daddy's' tiles.

There were joys. The war ended. Nakia came back. Elias had decided to follow their advice and left the farm to go to Brightheaven to learn how to be a baker. There was Arielle’s dad remarrying. The garden was growing so much they expended it. Rupert first Booming Festival and his eyes full of wonder by the glowing flowers.

It was not easy. Sometimes they bicker, sometimes they laugh, sometimes they had make up sex. After Arielle admitting feeling like a third wheel, both men had made sure she felt included, it wasn’t perfect, but at least they tried.

Arielle didn’t think back of the Watcher Woman until one day, when Rupert was digging in the dirt next to her as she was doing her garden, Eliot grabbing the tile to reset the puzzle for tomorrow as Quentin came to steal a quick kiss from her before going to put their drawing in the binder they kept them.

Rupert was delighted, plunging his hands in the dirt like his mother, when he found the tile. A golden one that Arielle never saw. It was the same shame and texture than the other one, but the color. She never saw it. She traded her son discovery with one of her cucumbers, so he wouldn’t let a cry of injustice if she took it away from him. She couldn’t help but laughed when she saw the baby trying to put the whole thing in his tinny toothless mouth.

_I must admit I am entirely new at this time travel thing, but if the clock sent me here, toward you, it meant something._

Those had been the words the hooded woman had said. It rang in her ears as clear as it was yesterday. She looked at her baby. She looks at Eliot who was signing. She looked at Quentin who was clearing the table of the papers and pastels.

Today was the fifth year Quentin and Eliot had stumbled into Fillory. It had been the first year they didn’t even acknowledge it. Arielle only knew it was today because it was written on the calendar of last year and she had been recopying birthdays and such not long ago.

The beauty of all life.

Was it this? A quiet life, a son that love birds and a family that wasn’t perfect, but try to protect each other. If this wasn’t it, nothing was.

As she looked at the tile, Arielle understood that she had to make a decision; tell them now and have this quiet life change forever, or re-bury it and tell them later. Enjoy her life her, knowing that the gods had granted her the blessing to know she found the truest beauty of life. Both had pros and cons. Causes and consequences. And she had to choose now, within the few seconds where both her partners were looking away, and her baby was battling a cucumber.

She sent a prayer to the god before turning toward them, holding the tile up in the air.

“Eliot, Quentin, you need to see this”.

The end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wait whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?  
> aH! i wanted tha plot twist for months im so happy to finially put it out there!  
> Dont worry, it might be the end of The Golden Tile, but there will be a follow-up fic with the repercussion of the boys having found the tile while still young, Arielle alive and Rupert not yet one year old. I cant WAIT to write it!  
> But first, I post this and let it cool down a little  
> Keep an eye open on my next fic though ;)
> 
> Thanks for all the kudos, reviews and amazing comment, this was a journey to write this fic and I couldn't be prouder. 
> 
> Love -Cath


End file.
